Impossible Love
 by: Hankster

© 2009 by the author

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

Chapter 6

During the next two months, I travelled to Cleveland and St. Louis, but Buffalo was not on the agenda.  I kept in constant touch with Mac.  We cried a lot, whacked off a lot together on the phone, and we were generally two miserable individuals.  It was comforting to know, but I was extremely jealous, that he and Jonathan were making it together as often as possible.  In between business trips, I managed to have sex with Marsha about once a week.  I could sense that she was beginning to be dissatisfied and I was secretly happy about that.

One Saturday, she went to a day spa with our next door neighbor.  The neighbor’s husband was stuck with the kids, but I was free to come and go.  I decided that it would be a good day to visit Jake McLean.  I drove to Oceanside and found the deli.  The store was really busy and crowded.  There were at least five people behind the counter, and at least six tiers of customers.  How was I ever going to speak to Jake?  I pushed my way to the front, and spotted him behind the counter.  He was even prettier than I remembered him at the airport.  I had sex with his partner, and I wouldn’t mind a little bit of action with him.

I did not take a number, preferring to wait until the crowd let up.  The store hours were posted, and on Saturday they closed at 3 PM.  I figured the crowds would let up by noon, and then I could get hold of the beautiful guy behind the counter.   I didn’t have to wait that long.  At about 10 AM, Jake did not serve the next customer.  Instead he went through a door to the back of the store.  I ran to the door and before Jake could close it, I grabbed the handle.

“What the hell!” he said.

“I’m sorry, Jake, but I need to talk to you,” I said.  “I’m a good friend of Jonathan’s.  My name is Jonathan Walters, Wallie.”

“Holy mother of God,” Jake almost screamed.  “Jonathan has told me all about you.  I feel like I’ve known you for years.”  He held the door open and beckoned me to come into the back room.  The room was full of meats, cheeses and fresh breads.  The aroma of the room almost gave me an orgasm.  In a far corner of the room, a small office was partitioned off.  There was a bathroom in the office.  Jake took me to the office and closed the door.

“Excuse me,” he said.  “I have to pee badly.”  He opened the bathroom door and began to pee without closing the door.  His cock was a replica of Jonathan’s and I began to get hard.  It was uncut and well sized.  When he was done, he shook it off, replaced it and washed his hands.  Then he came up to me and to my happy surprise he hugged me and kissed me on the lips.

“That was nice,” I said, “but what for?”

“That’s for you and Mac teaching Jonathan all those wonderful new tricks.  When he came home for Thanksgiving, I couldn’t believe what he did for us.  By Christmas vacation, our sex life became a fantasy world come true, and I owe it to you and Mac.”  He gave me another kiss. 

“Well, it was mostly Mac who had the pleasure of teaching, but I had the pleasure of allowing him to practice on me just once.”  We both laughed at that.  “You know, Jonathan is like a son to me, so that makes you my son in law.  Maybe I should start calling him, junior.”  We both laughed again.

“Listen, I can break away about noon.  The crowds let up then.  I have a couple of high school kids working for me part time.  I’ll ask them to stay a little extra.  Will you be able to spend a couple of hours with me this afternoon and we’ll get to know each other?”

“I’d love that,” I said.  “While I’m waiting, I think I’ll buy some deli to take home.”  The smells out there have me salivating.”  We went out front and Jake waited on me, much to the displeasure of some of the customers on line.  He refused to take money from me and when I protested, he said.  “I can’t take money from my father in law.”  Those customers who heard that were assuaged a little bit from their anger at my having cut into line.  I purchased a pound of ham, a pound of Genoa salami, a pound of kosher salami, a half pound of Swiss cheese and a dozen New York hard rolls.  I wanted to buy some chopped liver, but I was afraid it wouldn’t hold up until I got home.  I put everything on the back seat of my car.  It seemed cold enough outside, if I wanted to buy the chopped liver, but I decided in the end not to do it.  That would give me a reason to return another time. 

A little before noon, Jake removed his apron and came out from behind the counter.  “My dad’s closing up today so we can get going.  I just got my own apartment only a block away, so that when Jonathan comes home, we now have our own private hang out.  Come, we can walk there.”

Do your parents know about you two?” I stupidly asked, as we approached his building.

“They’ve known since we first met, and both sets of parents are cool with it.  In fact our parents have become best friends and consider themselves to be in laws.”

“That’s great,” I said.  Once again, I cursed my own timidity which had put me into my present situation.

Jake’s apartment was small, but very cozy.  It had one fair sized bedroom, a small living room and a pretty big eat in kitchen.  “I’ll make lunch,” he said.  “How about a deli sandwich?”

“That’s about what I would have expected,” I laughed.  Jake motioned for me to sit at the kitchen table.  He set out plates, flatware and napkins.

“Soda or beer?” he asked.

“Beer sounds good with deli,” I answered.

Jake made us salami on rye sandwiches.  He put the beer and deli mustard on the table and we sat down to eat together.  The sandwich was delicious, but I kept thinking that Jake would taste even more delicious.  Being the older of the two of us, I figured I should be the aggressive one.

“I wouldn’t be telling tales out of school, if I told you that Mac and Jonathan are having sex regularly.  They have been open about it, and I’m all right with it.  How about you?”

“Same here.  Mac has done nothing but bring my own sex life to new heights.  But in the meantime, I have to satisfy myself with phone sex.  We had  three way phone sex last week.”

“That’s fantastic,” I said.  “That hasn’t happened to me yet, but I intend to remedy that situation.”

Unexpectedly, Jake put his hand on mine.  “ I think that it would be very appropriate if we did what our guys are doing.  Don’t you think?” he asked.

‘You don’t have to ask me twice,” I said.  We both jumped up, and abandoning our half eaten sandwiches and our partially consumed beers, we grabbed each other in a bone crushing bear hug.  Our lips met, and our tongues found each other.  We explored our mouths as if we didn’t know what a mouth tasted like.

Moments later we were lying naked in Jake’s bed.  “Let me show you what Jonathan taught me,” he whispered in my ear.

“Show me.  I can’t wait.”  He began to give me a trip around the world, front and back, which lasted almost an hour.  My eyes were closed, and it was easy to picture Mac doing the honors.  The technique was exactly the same and for good reason.  When there was not a spot on my body, he hadn’t licked with his tongue, he took me into his mouth.

“Oh Mac,” I whispered.  “That’s wonderful.”  In spite of my blunder of calling him, Mac, Jake didn’t miss a beat. 

“I’m getting close,” I said to him, and he stopped sucking my cock.  He got a condom and lube from his night table drawer, and handed them to me.  “I like it doggie style,” he said. “If you don’t mind.”

He turned over and got himself on all fours.  He grabbed two pillows and supported his head with them.  I put on the condom and greased my cock.  Then I put lube on my finger and lubed his ass hole.  I straddled this hunk, growing crazier by the minute.  I tried to go in slowly, but I was so worked up that I started to just ramrod right in.  Jake flinched for just a second, but I fell into his pit rather easily.  I held still waiting for him to get used to me.

“Fuck me as hard as you can,” he said to my surprise, so I started in and out, never once letting my cock head fall out of his ass.  No matter how hard I thrust, Jake yelled, “Harder, harder.”  That was good for me too, and I came rather quickly, filling up the condom.

After awhile we flushed the soaking condom down the toilet and wiped Jake’s ass clean.  We lay side by side holding hands and saying nothing.  Finally Jake said, “Would you mind if I came in your mouth, instead of your ass, this time.  I want you to taste me.”

“I wouldn’t mind at all,” I said.  “It would be a pleasure.”  It wasn’t hard for me to fantasize that I was with Mac.  Their cocks were both uncut, and about the same size and girth.  While I was pleasuring Jake, and me for that matter, I realized that he had used the phrase this time.  That meant that Jake expected us to do this again and that was OK with me also.

When he came, Jake gave me so much cum, that I could not swallow all of it.  I swallowed what I could.  The rest ran down his cock and his pubic area.  I scooped some up on my finger and offered it to him.  He took it greedily.

We lay side by side trying to recover and basking in the afterglow of good, no, superior sex.  We begin to kiss.  Our tongues explored each other’s mouths and our teeth nipped and teased our necks.  “We need to tell Jonathan and Mac about this or it won’t be all right,” Jake said.

Without answering him, I reached for my cell phone on Jake’s night table and phoned Mac.  It went to his answering machine, so he was either in the middle of an investigation or he was fucking Jonathan.  Because I had a tinge of guilt, I prayed it was Jonathan.  I left a two word message, “Call me.”

I handed the phone to Jake who proceeded to call Jonathan.  Jonathan answered on the first ring.  He was in his dorm studying.  “Hi love,” Jake said.  “Wallie just fucked me and I came in his mouth.”  Without giving Jonathan a chance to respond, he continued.  “I love him.  He insists that he is our daddy and we are his sons.  I love the thought.”

“I know how you feel,” Jonathan said.  “I love him too.  Let me talk to him.”

Jake handed me the phone.  “Hi, Junior,” I quipped.  “Watchya doing?”

“Studying, pops.  I don’t have to ask what you’re doing.  Are you in Jake’s little love nest?”

“Yup, and I’m trying to reach Mac.  He’s not answering his cell phone.”

“I can’t help you there.  I haven’t spoken to him today at all, and he was supposed to call me about dinner tonight,” Jonathan said.

“OK.  I love you,” I said, as I handed the phone back to Jake.

“I love you too,” Jake told his lover.  “I’m trying to get my dad to cover for me over a weekend soon, so I can get up to visit you.  Spring break is just too far away.”

“Make it soon, my darling.  Mac said we could stay in his apartment.”

“I’m working on it.  Until then, I love you with all my heart and soul.”  He started to cry and he hung up the phone.  I pulled him to me and held him tightly, until he stopped crying.

The clock on his night table said that it was 5:30.  “I gotta go,” I said regretfully.  I got out of bed and started to dress.  When I had my trousers on, I took my card out of my wallet.  “Call me anytime on my cell phone,” I implored, and let’s get together again soon.  You’re a life saver.”

“You’re a life saver for me too,” Jake said.  “Why don’t you take up squash?”

“What?”  I wondered what Jake was driving at, with such a strange question.

“Tell your wife, that some of the guys at work are taking up the game and you’ll be playing with them a couple of evenings a week and Saturday afternoons.  She won’t like it, but it will give us opportunities to get together.  You name the two evenings a week, and I’ll make myself available to you.”

“She’s already beginning to show me that she’s unhappy at our infrequent sex, and the poor quality of the sex when we do have it.  This will irk her even more.  I’ve got to work up my courage and tell her some day soon that I’m gay, and our only solution is to divorce.  I just don’t have the balls yet.”

“Don’t wait too long.  She’s getting older every day.  Let her go free while she’s still young and attractive.  When you are ready, maybe we can arrange to have her catch us together.  She’ll kick you out for sure.  After she does, you’re welcome to stay here until you figure out what you and Mac want to do.”

“That’s funny,” I said.  “I had thought the same thing recently, about getting caught, I mean.  Then I wouldn’t have to be brave and tell her anything.  Like they say, ‘a picture is worth a thousand words.’”

“You should be braver about your life and your future,” Jake said sternly.  “You’re one of the good guys and you deserve to be happy the rest of your life.  Don’t keep waiting to get your courage up.  Create courage.”

I started to cry and Jake wrapped his arms around me in an attempt to console me in what I considered to be an inconsolable situation.  He was holding me tightly when my cell phone rang.  I looked at it and smiled at him.  “It’s Mac,” I said.

“This one’s unbelievable,” he said.  “Some jerk shot his wife right down town on McKinley Circle in full view of hundreds of people.  Then he just stood there and waited for the police.  He not only killed his wife, he killed my whole afternoon.  I was supposed to spend it with Jonathan, but now I’m on my way to meet him for dinner.”

“Good,” I said, “because Jake and I finally met, and we had each other for lunch and dessert.  Suffice it to say, we were both so horny, we couldn’t resist each other.  Jake has already told Jonathan.  I’m glad we spoke before you met him for dinner.”

“Wow!” Mac said. “That’s big news indeed.  I’ve got something along those lines to ask you.  Tom and Dominick have been hinting that we should have a three way, and when you get here, a four way.  How does that grab you?”

“Tom’s like a brother to me,” I said.  “I’ll have to think about it.  In the meantime, if you would like to have fun, I’m all for it.  Just keep on loving me.”

“I’ll never stop,” Mac assured me.   “As for sleeping with your brother, we are already sleeping with our sons.”

“How true, and I am really enjoying it.”  I hesitated for a moment and then said, “Mac, honey, I am giving serious thought to telling Marsha that I am gay and that I need to divorce her.  I’m really getting convinced that no matter what she says, she’ll be better off.”

“Honey, I’m not pushing it, but it would be so wonderful.  I love you so much and living on stolen moments isn’t fair to either of us,” Mac said with authority.

All the way home, I rehearsed possible scenarios of how to tell Marsha about my sexual preference, but each scenario had flaws and continued to scare me to death.  I was convinced that having her find me naked in bed with Jake was a bad idea; still it was the least scary.

I was pleased to see that I got home before Marsha did.  I put the meat and cheese in the fridge and the rolls in the breadbox.  I figured we could have deli for dinner and I would freeze the left over meat and rolls.  I called her on her cell phone and she told me that she would be home in about fifteen minutes.

I went about setting the table, and I figured to remove the food from the fridge when we sat down to dinner.  While waiting for Marsha, I turned on the TV and watched the evening news.  For all Marsha could tell I had been sitting home like this all afternoon.

She literally floated into the house, all bubbly and refreshed from her day at the spa.  I stood up to kiss her and as she approached me her whole demeanor changed.  Instead of a kiss, I was greeted with a big slap on the face.  There were tears in her eyes.

“Bastard,” she yelled as she ran upstairs to our bedroom.  I heard the door slam shut.

What in the world did she see on me that gave me away.  Obviously my afternoon indiscretion was clear to her.  I walked over to the big mirror in the living room and stared in disbelief.  On my neck was the biggest hickey I had ever gotten or seen, and I was totally unaware of it.  It was the size of a half dollar and as purple as a plum.  I began to shake like a leaf, but I also realized that I would never have a better opportunity to come out with the truth.

I climbed the stairs slowly and knocked softly on our bedroom door.  I got no response so I opened the door.  Marsha was lying face up on the bed.  She was not crying and she appeared perfectly calm.  She was staring at the ceiling, barely moving or blinking her eyes.

“We need to talk,” I said.

“Who is she, and when did you stop loving me?”

“I never stopped loving you,” I protested.  “I’ll love you until the day I die, but there is something I must tell you.”  That statement must have piqued her interest.  She didn’t move her body, but she turned to look at me.  Her eyes fixed on mine.  I wanted to tell her the truth, but still I hesitated.

“Well tell me whatever lame excuse you want to,” she sneered.

“No excuses,” I said.  “Here’s the truth.  Maybe it would be more accurate to say, here’s the problem between us, and no amount of my loving you can change that.  Marsha honey, I’m gay.”

At first there was no reaction from her, but then she burst out laughing.  “If you’re gay,” she giggled,  “I’m The Virgin Mary.  You can do better than that.”

I took my wallet out of my pocket and groped for the secret compartment.  I pulled out a picture of Mac that I had taken with his digital camera when we were snowbound in his apartment.  He was totally naked, but his cock was discreetly hidden by a book.  I showed it to Marsha.

“This is Mac,” I said.  “He’s my lover.

Marsha stared at the picture.  She seemed frozen in time.  She stared for what seemed to me to be forever.  Then she gave out a blood curdling scream. 

“Get out,” she yelled.  “I hate you.  I never want to see you again.  The next time you hear from me, it will be through a lawyer.  She rolled over the bed and grabbed the phone on the table.  For a second I thought she was going to throw it at me, but she started to punch in a number.

I have no idea why I asked her, but I asked who she was calling.  Maybe I was afraid she was calling a hit man.

“If you must know, I’m calling my cousin Louise.  I want to get the number of the lawyer she used in her divorce.  He took her husband for everything.”

“That won’t be necessary,” I said.  “You can have whatever you want.  You can have everything.  I won’t fight you.  I’ll give you everything I own.  It’s a cheap price to pay for my identity.

“Come here,” Marsha said.  I approached her and she spit in my face.  Frankly, I could not blame her.

I packed three suitcases and my toiletries, and put them in the trunk of my car.  I drove a few blocks and then I pulled the car over.  I got out Jake’s number and called him.  Thank God he was home.

“Can you put me up for a day or two?” I asked.  “Marsha kicked me out.”

“Of course, I can, but how did this happen.  I didn’t think you quite had the courage yet.”

“Well, it seems you gave me one hell of a hickey.  At first she thought it was a woman, but I finally told her the truth.”

“Gee, I’m sorry.”  Jake said.  “It must have come out after you left me or I certainly would have warned you.”  He repeated several times, “I’m so sorry.   I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” I implored him.  “It was as good as her catching us in bed together.  From now on, you can give me as many hickey’s as you want to.”

“Stop talking, and get your ass over here.  I could use a little more of your magical tongue.”

“We’ll call the guys and my friend Tom when I get there.  Is your store open on Sundays?”

“Yes,” he answered.  But Sunday is my day off.”

“I’m off too,” I said.  “I just have a feeling that you’ll know exactly how to soothe my troubled soul.”

To be continued...

Posted: 05/15/09