“P” Is For the Peeping Pat
by: E Walk
(© 2009-2011 by the Author)
 

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Chapter 15  

The Relatives

Needless to say, Pat, Shawn and Shane weren’t very talkative when they arrived at the house.  In fact, everyone was exhausted when the Kincaids arrived, everyone had either been involved in a funeral, an attempted burglary, working more than normal, an inspection or a death, I looked at everyone, “I suggest that everyone go to bed and get rested, I have the feeling that the next couple of days are going to be extremely busy for some of us.”

When Pat and I were in bed, it was apparent that Pat wasn’t in the mood to be loved.  “Steve, I don’t know what to expect, tomorrow, the inspection team is going to be giving their report at nine o’clock in the morning.  I have to be there, since the areas being inspected are under my jurisdiction.  When am I going to take care of the arrangements for Mother’s funeral?”

“Pat, nothing says that the arrangements have to be made tomorrow, don't you have any relatives that you need to consult and have them help you with the arrangements?”

“Steve, I do have one sister.  She and her husband and their children live with my father who is still alive.  My parents split up when Denise and I were teenagers.  Denise lived with Dad and I lived with Mother.  I don’t know what caused the parents to split up, but they never got a divorce, My mother hated my dad so much that she wouldn’t agree to a divorce, She said, ’He ruined one life and more and I’ll be hanged if I’m going to give him chance to ruin anyone else‘s'.”

“Pat, do your sister and her family live with your father or does he live with them?”

“They live with my father.  My brother-in-law hasn’t been able to hold onto a job.”

“Does your father still work?”

“Steve, I honestly don’t know.  I haven’t talked to Dad or Denise in over a year.”

“Pat, go to sleep.  Things will seem clearer in the morning.  Let’s get the inspection team’s report out of the way, first, and then we can take it from there, one thing at a time.”

When we awoke in the morning, Pat went to the office so he would be there for the briefing of the inspection team.  He called to report, “Steve, the sheriff’s department got outstandings in all areas.  I’m going to go talk to the funeral home people, and make the arrangements for the services and the funeral.  Do you think your pastor would do the service, even though Mother wasn’t a member of your church?”

“I’m sure he will.  He did a very nice job with Don and Mike’s parents’ services.  I’ll call and tell him that you’re going to be stopping by.  I’d meet you there, but I need to make sure that Marty, Seth and Travis have everything that they need to clean the Hughes’ house.”

“When you call your relatives, you can let them know that they can stay at my house for the time that they’re here for the funeral, I’ll have Ethan and Nathan make sure it is ready for company.”

“Don and Mike will be busy with thank you notes, in the next several days.  I guess I need to find out who is working when?”

“Steve, you haven’t met my father and my brother-in-law.  They’re two of a kind.  They think they should be waited on.”

I laughed, “Patty, me boy, they aren’t going to get much being waited on, around here.”

“Steve, I forgot to mention; Denise and Abe have six kids.  They’ll probably expect us to feed them.  If we were to start feeding them, I'm sure they would make their stay an extended one, and we certainly don’t want that.”

Shane and Shawn had gone to clean out their grandmother’s apartment so Pat wouldn’t have to pay another month’s rent.  I sat down with Ethan, Nathan, Don, Mike and Tommy, “Guys, we only need one house to live in when we move back to town.  We need to decide which of the houses would be the most suitable for us to live in.”

Nate asked, “How many people are going to be living in the house?  That makes a difference as to which would be best.  Are the Sheriff, Shawn and Shane going to be living with us?”

I nodded. “I’m assuming so.”

Ethan shook his head, “Dad, neither of those two houses is large enough for all of us.  We need to trade the two houses in town in for a bigger one, or just live here all year round.”

Don shook his head, no, “Ethan, when the weather gets bad, we won’t be able to get to school and our after school activities.  I like what you said about buying a bigger house.”

Nathan was thinking practically, “Suppose Dad and the Sheriff have a falling out?  What happens when Don and I go to college?  We won’t need as much room.”

Tommy laughed, “Does that mean that once you go to college, you’ll never be coming home?  What are you going to do with your wife and Dad’s grandkids when you come to visit?  Are you going to be staying in motels when you come to visit?”

That caused everyone to laugh.

Everyone went to their assigned house, to clean.  Tommy, Don, Mike and I went to assist Travis, since his house needed the most work, because of the mess that the culprits had made. Don and Mike were used to good things, so they were able to shed some light on what might be valuable.  

Travis called an antique dealer and got evaluations on the furniture and the decorations.  The appraisals were far higher than we suspected they would be.

Travis was keen on getting rid of anything of value.  Seth and Marty had a difficult time convincing him that he needed to keep many of the things, so he would have some memories of the good times with his parents.  Once the first floor was cleaned and put in order, Travis just about lost it, “This is going to be difficult for me.  The house brings back so many memories of my parents.”

I hugged him, “Travis, it may be difficult now, but you will appreciate the remembrances of them as you get older and can share them with your family.”

Marty added his two cents, “Travis, you should keep everything as it is, for now.  When our things get here from California, you can always make changes if you’re still so inclined.  Our things aren’t too shabby, and we can have a humongous sale with the things that we don’t need.”

Seth looked at the rest of us who had been helping, “You people have things to do.  We’ll be fine, for now.  We’ll get some groceries at the market down the street.  Someone will need to pick up Travis for work, and then help us get our things here so you’re not so crowded at the house on the lake.”

Don and Mike went back to the house on the lake to work on their thank you notes.  Tommy and I went to see if we could be of any assistance to Shawn and Shane.  They had everything packed.  Shawn pointed, “We have Goodwill coming to pick up Grandmother’s clothes and utensils.  Can we put the other things in storage at the house on the lake?”

Tommy frowned, “Guys, we don’t have room for this furniture.”

Shane giggled, “If we took the furniture, we would be arrested for grand theft.  The apartment came furnished and that’s why Grandmother could live here.  She had lived in the same apartment with us before we moved here.”

Shawn had tears in his eyes, “Grandmother was just beginning to enjoy being unencumbered.  She was making new friends.  It was a great idea that your Dad had about us joining you at the lake.  It gave Grandmother time to do the things that she wanted to do instead of taking care of two teenagers.”

After the Goodwill truck had taken what the guys were sending, we loaded the few remaining things in the car.  It took the four of us no time at all to clean the apartment.  It was three o’clock when the apartment manager was handing the deposit money to Shawn.  We went to the house on the lake, unloaded the car and put the things in the basement.

The guys who were going to work left for the caterer’s office.  I
 reminded them to pick up Travis and take Seth and Marty‘s things to Travis‘ house.  We could get the rest of Travis‘ things in the morning. 

After the guys had gone to work, the phone rang and I answered, “This is Steve Sloane.”

“Steve, it’s Pat.  I was able to get hold of my sister and they will be arriving tomorrow afternoon.  I told her that we had made arrangements for them to stay in your house.  The funeral service is scheduled for Monday, so they should be gone after that.”

“No problem.  We can handle anything for a short time.”

“Don’t be too sure of it.  You haven’t met my Dad, Abe and the six kids.  Even Shawn and Shane don’t like them.”

It was a quiet night and I was able to get some writing done.  Pat was talking business on the phone and Shane and Tommy were playing a game.  I heard Shane say, “Tommy, be ready to meet some real brats, tomorrow, when my cousins get here.  They’ll be into everything and leave a mess wherever they go.”

I didn’t let on I had heard the conversation, but when Pat and I were in the bedroom, I mentioned what I had heard Shane say.

“Steve, Shane feels the same way I do.  Denise and Abe have no discipline over their children.  Everything Denise tries to do, Abe and Dad undo.  The kids are going to grow up like their Dad and Granddad, thinking that everyone should wait on them and satisfy their wants.”

I laughed, “We’ll just have to have our boys straighten them out.”

On Saturday morning, we had finished breakfast when the phone rang.  Nathan answered, “This is Nathan.  … Oh hi, Travis.  … Sure, I'll come pick you up and you can get the rest of your things.  How’s it going to work out having two men telling you what to do? … Well it won’t be long until your Uncle Seth can get his driver’s license back. We'll be there in about thirty minutes.”

Don and Mike had made up their minds that they were going to finish their thank you notes, so they would be done.  Pat and his two boys were running around making arrangements for the funeral and getting the boys suits.

It was almost four o’clock when the phone rang, Tommy answered, “This is Tommy. … Excuse me, sir, Sheriff Kincaid isn’t here.  Would you like to speak to Mr. Sloane?”

This is Steve Sloane.”

“Sloane, this is Abe Tuesdale.  Pat said that you would have someplace where we could stay, for the weekend.”

“Yes, Mr. Tuesdale, we’ve cleaned our house in town, for you to stay in while you’re here.  Where are you now, so I can meet you and take you to the house?”

“We’re in the parking lot of the Super Walmart.  I’m driving a white Toyota Sequoia van with Illinois plates.  There’s a guide post that says H-1”

“I’ll be there in twenty five minutes.”

“Where’s Pat anyway?”

“He’s making the arrangements for his Mother’s funeral.  I’m leaving now.”

I really didn’t want to leave Tommy alone, but he insisted, “Dad, I’m sure that Shane and Dad Kincaid will be here shortly.  We’ll cook some of the fish that we caught earlier, and we can feed the visitors, since they haven’t had time to buy food.  We can see if they are as bad as Shane said.”

When I arrived at the guidepost H-1, I found the Sequoia, but there was no one in it.  I waited ten minutes and was about to leave when an older man came stumbling up with a cigar hanging out of his mouth, “Are you Steve Sloane?”

“Yes, where are the others.  I said I would be here in twenty five minutes, and I’m here.  If I’m going to take you anywhere, you'd better get the others here and now.  I don’t know you people and I don’t owe you anything, I’m only doing this as a favor for a friend.”

“Don’t get huffy with me, young man.”

“Fine, you people can find a motel to stay in.  I owe you nothing and I have no obligation to let you stay in my home.”

I started to walk away.  The man grabbed my shirt, and I pushed him away.  “I assume you’re Mr. Kincaid.  If you ever touch me or any of my people, I’ll have you in county facilities faster than you can get rid of that cigar which you are going to do, now.  My sons are allergic to smoke, or even the smell of tobacco.  When was the last time you brushed your teeth?  You smell like a barnyard.”

Mr. Kincaid was temporarily at a loss for words, “Listen, you asshole, I don’t know who you think you are, but you don’t have the right to tell me what to do.”

“If you’re going to stay in my house, I have every right to tell you what the rules are.  Since your family can’t seem to follow directions, then they can sleep in the van, for all I care.”

I heard a voice, “When is that man going to come show us to the house.  I’m starving.  I hope they have lots of food.”

I turned around, “Young man, if you’re talking about staying at my house, we didn’t promise to provide you food.  We only promised you a place to sleep.  We are going to feed you tonight, but other than that, you are on your own for food.   Now if you will get into your van, I’ll take you to the house where you’re staying while you’re here for the funeral.  As soon as you can get dressed to do activities on the lake, we’ll leave for the house on the lake where you will be having dinner tonight.”

The lady asked, “Where is Pat?  Why didn’t he meet us?” 

“He has been busy making arrangements for his mother’s funeral service.”

“Why didn’t he wait for us so we could have an input?”

“Why should he have waited?  I understand that you have had practically nothing to do with your mother since you were a teenager, assuming that you’re Denise.”

Her husband clenched his fists, “How dare you talk to my wife like that?”

“Let’s just forget the offer of free housing while you’re here.  You people don’t seem to realize that you aren’t the king and queen and royalty of the Earth.  It was nice knowing you.”

The youngest boy, who was about Tommy’s age, grabbed my sleeve, “Please mister, we don’t have any money to pay for a motel.  We haven’t eaten since breakfast this morning when we just had some toast.  Can you please get us something to eat?”

I put my arm around the young boy, “I don’t suppose you have a name?”

“Of course I have a name, it’s Jimmy Tuesdale.  What’s yours?”

“My name is Stephen Sloane.  Tell your relatives to get in their car, immediately, or I’m leaving without them.  Why don’t you ride with me so they don’t take off without you?”

“Mister Sloane, they’ll probably take off without me, for sure.  They don’t like me.  They’re jealous because I’m the only one who is good in school.  The rest of them think school is just a game.”

To be continued...

Editor's Notes:  Fee Fi Fo Fum, I smell a case of AAKD, here. Grin.  I like Jimmy. He is the only one in that stinkin' family, with any manners whatsoever.  He deserves better than what those creeps are giving him. 

I think he would be a fine candidate for inclusion in the family.  I guess we will just have to wait and see if he decides to stay with us. Grin.

I have a feeling that the jerks are going to have a rude awakening, when it comes to mooching from their hosts, and anyone else around there.

Greed and snottiness doesn't get people very far, with people who give love and help when it is needed.  I definitely see trouble brewing with these low life scumbags.

I am ready for the next exciting chapter.

Darryl AKA The Radio Rancher

Posted: 01/21/11