Sexual Awakening
 by: TucsonDaddy

© 2012 by the author

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

I was sitting in my office in one of the chairs when the knock I'd been anticipating sounded on the door.

“Come in,” I said.

Josh, my older son opened the door and said, “Mom told me you wanted to see me.”

“Yes, I do. Please come in, shut the door and sit here with me,” I said indicating the chair next to mine.  He entered, closed the door, and turned to walk toward the chair.

I have to tell you, dear reader, that every time I look at my son, my heart nearly bursts with pride in who he is and what he is becoming. At age fifteen he is all boy. Sturdy, with a body that is turning baby flab into a firm musculature. He looks like he plays hard and plays a lot.

He's no great ball player but he makes up in enthusiasm what he lacks in skills. Can't throw as far as some boys, he tells me, and I tell back to him that there are many who wish they could throw as far as he can.

He has a ready smile and flashing blue eyes that set off his shock of blond hair. The eyes and hair he got from his mom. I'm thinking he'll eventually turn out to be a brunette like me with my light brown hair.

He's not wearing the typical “so what” grin that usually adorns his face but looks more sober and cautious. He sits, turns to look at me, and opens today's conversation with, “So what do you want to see me about, dad,”

“Girls,” I respond.

His eyes light up. “Really?” Then the smile fades. “Oh, you're just kidding, aren't you, dad.” He laughs at his realization of a joke about one of his favorite topics. How do I know it is? When I was fifteen I was beginning to realize girls were more than just a bother. When they think I'm not paying attention I've caught snatches of conversations which usually have “Clarissa,” or “Sharon,” in them.

“This time for real,” I say. “Girls.” Pausing for his comments, I add, “You like to talk about girls, don't you?” A little probing for confirmation of my suspicions.

He nods. His visage remains skeptical. “OK.”

“Good.” I say. “So you tell me. What do you like about girls?”

A smile briefly flickers across his mouth but then returns to more solemn. “Welllll,” he begins dragging out the word. “I guess I don't know,” he admits.

“You don't know but you are aware that something inside makes you want to be closer to this girl or that one. Just some feeling you can't explain. Is that right?” He nods.

“That's the feeling you're going to have for the rest of your life. Today it starts with some cute girl in your class and tomorrow it will be the pretty woman you want to marry.” He's captured now. As my words flow, he nods in confirmation. “Something inside you wants to look at a girl. Then you want to talk to her. When she responds you want to touch her hand.” I pause again. “Is that something like the way you feel about girls now?” He's nodding and even grinning.

“Yeah, it is. There's this one girl, Clarissa, who's been looking at me.” He blushes slightly.

“That happened to me many times when I was starting to get interested in girls. Suddenly all the girls looked cute! I didn't know what to do about my feelings. Except for one thing.”

“What, dad? What did you do?”

“I masturbated,” I admitted. Now he blushed too, his face turning a bright red. “When I was home alone and every night, I'd have thoughts about a favorite girl, Julie, and get very aroused, horny, so that I could masturbate until I ejaculated.”

“Really? You used to jack.... I mean, masturbate thinking about girls?”

“Son, I have to tell you that I still jack off.”

He looked at me curiously. “But you're married. You and mom can, uh, well, you know.”

“True and I like making love with your mom a lot. But sometimes when I see a pretty woman who's dressed so that she shows off her body so nicely, I get a feeling that I'd like to see her naked. All men like to look at a naked women even when we are married and in love with our wives.”

“So that's why I like to look at girls and think about seeing them naked?” his face was still pink but he was interested in this idea.

“I've told you I like to masturbate or jack off. Do you want to tell me that you do?”

He nodded. “Yeah, I do. Three or four times a day.”

I laughed at his admission. “Three or four times a day?” I acknowledged. “You must be one horny stud!” I clapped him on his shoulder; he grinned as though disclosing some universal truth.

“OK, Let me ask you, suppose you and your Clarissa could get off in your room, say, and she let you kiss her?” He was grinning at this mental image of him and a girl alone, in his room, and she's letting him kiss her. “Do you know what to do next?”

“I'd kiss her, dad.” he offered simply.

“Yeah, but a kiss is not just a kiss. The kind of a kiss are you going to give her tells her that you want to do more than just kiss, right? What else do you want to do with this cute girl who's letting you kiss her on the mouth?”

“A long kiss, I guess. I don't know.”

“But she does. She's let you take her to your room, and be alone with her. She thinks that you want to go further than just a kiss. In fact, when you do kiss her, she's excited knowing you'll want to do more.”

“Really? All that in just a kiss?”

“It's the whole scene: alone, kissing. A girl thinks a lot about a special boy wanting to touch her. When you have privacy, the first step to sex, yes, sex, is to touch her body with your mouth on her mouth.”

“I don't know what I'd do!” he exclaimed frustrated.

“What would you like to do?” I paused to let him grasp this idea. “Then you kiss her again while you're sitting on the bed. You whisper that you really like her and like kissing her. So you keep telling her how pretty she is and how much you want to be with her. Convince her she's special.”

“Uh huh,” he says somewhat dazed by this revelation. “That's it?”

“You want to rip her clothes off, see her pretty body, and suck on her nipples, touch her pussy, and want to stick your hard penis into her cunt.” I glanced briefly at his crotch, at the bulge displayed there with this erotic build up. Then to his face. He was grinning. “Really, just like that? Rip her clothes off?”

“That's an oversimplification, Josh. You know it. With your Clarissa, you might not even get under her bra to feel her breasts but she'll let you touch them  with her clothes on. It all depends on how far she wants to go. But it's up to you, the man to dictate what you expect by your touches and words. Both of you will know what you want to do.”

“OK, dad. I think I got it. Thanks for the advice.”

“You're welcome, Josh,” I responded.

“There is one more thing I'd like to talk about,” I say bracing myself for a potential unpleasant response.

“Yeah?” his tone more a statement than a question.

“I checked your school health curriculum and found that you've either had or will get a lecture on homosexuality.”

Josh blushes again, appearing slightly agitated. “We had that last week.”

“What did the teacher tell you about it?”

Still slightly pink, “He told us what it is and what homo's do for sex,” he nearly stuttered out. Maybe this wasn't going to work. He might not be able to open up on this.

“Do you have any questions about what he said?”

“Uhm... Maybe.”

“You can always talk to me about anything.”

“He said homo's are born that way. Nothing they can do about it. He said that sometimes kids figure out they are gay even when they are very young but are afraid to tell anybody out of fear. He said there's a lot of homo.... homo.... homophobia around.”

“Some of that is true. First kids aren't born that way. To be born with any characteristic like skin color, freckles, eye or hair color, you have to have a gene for it. There is no gay gene. Many believe like your teacher.”

“Then what makes somebody turn gay?”

“We don't know but I have my own theory about it.”

“What is your idea?” he asked interest sounding in his voice.

“Well, I think all men are born with the desire to be gay. You see the way boys play together before puberty then after, something in our brains starts making boys interested in girls. But the interest in being homo never goes away. Some men wait all their lives to come out as gay.”

I glanced down at his crotch, the bulge was still there. When I looked at his face, I noticed that just for a brief instant, his eyes brushed by my crotch where my own cock had expanded.

To my surprise, Josh looked directly at me and ask, “Dad, did you ever do anything gay when you were like my age?” He blushed at his audacity but kept the direct gaze.

“I did. Many times. I touched and played with other boys many times. Sometimes we just jacked off and other times we got naked and sucked each others cocks.” I gasped at my own audacity in disclosing my homosexual beginning as a youth.

His mouth was open, eyes wide. Apparently I'd hit the right tone and opening. “You did? Dad! You sucked a cock?”

“Yes, many times with my friends. Sometimes with their older brothers and brothers' friends. Yeah, many times.”

“Uhm.... Did... Did....” he paused trying to make his mouth form the forbidden words.”

“Did I like it?”

“Yeah, did you like having a boy's cock in your mouth? Did you like the taste? Did he cum in your mouth?”

I laughed softly. “So many questions but I'll answer them all.” The bulge in his pants seemed to have grown. Or was it my imagination? “One day while Harold and I were naked and feeling each others cocks and balls, he said, 'If you suck mine, I'll suck yours.' So I did. I got on my knees and took his hard cock in my mouth and sucked him. I liked it. I liked the way it felt, so stiff yet velvety smooth skin. I liked the way it tasted and the way it smelled.”

“My gawd,” he whispered. “My dad a cock sucker.”

“I did it many times with four different boys. My first experience with an adult homosexual man was when I was 16. I sucked his cock, he sucked mine and later when he got hard again, I let him fuck my bottom.”

He gaped at me like I was some foreign man who had suddenly replaced me in this room. “Hello,” I said waving my hand before him.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. I'm awake. I can't quite put all this together. Finding out that you've done queer stuff with boys and a man. I ALWAYS thought you were a straight guy but now....” he let the words dribble out.

“Josh, I'm a bisexual. I found out that I like to suck and fuck boys and men, I like women too. I am still very much in love with your mom and would never think of having sex with any other woman.” I left off the part that I was still having sex with men.

“Am I bisexual too?” he asked cautiously. “Or am I a homo too?”

“Those are questions only you can answer. So let me ask a few questions and give some advice.”

“OK, he scooted forward in his chair as if ready to hang on my every word. The movement caused his pants to stretch across his crotch which emphasized his erection even more. It looked quite large.

“Dad? Are you looking at me here?” he asked with a slight smirk. “Are you checking me out?” Then he burst out laughing. “I can't believe you're looking at my cock!”

“No worse than your roving eyes,” I retorted. “Did you like what you saw when you checked me out?”

He grinned and blushed. I'd caught him red-handed or perhaps red-eyed. “Yes this talk about my homo past has made me horny. Guess it had the same effect on you.” He nodded.

“So let me ask you, have you and a friend gotten naked together, jacked off together or touched each other?”

He looked away and said, “No, no, and no.”

“Do you want to touch a boy's cock and suck it?”

“Yes, and yes.”

“How long have you wanted to suck cock?”

I started feeling funny when I went to the bathroom in school and some boy next to me pulled out his cock, just hold it there then start pee. I liked seeing his cock. Sometimes the boy would look over at mine. I felt good knowing he wanted to see mine.”

“OK, this calls for a plan. How to get your friend to get naked with you. Here's my suggestion. Who's the boy you'd most like to suck his cock?” I asked rather blatantly getting the desire out.

“Freddy.”

“Freddy Johnson? His dad is Hank?”

“Yeah, that's him. You know his dad?”

“I do. We both belong to a club and play cards together.”

“OK, what do I do?”

“Invite him for a sleep over this Friday. He should come over right after school. I'll make sure your mom is gone. You invite him to go swimming. When you both get in, take off your swim suit, throw it on the deck and say, “It's more fun to swim naked. Why don't you take yours off too.” He will probably do it. Start playing games like dunking each other. When you have the chance, grope his hard cock a little. Then stop, claiming you're tired and hug him. When he hugs you back, you'll feel his hard cock against your belly and yous against his.”

Josh was drinking in the words, changing them to images and becoming overwhelmed with the idea of hugging a naked boy.

“You like that?”

“Uh huh,” he replied. “That's exciting.” The bulge in his pants seemed to be throbbing; mine was.

“Pull him to the side of the pool, get up on the edge, and invite him to suck you.”

“What if he refuses?”

“At that point, he probably won't. But you want to suck his too so you can trade places.”

He was sitting in the chair, eyes almost glazed. “I want to do that so much.”

I leaned over to him, placed my hand on his knee. “What you really need with all this overload of information, is to jack off.”

His eyes met mine. “You do too, don't you, dad.”

Our eyes connected, understanding passed between as we simultaneously nodded. “You mean here?” he asked.

“I was thinking of a shower,” I said.

“Shower? Together?” His eyes seemed to glow with desire.

“Yes. See each other naked and erect and jack off together. A real father-son moment.”

We rose together. I took his hand and led him from the study to my bedroom. Closing the door, I turned to see that he was already half undressed. I duplicated his speed so that in less than a minute, we were naked and face to face. I pulled him to me to wrap my arms around him.

There is something magical in the feeling that encompassed me as we stood holding each other, feeling the delightfully erotic sense of oneness. A true dad-son bonding. Releasing him, I stepped back to congratulate him on his nice set of equipment.

“You have a nice cock too, dad.” His hand reached out tentatively toward it. Looking up at me, I nodded granting him permission to touch my aching prick. His hand was shaking slightly; his fingers closing around my shaft. “It's so hard!' He squeezed it. “I can't even make a dent in it.”

The ice was broken; the line crossed. He began to stroke me, lost in this moment as was I. Was I crazy? Letting my own son take my penis and stroke it!

He looked up at my face and said almost breathlessly, “Dad, will you stroke mine too?” I nodded. Reaching down to take his smaller yet equally hard cock into my hand, I pulled back his foreskin. He groaned in pleasure.

“We should not be doing this!” the rational part of my mind was screaming. I was in an emotional nose dived unable to pull out. The die was cast and Josh sensed it. He dropped to his knees and pulled my cock head toward his mouth. With a gasp I stopped him. “No, Josh. Your first gay sex should be with your friend. Not with me, your dad.”

He looked up at me. “Please! I want to suck you!” I shook my head and pulled him to his feet then looked him directly in his eyes. “I'd like you to do that but I'm afraid you'd turn to me for sex. You need to experience what it's like to give a blow job to Freddy. Maybe.... Maybe once you've settled on your sexuality, we might... Well that's not today. We hugged again. Raging hard ons pressed between us.

“Let's take that shower and see who can shoot the farthest.” I pulled him with me to the shower. Opening the door, I turned on the water. Silence reigned between us, my mind stuck back in that moment as my own son was about to close his lips around my raging head. I felt Josh move passed me into the shower where he adjusted the temperature.

The water felt good as it poured down on my head . “Ready, dad?” said Josh with a grin. I returned his grin and took my cock into my fist. “Go!” he said signaling the start of an new tradition.

END

OR IS IT A NEW BEGINNING?

Posted: 07/13/12