You Ain’t Santa Claus
by: E Walk

(© 2009-2010 by the Author)
 

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Chapter 49 

Who’s the Nincompoop?

The grocery shopping experience was surreal.  It was amazing to watch Nathan manipulate Stefan and Karl and help them make some good decisions.  By the end of the shopping trip, all three Sorenson boys were reading labels and making comparisons between brands and prices.  It took forever for us to get the things that Nathan thought we needed.  As we were going to the check out counter, Erik commented, “We didn’t buy any meat or frozen dinners.”

I nodded, “We can get the meat and eggs that we need at Belle Monte, since we raise our own beef, pigs and chickens.  Besides, we eat most of our dinners at Homebase.  We’ll have to show you around the entire spread, this weekend, if you the guys don’t do it before then.”

As we were riding back to the Little House, Erik chuckled, “Dr. Kirk, I can’t get over the fact that your dad is a minister and he isn’t upset that you and Doctor Dan live together.  Will you tell me sometime how it is that you and Doctor Dan came to have Nate and Ryan as part of your family.”

“How much detail would you like.  Put it like this, when I found Nate, I was dressed as Santa Claus.”

I heard three voices saying, “You were what?”

Nate answered, “Daddy was dressed as Santa, and was working at the mall.  I went to see what it was like to talk to Santa and he kidnapped me, and we went and kidnapped Ryan at the old warehouse where we were living.”

Erik turned to Nate in the back seat, “Nate, is that really true?”

“Yep.  After he kidnapped us, he took us home to the condo and stuck us in the washing machine because we smelled so bad.”

Karl giggled, “Nate, now I know your not telling the truth.  You don’t put people in washing machines.”

“Well, he did make us take a bath?”

The discussion was ended, because we arrived at the Little House.  The three Sorenson boys unloaded the groceries while Nate and I put them away.  Dan came from the bedroom in his briefs to help us.  I looked at him and licked my lips.   “Where’s Ryan?

“He’s lying in bed reading.  He wants you to come talk to him.  I’ll help the guys.”

As I was going up the stairs, I asked, “Has Nels called yet?”

“Not yet.”

I knocked before I went into Ryan’s room even though the door was open.  “Hi Daddy.  Daddy what’s going to happen to Dieter, Erik, Stefan and Karl?”

I sat down on Ryan’s bed, “Son, I wish I knew.  We’ll have to see what Doctor Richfield says.”

Ryan came and sat beside me, “I guess there is no way we could adopt them, is there?”

“Ryan, I’m not sure that the Sorenson boys would want that.”

“Daddy, I don’t want them to have to go live in a home like me and Nate did.”

“Son, I can promise you that that ain’t going to happen.  I’m sure your Uncle Bruce won’t let anything bad happen to the boys.  Doctor Dad and I will do whatever we can to make sure they’re well taken care of.”

Ryan hugged me, “Thanks, Daddy.”

I kissed him after he crawled under the sheet and blanket, “Goodnight, son.”

“Goodnight, Daddy.”

As I was going down the stairs, I met the three ten year olds, “I’ll come say goodnight after you’re in bed.”

“Daddy, save yourself a trip up the stairs and kiss us goodnight now.”

I did as Nate suggested.  I watched as the three went up the stairs and thought, ‘Our eldest son is growing up.’

When I reached the first floor, Dan was sitting on the sofa watching television.  I looked around, “Where’s Erik?”

“He’s in the game room, doing his homework.  He was going to work at the game table.  He wants us to let him know if Nels calls.”

The phone rang.  I answered, “This is Kirk Richter.”

“Kirk, its Nelson.  Don’t let the boys watch television if at all possible.  The media is having a field day delving into Lars’ sordid background.  It’s as if they are out to identify all the people he was cavorting with.  I can’t believe that I let myself be fooled by the asshole.  How much do the guys know?” 

“The three youngest only know that their Dad died and there was no outward reaction when I told them.  What’s going to happen now?  Is there anything that we can do to assist you?  Let me put Erik on with us.”

I went to tell Erik to pick up the phone in the game room and he was already standing behind me, “Erik come sit down.  It’s Nels.”

I pushed the speaker button, “Nels, the phone is on speaker.  Dan and Erik are sitting beside me.  Why don’t you explain what you’ve been able to arrange, so far?”

“The body was released this afternoon about four o’clock.  It is at the crematorium.  I put an obituary in the paper announcing Lars death and that private burial services would be held at a later date.  I talked to his family and they want nothing to do with the arrangements.  They even went so far as to ask not even be mentioned in any notices.  It was a very short obit, since I knew so little about his background.  I did ask that any memorial funds be designated for an education fund for his four sons.”

Erik was crying, “Dad Nels, why did you do that.  If that man was such a jerk, no one will send any money.  I’m not surprised about his family wanting nothing to do with his funeral arrangements.”

Nels started to talk, “I’m so glad that the four guys are not here.  The media people have been trying desperately to find out where they are.”

I had a sudden thought, “The only way they could find out where they are would be through Erik’s old school.  They faxed a copy of Erik’s records to the high school today.  Erik, did Pete Long give an address for the school.”

Erik shook his head, “I don’t remember either of us giving an address.  Mr. Long said that a formal request would be sent requesting the copy of the record.  The only thing that was given was the fax number.”

Nels asked, “What about the other three boys.”

I answered, “Nels, they’re being home schooled, so there has been need to request records on them as of yet.”

Nels sighed, “Good. Erik, be alert if someone should approach you and try to talk to you about your Dad.  Now, may I speak to Dan about a medical issue?”

Before I turned off the speaker I teased, “Erik, I know when we’ve been told to disappear.  Let’s go get drunk.”

I followed Erik to the game room and sat beside him, “Erik, is school going to be as easy as you thought?

“Dr. Richter, I’m probably going to be the person who looks like a nincompoop.  The people here are already several chapters ahead of where I was in Minnesota, and I haven’t even been to my morning classes yet.”

I grinned, “At least you have three hick farm boys and Dan and I here to help you, if you need help.  I suggest that you wrap it up and get ready for bed.  Remember, if you need or want to talk, Dan and I are good listeners.”

Erik looked at me, “Dr. Richter, why couldn’t you have been our father?”

“Probably because I never had sex with a woman.”

Erik started to laugh, “You’re not serious, are you?”

“I’m very serious.  I came close one time, but I was so repulsed by the idea that I put my dick in my pants and zipped my fly, and that was last time I even thought about it.”

Erik was laughing when we arrived on the first floor.  Dan asked, “What’s so funny?”

Erik giggled, “Your husband was telling me about the first time he thought about having sex with a woman.  You’ll have to enlighten me about your early sex life.”

Dan grinned, “I’m too shy to talk about sex.  Erik, I have a question.  When we were talking to Nels, you mentioned that you were not surprised that your Dad’s family wanted nothing to do with your father’s funeral arrangements.  Would you share why?”

“Dad’s dad is a minister.  The problem started when our parents divorced.  When we moved in with Dad Nels, he and the rest of the family totally refused to talk to Dad, or us boys, for that matter.  It was as if we were the scourge of the planet.  Unfortunately, he isn’t a minister like Dr. Kirk’s dad must be.  In fact, I didn’t like him before he disowned us.  He considered himself to be better than everyone else.”

I wasn’t liking what I was hearing, “Erik, where is it that your grandparents live?”

“They live in Minneapolis.  His church is one of the biggest in the city.  Like I told you earlier, our parents weren’t big in church and that was another bone of contention with the rest of Dad’s family since they all worship the Reverend Olaf Sorenson.”

I stood, “We need to get to bed.  Morning is going to come soon.  We’ll have to finish this discussion tomorrow.”

When Dan and I were cuddled in bed, he squeezed me, “Kirk, don’t become too attached to Erik.  More importantly, don’t let him become too attached to you.”

I sat up, “Dan, are you saying you wouldn’t want Erik to be our son?”

Dan pulled me back against him, “Kirk, there is no way that we can handle four more boys, at this time.  We’re still adjusting to having Ryan and Nathan take over our lives.  Remember, we've been Dads for less than three months.”

“Dan, I realize that.  I’m just concerned about Erik.  He really is a neat young man and at a very fragile age.  I’m not worried about the three younger boys.  They’ll be fine no matter what.”

Dan and I were awakened the next morning by a knock on the door, since we were both decent, I called out, “We don’t need anything today.  Come back tomorrow.”

Erik was laughing, “Sorry if I was interrupting your playtime.  I’ll call the hospital and university and tell them that you will be late today.”

Dan sat up, “Erik, get your ass in here.”

Erik came in bowed, “I was sent by the royal cooks to deliver your coffee and tell you that breakfast would be a formal affair and that you were to wear a tie in addition to your indecent briefs”

Dan threw his pillow at Erik, “Watch it, kid, or I’ll be removing your tongue.  Tell the royal chefs we’ll be down as soon as we can get decent.”

 After Erik had bowed and backed out of the room.  “Damn, that kid is making it difficult to not become attached to him.”

 When Dan and I arrived in the eating area, the five guys were chowing down.  Nate pointed, “Dads, there are English muffins and fresh fruit.  Would you like some cereal, too?”

Both Dan and I declined the offer of cereal.  We were about finished eating when the intercom was activated.  “Little House, this is Homebase. Is the quack doctor taking us to school or are we riding the bus?”

Nate went to the intercom, “ We ain’t got no quack doctors here.  Our Dad will take you, if we can get Erik moving.  We’re finishing eating right now, and they should be there in ten minutes.”

Erik and Dan both hugged me as they departed.  I watched as they crawled into Dan’s car and thought to myself, ‘I bet that Erik is going to question Dan about his early sexual experiences.’

The seminar class was even more crowded than it had been.  Surely they hadn’t admitted more people into the class.  We started the seminar with me talking about Quinn.  “Ladies and gentlemen, our young friend is talking a storm and he has been temporarily assigned to the gentleman who found him.”

That prompted all sorts of questions.  One young woman stood, “Dr. Richter, isn’t it highly unusual for single man to be awarded custody of a young boy.  He’ll grow up with no concept what a woman’s role is in today’s society.”

I shook my head no, “Miss, that’s not going to happen, in Quinn’s case.  There are two very strong women role models for him.  It is my opinion that Quinn has been placed where he should be.  He has two grandmothers who are already doting on him.  He’s only five, for heaven's sake and his new grandparents wanted to buy him a new car.  The kicker to this whole mess is that his so called elusive uncle offered to sell him for $50,000.00 in front of a judge and a representative of the Children’s Protection Agency.”

A young man stood, “Dr. Richter, these stories which you have told us aren’t really true, are they?”

“I’m afraid they are, sir.  I have a new case that I would like each of you who are taking the class for credit to write what you think should happen.  It may be some time before this case is actually resolved.”

I explained in detail what was happening in the Sorenson boys’ case.  It was so quiet while I was talking that you could have heard a pin drop.  The same young man stood and asked, “Dr. Richter, you have to be fabricating these stories.  No one person could possibly be personally involved with all these young people.”

Bruce was there unbeknownst to me and spoke, “Young man, I can assure you that everything Dr. Richter has told you is true.  The class is running late and I have some things that Dr. Richter needs to take care of.”

I looked at the clock and it was almost one o’clock.  A young woman asked, “Who are you, that you can come in and interrupt the class?”

I put up my hand, “That’s Nathan and Ryan’s, Uncle Bruce, whom we’ve discussed earlier.  He’s a lawyer, so there must be a legal matter that I need to take care of.  It’s already one o’clock, so we’ve gone nearly forty five minutes overtime.”

After the class filed out, Bruce looked at me, “College students don’t stay overtime in their classes.  There must be something wrong with you.  We have some business to take care of.”

I looked at Bruce and George, “It’s my charismatic charm that keeps these people sitting quietly in their seats for so long.  I hope that there aren’t too many wet seats for the next class.”

George laughed, “You must be hallucinating.  They were all in a trance and couldn’t move because you were speaking in a monotone.  Would you come get in the car so we can get some lunch and the boss can explain what you need to do?” 

To be continued...

Editor's Notes: I do believe that Erik is becoming part of the family.  Kirk is certainly falling for his charms, and Erik is beginning to feel as if he is really being cared about. 

The younger boys are feeling loved as well, but they haven't had enough rotten treatment to cause them to feel as unloved as Erik has.

I certainly hope we get more chapters soon.

Darryl AKA The Radio Rancher

Posted: 07/16/10