Coach Assistant

By: Tim
(© 2015 by the author)

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

Chapter 19 

“Come in Dad”, I said.

“Are you sure? Or would you rather to talk with Alexei now?  We can do this later.”

“No, as I said and you heard me, dad, we need to talk.  I was only waiting for you to come to let me know you are ready.”

“Well I better leave then”, said Alexei.  “If either of you need talk to me, let me know.”

We nodded to him to let him know we appreciated his offer and he left the room. During my talk with Alexei I had moved from my desk to the bed.  Just sitting there on the edge of it I looked at my Father.

He came towards me and looked at me without saying anything.  

“May I sit down next to you, Nick?”

“Yes Of course, that’s fine by me.”

Dad sat down beside me and we stayed like that, quiet for a few minutes, neither of us knowing where to start, just looking into space in front of us.

 I was waiting for him to start, but when he did I was still a little surprised. 

“Nick, I’m sorry how I reacted downstairs but I just was not sure what to say.” 

“That’s fine Dad, it wasn’t something you expected to hear.”

 “No it’s not fine Nick, even while I was surprised by what you told me I could have reacted in more positive way.”

‘Mmmm, I …...”

“No wait a second”, Dad interrupted me, “Let me have my say before you respond. Otherwise we will just keep interrupting each other.  I think I have hurt you twice this evening.  While I was reading the newspaper it suddenly became clear to me what the reason was that you walked into the kitchen so suddenly.  I never intended to hurt you with the remarks I made then.  I know that was not the thing you wanted to hear from me this evening.  I am glad you told me and that you were open about it, so I guess that you have kept your promise about being frank to me in the future.  I am glad you trust me enough to let it me know, but I have to be open and honest with you too.  I am really glad that you found some one to love, even if it is a boy. You love him don’t you?” 

“Yes Dad, there is no doubt in my heart about that.”

“Ok, I had a little talk with David and Francis when you left to study.  No don’t worry”, he said quickly when he saw my frightened expression. 

“Francis is still downstairs.  I needed to know for sure that Francis didn’t force himself upon you.  I was afraid that he somehow took advantage of you.  It is not that I don’t trust you, but the way it went this evening made me ask him that.  I know that is not being totally honest with you, so I had to ask that question of you instead of accusing Francis of something he didn’t do.  The other thing I talked about with Francis was the fact that I rather want you two to have separate places to sleep.” 

“But Dad, that means he has to sleep on the couch.”

 “Yes, I know, but it’s only for a few days, until Alexei has left for home; then he can sleep in the guestroom. It is not that I don’t trust you two to do responsible things, but I just want to make sure that you are pretty clear about your own feelings before going into too this deeply.”

 “But I really love him Dad. I am sure of that.”

 “I know you are son, but sometimes things happen because you’re listening only to you hormones and not to your braine. Especially while you are in love.”

“I know what I’m doing Dad and you can trust me to be responsible.  Haven’t I always done the right thing, being responsible?” 

“Yes, I know you have been Nick, but I still want to play it safe . You have always been such a responsible boy that I know I can trust you, but still I feel a little unease with this situation. You must understand that I would be totally against it if Kate were to move in with David because she had a fight with her parents.  I would cetainly want her to go to a girl friend to stay there instead of moving in with us. I understand that, in the situation Francis faces, I can’t do that because it would mean he would have to explain why he is fighting with his parents. So I will let him stay here.” 

“Thanks Dad, that means a lot to me.”

 “I know it does Nick, and I am pleased with the way you and David handled things yesterday when Francis came to you for help.  I am proud of the fact that my sons know what is the right thing to do. But that doesn’t mean that I am completely at ease with the idea of you sharing a room, so I just want to ask you to have some patience with me.”

 “Well as long as Francis can stay I’m sure I can be patient with you.”

“ I just want to tell you something about the first time I felt in love. Maybe you can see why I am so careful now with you.”

 Wow!  My Dad never told me anything about how he met my mother and other stuff, so now maybe he is really trying to open up to me.

 “It started when I was 18 years old.  I had been friends with a guy named Peter for a few years and I visited his place quite frequently.  Peter had two sisters, one younger one and one older one. The younger one had been home most of the times while I was visiting, but the older one had been to college and came back only during vacations. During that year of my 18th birthday suddenly it struck me what a beautiful girl she was.  I started to try and be around her house as much as possible.  Somehow she noticed me, something I never had happen befor.  One evening while I was waiting for Peter to come home from his summer job she cornered me on the couch and started to touch me a little more then I expected.  She kissed me and tried to unzip my pants. Just then Peter came walking in and started to yell.  First at me, then at his sister.  I quickly got up and left the house not knowing if I could face Peter again.”

"So did you see him or her again?” 

“Yes, two days later Peter came over and asked me if I wanted to come to his place.  I did and we did what we usually had done.  Nothing was ever said about what happened. .  Later I saw his older sister and we chatted a little. She kissed me goodnight when she left. The kiss was something more then I expected, so I really felt for her at that moment.  Peter just looked while it happened and when she left he said: ‘I am sorry how I reacted but I am fine with it now.’  I didn’t know why he was fine with it now but during that summer I went completely crazy over his sister until the last week of the holiday.  His sister was not going back to the college and she would stay to live there and would go to a local college.  In that last week, she came in to Peter’s room  while we were playing a game of chess.  She walked in and said: ‘well look, there they are, my two lover boys.’  I had been making out with her for a while by then and I had even fucked her once. I didn’t know what she meant by two lover boys but I looked at Peter and saw that he was red with embaressement .  “You didn’t tell him, did you Peter?”

“ Tell what?”  I asked Peter. Then she told me that she had been playing around also. She sat down between us and before I knew it she started to kiss Peter and me.  I was totally surprised by it but also got very horny while she was kissing me.”

We were looking at each other while Dad told me about this experience and somehow I couldn’t believe he was telling me this.

“Well, to make a long story short Nick, she started to fool  around with the two of us, but also wanted us  to play with each other.  Even more, she wanted me to fuck her brother while he was fucking her.  I still can’t believe that I did what she wanted, but being in love with her made me completely vulnerable to what she wanted. I simply didn’t think about the consequesnces;  I just did what she wanted.   It ruined my friendship with Peter because he didn’t want to talk with me after that, and his sister didn’t want anything to do with me either, because she couldn’t be seen with a younger boy.  So I lost heavily because of falling in love and being in a love.  It took me about 2 years to fall in love again.  Do you see now why I want you to be careful to not get carried away too quickly with this?  It’s not that I don’t want you to fall in love, I’m just afraid that you will get hurt.”

“I understand Dad; I know you don’t want me to get hurt, but you have had your lesson and I need to learn for my self.  There is no way that I can learn from you’re lessons.  I need those kinds of experiences myself to learn and grow from them.”

“I know son, but that doesn’t mean I don’t worry  about you, because I love you .”

 “I know you do Dad, and I love you too.”

With that, we hugged each other and, when he tried to let go, I just couldn’t.  I needed to be against his chest to feel his love for me.  I had doubted that love so often lately and I had been in so much pain that all kinds of feelings came flowing over me.  I lost it and started to cry.  We just sat there, me with my head on his chest and his hands stroking my hair as he tried to comfort me.

As I started to calm down, he just pushed me away slightly and looked into my face.

“What is this all about, Nick?”

“Well, I think I just lost control after all that has happened this evening, dad.”

“Don’t worry about it, son.  I love you whatever happens in the future, don’t forget that.  I just have a few more questions I hope you’re willing to answer for me.  Trust me, I’m not asking them because I don’t trust you.  I just want to try to understand.”

“Ok Dad, ask away.”

“How long have you known you have feelings for guys instead of girls?”  I looked at him and backed off a little more.  “If you don’t want to answer, that’is fine by me, but if you can it would make me feel more at ease with it.”

 “To be honest Dad, I didn’t think about it all that much. It was something quite normal for me over all the years looking at boys instead of girls. It only started to get clear for me a year or so back, when we left Mom.  Moving made me realise that I wasn’t going to see some of those guys I had been wondering about and I was afraid of getting new friends; friends I wanted to talk to about how I felt.  But it became clear to me that I was gay when Francis walked into the gymnasium the first time and you introduced him as one of the new gymnasts.  When I look back now I fell in love with him the moment I saw him. His eyes, his hair……….”

I must have started to dream away because I felt a small push on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry. Dad.” I said while I felt my face become red.

“Don’t worry, Nick.  I am quite aware that you’re in love with Francis.  The way you went off into your own world when you started to talk about him tells me all I need to know.  But still, I hope you understand my concerns and I would like to ask you to go further slowly while he’s staying here.”

“Well, I can’t tell you what I want for the two of us, but just being together is all I want at this moment.”

“So, would you have told me if Francis hadn’t had a fight with his parents?”

“To be honest, dad, no, not right now.  Francis didn’t want our relationship to be a secret for long because of his experience last year.  So I guess I would’ve told you within a few months, but what happened between Francis and his parents just made this happen more quickly.”

“Well I am glad you told me.  You must give me time to get used to it, but I will soon, and as for Francis, well he is a nice boy.  I’m glad you fell in love with someone with his character”.

 “Thanks Dad.”

“Ok.  Well I better go because I think Francis is waiting anxiously downstairs to talk with you after all that went on tonight.  I just want you to know that if you ever want to talk to me I will be here for you.  I also hope you know you can tell me anything that bothers you.”

 “I know Dad, thank you.”

I hugged him once more and then he stood up and left the room. That was quite an intense conversation.  I could hardly believe that Dad had told me the story he did.  I was glad he came up that night because I’m not sure I could have handled him being quiet for a few days. 

I just laid back on the bed, waiting for Francis to come up, because I knew he wanted to talk about what had happened tonight just as much as I did.

I’m not sure what happened next but, instead of knowing that Francis had come into the room, I felt someone tickling the right hand side of my face.  I opened my eyes and there I was, staring into Francis’s beautiful eyes.  I felt secure and drowned at the same time.  He moved his head a little bit and he started to kiss me.  I slowly opened my mouth and his tongue slipped into my mouth.  We slowly started to suck each other and the feeling of his tongue touching mine gave me electric shocks all through my body.  I knew I had to let go and get some fresh air.

“Hmmm, that was a nice welcome, but I didn’t expect to find you here sleeping.  I thought you’d be waiting up for me.”

I blushed and said, “I’m sorry, Francis, but I know how good you are in waking me up so ….  But really, I’m really sorry.  It seems that I’m more tired then I thought I was.”

“I’m just teasing you, Nick, no problem.  I’m also tired and quite overwhelmed with what happened here tonight.  I’m still not sure whether this is all for real or whether I’m just dreaming.”

 “Oh no, I’m real, no dreams here.”  And with that said I kissed his lips again, making sure I got only a little bit of his upperlip and started to suck on just that. 

“How did the talk with you’re Dad go?  I wasn’t sure he was all right when he left to have talk with you.”

 “He was quite open with me.  He apologised for his first response but he said he was a little taken by surprise with it all.  He told me a little story about what happened when he fell in love the first time and after that we chatted some more.  I know he doesn’t want you to stay in my room because he is afraid we will end up hurting each other by going ahead too fast.”

 “Yes I got that impression from our talk before he went to you.”

“Well he apologised also for the most part of what he said to me. He said he started off with some mistrust but that David and you straightened that out.  He felt bad for asking all he did; he knew he had to trust you.”

 “I can understand Nick, but the way he asked hurt me quite a bit.  From the point of view of a Father I think I can understand.”

“He said we would talk later to see what we where going to do about your situation with you’re parents, but that you could stay at our place for the time being.”

 “I think I’m going to like that a lot”, he said.  He started to kiss me this time and returned my last one while he just sucked on my upper lip.  I tried to back off, but knew that would only hurt, so I just let him go for it.

He kept on going and then I felt his hand slowly moving down from my belly towards my crotch.  I moaned softly when he started to rub my dick through my trousers.

“Hmmm, you’re ready again, aren’t you?” he said softly between sucking my lips.

“Hmmmm, yessssssss …,” I could only whisper … or at least, it was the only thing that made sense.

He was correct: our little kiss, the smell of Francis close by, those magnetic eyes … all helped to get my cock all hard and stiff.

I got to the point where I knew that I couldn’t stop.  I wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue right now, not after what had happened tonight.

I gently pushed Francis away and he looked at me in surprise.

“I’m sorry, Francis, but I’m just not completely in the mood for all this.”

“Well, that’s not what your dick is saying to me,” he replied.  He just squeezed me softly to let me know it was still hard … as if that was at all necessary.

“It’s not that, Francis.  I will always long and lust for you, so I think my cock is just responding to that.  It is just that, after my talk with dad, I still feel his influence and I know he would want us to take things slowly.  So I feel a little conflicted.”

“Hmmm, I have no problem with that, Nick.  We can just lie here and enjoy each other.”

With that, he lay down beside me with his head on my chest and one arm just beside my left-hand leg.

“Hmmm, I love you, Francis,” I said softly while I ran my hand through his hair.

We didn’t hear a moment later when the door opened.

 “Hmmm Alexei, come down here and look.”

 “Oh god, they look so nice and peaceful together.”

 “Yes they do, they deserve a rest together after what happened lately.”

 “You are right about that David, times have been rough for Francis and Nick.” 

“Well let’s hope they will find some peace together and not going to hurt each other.” 

“You can never tell how things will progress David, but so far they seem really totally lost in each other.” 

They backed out of the room and closed the door.

“Can I ask you something Alexei?  Nick seems to be pretty open to you and you said that times were rough for Nick too, lately.  Did he tell you anything about what happened with him last week.” 

Alexei turned to David, saying: “Come on, lets go to my room before I answer that.” 

He didn’t have to answer that question anymore because right there and then I knew Nick told Alexei about it, otherwise he would’nt have invited me to his room.  Alexei closed the door and sat down on the bed.

“I’m not sure how much I can tell you David, only that he opened up to me and told me what happened, but that doesn’t mean I can tell you.  He has to do that himself.”

“I know you can’t say much, I just wanted to know if you suggested that he do something about it.”

  “Yes, I did.  I’m trying to convince him to open up and tell at least Francis or you what happened.  But I’m not sure he’s up to it just yet.  The things that happened during the last few days made him forget about his own trouble; but that will catch up with him.  I probably won’t be around when that happens, so I’m trying to convince him that he must tell some one else, so he can talk with them about it.”

 “Ok, it’s good to know he told at least someone.  I will try and have a chat with him about it tomorrow and see if he will open up to me.”

 “Maybe he will after what happened today.  Ok, I want to hit the sack and I think you need your sleep also.  Goodnight David.” 

“Goodnight Alexei.”  With that David left the quest room.

I tried to move slightly when I woke up but I could hardly move at all.  My dick was hard in my trousers and I felt that I was still wearing my clothes.  I opened my eyes to see what prevented me from moving.  I already knew, of course, that it was Francis, but I didn’t understand how he was keeping me immobile.  When I opened my eyes, I saw him lying with his head on my chest.  His arms were tightly around my middle section, making sure I couldn’t leave.  I just lay there and started to feel really good having him here at my side.  I could smell his odour and liked that very much.  It  made my dick just a little harder.

We seemed to have fallen asleep, still dressed, and we slept heavily.  Normally, I knew, Francis woke up before it was light outside and then would roll over and go back to sleep.  Today, he seemed to just want to lie with me, waiting for me to wake up.  I had a morning hardon and, after a few minutes, I tried to move but I couldn’t because Francis was lying heavily on top of me.  As I looked down at him, I felt my cock harden even more.  I was wearing pretty tight jeans, which didn’t hide a lot.  Francis’s lips were close to my left nipple and he slowly started to lick my nipple through my T-shirt.  I let out a low moan and Francis must have known that I liked what he was doing.  I now knew that Francis was awake but I didn’t move.

He kept flicking his tongue across my nipple, and I tried to move my legs a bit, to get into a more comfortable position.  Francis reached for my crotch and he started slowly to touch the tip of my cock through my jeans.  I moaned again and again.

Then I bent over and whispered in his ear: “If you’re going to continue that, you’d better be prepared for the consequences.”

 “I don’t have to wash your trousers, so I don’t mind” I answered back.

I knew I couldn’t keep this up too much longer, and I tried to get Francis off me.  I didn’t want to shoot in my trousers this morning.  I would rather go into the shower with him and enjoy each other there.  But that was something Dad would oppose, so I just let him go on.  Suddenly he turned around and placed himself over me. He wrapped his legs around mine and I felt his crotch touch mine.  I wasn’t the only one hard at that moment.  I looked into his beautiful eyes.  We started to kiss again and our hips started to move slowly.  I felt again pure electricity shooting through my body.  This was a great experience having Francis on top of me, touching each other although there were two layers of clothes in between.

It didn’t take much longer before I felt my dick start to contract and spurts of cum left my cock.  At the same time, I felt Francis also start to move quickly and moan more loudly as we came together.  I know I screamed a little, but I couldn’t tell much of what else happened.

Then there was a knock on the door.  “When you guys are ready, you’d better come downstairs.  Alexei wants us to leave in about 30 minutes for the extra training this morning.”

“Oops,” I said to Francis.  “Do you think he heard us?”

“I guess he did.  We were quite loud.  It was a good thing that it was David and not your dad.”

“You’re right about that, my love.”

“Well, we’d better get out of bed and go have a shower.  Shall I go first?”

“That’s fine, Francis.  I can do with another few minutes in bed, if you don’t mind.”

“No, I though you might want to stay in bed.”  Francis stood up and, as he did so, he tried to pull me up, too, to at least get me out  of bed before he went to shower.

When we came downstairs, everyone else was having breakfast.  I sat down beside David and Francis took the place beside me.

I looked at my farther and saw a little frown on his face.  I knew he was aware that Francis hadn’t slept on the couch but in my room instead.

We finished breakfast and went together with David and Alexei to the gym.  We’d eventually be joined by James and Mike for a hard practice.  It would be the last one before Alexei left town.  Just before we started, Alexei took me aside into the coachs’ room.

“Nick, I just had to talk to you alone before I leave tomorrow.  I’m not sure if we’ll have another time to be together in private, so I thought I should do this now.  Is that OK with you?”

“Sure, but what would you like to talk about?”

“Well, there is one thing still bothering me.  I know you went through a lot of stuff these last few days, and I think you handled it all pretty well.  What I’m worried about is what will happen after I leave.  Who will you be able to talk to if things start going wrong again?  I just want you to know that, if anything happens, you can always call me to talk to me about it.”

“Thanks, Alexei.  I appreciate that very much.”

“But what I really want you to do is to talk to either Francis or David about what has been happening.  You know you’ll have to tell them eventually anyway.”

“To be honest, Alexei, I planned on telling Francis this weekend but, after what happened with his parents, I’m not sure he can deal with anything more at the moment.”

“You can trust him, Nick.  He is much tougher then you think he is.”

“I’m not sure what I’ll do, but I want to tell him soon.  I have to because I have talked with Mike also about trying to get out of the situation and I need the help of both Francis and David.  I might even need you there.”

“Well, just let me know if you need me and I’ll be there, just like David and Francis will be there for you.”

“Thanks, Alexei,” I said and I hugged him.

“Now, before I leave, I want to talk to you about your gymnastic improvements.  Before I leave tomorrow, I’ll give you a new training schedule which I want you to follow so you can try out at the new trials in a month and see if you can join the team.”

“Do you really think I am ready for that, Alexei?”

“Yes, with the way you’re improving at the moment, I think you can get there and become good enough to compete.  I even think you might get a lot better if you keep this up for a full year.”

I started to blush a little.  “Well, we just have to see how long I can keep up with it.  I’ll only do it as long as it’s fun.”

“When it isn’t fun any more, Nick, you’ll have to stop because then you won’t have the urge to continue.  OK, for now, let’s go out there and see if we can make this work.”

We went to the others and started to have a pretty heavy training.  Alexei kept us going most of the time and he was quite critical about the things we did.  He also gave us a lot of things to think about for the next weeks while he would not be there.

After 2 hours of hard practice we decided to end it for that day and went into the lockers to go change.  Alexei invited us to join him for lunch before going home.

I was starting to get the equipment back into its place when I saw that Mike had returned to help me.  I was not sure he was the person I wanted to talk to at that moment, but I knew I had to talk to him anyway, and soon.

“So Nick, how have you been?  I missed you at school.”

“I’m fine Mike.  I just had to take care of some stuff.”

“How are you and Francis doing?”

That was a kind of strange question coming from him but I knew I had to answer him.

‘We are fine Mike no problem there’.

“Did you tell him already about what happened?”

“No not yet; you will probably know when I do, because I am not sure how he is going to react to it all.”

“Well the doctors are kind of putting the pressure on me again, so we have to think of something quickly.  I think I can hold them off for a few more days, but we need to plan something for next weekend.”

“Ok.  Well I have been thinking about it and I might have found a way to handle it, but I need to discuss it first with Francis.”

“I understand. Do you need more help over here?”

“No, not at the moment; I’m almost done.  Just go back to the others.  I will join you in a moment.”

I sat down on the pommel horse to get my thoughts straightened out. I knew I had to do something; otherwise this would get out of hand.  I was not sure if I could tell Francis anything about it.  I was a little afraid of his reaction. I knew he would help me get out of it, but I just was not sure what he would do with Mike.

When I went back to the group, most were finishing up, so I quickly changed and we went to lunch.  It was hard to not touch Francis, but I knew I had to be careful in public.

After lunch, David, Francis, Alexei and I went back to our house.  We spent the afternoon enjoying each other’s company, knowing that it would be the last day that Alexei was going to be there.  I must say that his friendly, open personality made us feel very comfortable being around this sports celebrity.  It seemed that he genuinely wanted me to become a friend of his.  I wasn’t sure that we had actually gotten to be friends, but depending on how the future went, I thought we could well become friends.

Dad was not home that evening, so we just had the place to ourselves.  I must say that just sitting there with Francis close by … sometimes touching him, feeling his warmth, smelling him … was really neat.  It was so natural, it felt as if we’d done this for years.  Maybe you could even say that, for the first time, I felt safe.  I felt like I had found the part of me that had been missing.

My dad came home before we went to bed, so there was no possibility this time that Francis could join me in my bedroom.  We made a comfortable bed for him on the couch.  While the others went to bed, I stayed behind to say good night to him.

“This has been a great evenin, Francis.  I loved being surrounded by friends, having you beside me and just being ourselves without having to pretend.  You know what I mean, don’t you?”

“Yes, I know what you mean, Nick.  It was really nice to be home, without any arguments.  And you know I really love you for just being you and sharing you with me.”  He started to kiss me.

“But I have one question, Nick: since this morning, you’ve seemed a little preoccupied with something and I just don’t know what it is.”

That was not the way I wanted this good night to go but I knew that I would hurt Francis if I didn’t tell him now.  We promised to be open and honest, so I took a deep breath and I looked at him.

“I’m not sure, Francis, if this is the right time.  But maybe there is no ‘right time’ at all for this.  You know I promised to tell you about what happened two weeks ago?”

“Yes, I know, but I also said that you should take your time and tell me when you were ready.”

“Well, I tried today to bring up the subject somehow and I think that is what has been bothering me all day.  Furthermore, Alexei told me that I needed to tell you because you were worried about it and I would feel better if I told someone.”

“Only when you are ready, Nick and not before.  I don’t want you to feel pressured by me.  I know you’re not lying to me, simply having trouble telling me at the moment.”

“I feel no pressure to tell you, Francis.  I’m just not sure where to start and I must say I’m a little nervous about how you might respond to the situation.”

“Well, don’t be afraid.  I would never hold anything against you.  I just love you too much for that.”

“I know, Francis.  But I need you to promise me something.”

“Whatever you want, Nick, I know I can trust you.”

“Well, this is not about trust, Francis.  I want you to promise that you won’t do anything impulsive and that you won’t get mad at anyone involved in what I am going to tell you.”

“I’m not sure if I can promise that, Nick.  I know you were hurt and that only makes me angry.”

“I know, Francis, but still, you have to promise me you’ll control yourself.  Otherwise, I’m not sure I can tell you this.  I’ll also need your help afterwards, so I expect you to respect my point of view and to allow me to handle this my own way.”

“OK, Nick.  If that is what you want, then I’ll do that and see where this is going to lead.  But if I think it is necessary to tell David, for example, you must agree to it.”

“OK, it’s a deal, Francis.”

“You remember the visit from the doctor and the evening afterwards?”

 “Yes I can remember.  I think that was the first time I noticed you.”

 “Well that was the evening it all started.”  “That long ago?”

 “Yes Francis.  We had some kind of test that evening about our sexuality and our fantasies. They said it was for some official research they where doing.  But it turned somewhat different.”

 “How is that Nick? What did they do?”

 “Please Francis, just let me tell it, without interrupting, otherwise I’m not sure if I will be able to tell you all of it.”

 ”Ok”, he said.  But from the look on his face I could see that he was not really agreeable.

I started to tell him what happened at the doctors place and when I told him that I had submissive feelings, his face didn’t show that much of a smile any more and I started to become afraid to continue.  I slowly told him of the pairing up with Mike and what happened then during our first few sessions: the outdoor task, in the shop, and how I felt so humiliated.

 “Oh no, I had no idea”, he responded.  He had been there and he could remember what happened.

“Oh I am so sorry you had to go through all of that Nick.”   He didn’t keep his promise and he had started to cry a little. So far I had been able to tell this story without feeling too much emotion because I knew that was the only way I could tell him what happenes.  But when I saw his first tears start, my reserve broke also and I felt the pain I had in the past.  Pain I didn’t know existed because I had pleasure also when I was humiliated; but the pain became more and more obvious now.

“Please, Francis.  Let me continue, otherwise I’m not sure if I can do this.”

Despite the fear and the tears on Francis’s face, I continued haltingly until I came what happened on Sunday afternoon.  I just sat there and tears starting to flow down my cheeks.

I’m not sure what happened next.  I felt Francis holding me and I got cold and started to shake.

From Francis’s point of view:

Oh, shit, I though, what was happening with Nick?  It was difficult to listen to him.  I had questions, a lot of them, but I held back just as he wanted.  At some point, I couldn’t control myself any more and I started to cry.  This seemed to push Nick over the edge because, until then, he had been telling me what had happened almost without any emotion in his voice or on his face, as if it had been something that had happened to someone else instead of to him.  But now he totally collapsed.  I think he was about to tell me why he was so troubled when I found him.  He was shaking and crying like a baby.  I couldn’t do anything but hold him and, when I touched him, he put his arms around me and he held me very tightly.

After ten minutes, nothing had changed.  I knew we couldn’t stay like this any longer, so I slowly tried to extricate myself from Nick’s grasp.  I laid him down on the couch and, instead of holding me, he grabbed ahold of the couch cushions.

I let him go and walked quickly to the guest room.  I stopped for a second at David’s door, but I knew I would have to tell him too much.  It was better to try and see if Alexei was awake.  He knew some of this story already and he was older, so maybe he could help.

I knocked softly on his door and, when there was no answer, I slowly opened the door to see him sitting on his bed with his headphones on.  He smiled when he saw me and took his headphones off and said, “What do I owe the honour of your visit, Francis?  Are you not in the wrong room?” he said with a little smile.

“I need your help, Alexei.  Nick is downstairs and he just collapsed.  He is crying and shaking all over.”

He stood up of the bed and said, “What happened?  What did you do to him, Francis?”

“Nothing, Alexei.  You must believe me.  He was just telling me why he collapsed two weeks ago.”

“Oh, no.  I didn’t expect him to tell you so soon.  Well, let’s go down and see how he is.”

When we came downstairs, Nick was still lying on the couch crying and shaking. Alexei took him in his arms and started softly to talk to him.  It seemed to help somehow because slowly Nick started to return to normal and began to look a little bit better.

Alexei looked at me and nodded at me to come towards them.  I did as he wanted and he let go of Nick.  I took him back into his arms.  He had stopped crying now and stopped shaking but he looked like he could start both of those things at any moment.

We stayed like that for almost ten minutes.  Alexei had gone to the kitchen and made us a cup of tea.  I brought the cup to his lips and slowly got some tea into Nick.  His breathing started to calm down more and more, definitely a good sign.

“Are you feeling better, Nick?” Alexei asked.

“Yes, I guess,” Nick answered.

“Do you think you can stand telling us what happened on Sunday without getting upset again?”

“I’m not sure, Alexei.”

“To be honest, Nick, I think it might be better to tell us, because otherwise you might never get this far again.”

From Nick’s view:

They wanted me to continue.  Could I do that?  Could I really tell what happened that Sunday afternoon without breaking apart again?  I looked at Alexei and saw worry and concern on his face.  I hardly dared look at Francis.  I was too afraid of what I would see there:  rejection, hate for what I had done.  I was just not sure so I didn’t look at him as I started to think of where I would continue. I haltingly started to tell them that Mike had bound me on his bed and that he left.  The next few minutes I just told them what had happened without looking at either of them.  Not knowing how they where going to react.  When I finished I just sat there waiting for them to do or say something.

Nothing happened, no sounds, and I started to become afraid again. But because nothing was said I knew I had to get my head up and see what they where doing. I looked up first in the direction where Alexei was sitting  I knew I was still afraid of what Francis would say or do. When I opened my eyes I saw that Alexei was not where he had been sitting before I started the second part.  I turned my head around to see where he was.  He was seated near Francis.  He was holding him and Francis was lying with his head on Alexei’s chest.  Why was he doing that?  Then suddenly I started to become aware of the fact that some one was crying quite loud and then suddenly I realized it was Francis.  Why was he crying?  I was the one who was hurting.  Was he mad at me?  Disappointed?  Was that the reason he was crying?  Had I lost him with this?  I looked at Alexei again and he gave me a little smile.  He just wanted to reassure me I think, but that wasn’t working. I had disappointed Francis and he didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.  Why wouldn’t look to me to comfort him?  I stood up slowly and began to walk away from them back to the safety of my room.  I knew I had made a big mistake. I should never have told him.  I knew there was a chance that I wouled lose him, and now I did.  I just wanted to get out of there.

I walked upstairs to my room quickly and just lay down on my bed.  I was just in too much pain to cry.  I just laid there and stared at the ceiling.

From Francis’ view:

Oh no. He couldn’t have gone through all of this. There was no way someone could survive such a thing.  No wonder he had tried to commit suicide.  Nick just seemed to be telling his story without any emotions at all, but I couldn’t hold back.  I wanted to comfort him but I just couldn’t.  I felt Alexei at my side and he hugged me.  I quickly grabbed him and started to cry uncontrollably.

I calmed down after a few minutes and then I looked up to find Nick, but where was he?

 I turned quicklyand looked at Alexei.

 “He just went upstairs. I am not sure but I think he was hurt because you didn’t look at him or talk to him.”

 “Oh no I never intended that.  I was just to shaken up from it all to say anything.  I felt so sorry, so ashamed of myself not seeing what was happening with Nick until it was too late. I have been such a lousy friend.”

  “No Francis, stop with that right now.  You know you did everything possible when you found him about to kill himself, so no worry about that. You have been a great friend ever since, so don’t worry about it”

 “Well I am not sure if I can act normal toward him without thinking about Mike.  Mike.  Oh I could kill him for what he let happen!   No, not kill him, but make him feel what he did to Nick, for sure.”

“I think you have to be careful with that Francis.  There is more than only a slave/master relationship between Mike and Nick.  There is something like love also.  I am not saying that it is the same kind of love that there is between you and Nick, but there is something there, otherwise Nick would never done what he did. You must understand that part of him; probably hating doing what he did and part of him wanted it, maybe needed it to feel wanted.”

 “I don’t know Alexei. I can’t believe you could love some one who did that to you, that is just not there for me.”

“You must pull yourself together and try not to judge Nick for what happened.  He really needs you now because I believe he thought he lost you a moment ago when he was telling you about it.”

“I know, but I have still so many questions. Why did he go along with it? Why didn’t he stop it somewhere along the way?”

 “To be honest with you, Francis, I think you will have to leave those questions for the future. You better try to focus on Nick and what he needs at the moment and on yourself.  If your relationship is going further there will be time enough to learn about the reasons why.”

“I think you are right about that. I was just being selfish.  I might do well to go upstairs and try to find out how he is doing.”

 “Comfort him, Francis, and don’t ask questions you will know when he is ready for those.” 

“Thanks Alexei, I’m not sure what we would have done lately if you had not been here.”

 “I’m just trying to be a friend to both of you and you are having quite a rough time at the moment.”

I knew I better go upstairs now.  Knowing Nick just a little bit, he would be devastated by this time because I didn’t come after him. But I just didn’t hear him leave, otherwise I would probably have gone after him right away.  Just imagining what he went through broke my heart and there was no way that I would let him go away.  I wanted him; I wanted to be there for him just like he had been for me lately.

From Nick’s point of view:

I just lay on my bed, doing nothing, feeling nothing.  I had lost my boyfriend tonight.  That was what he had been.  Francis had been my boyfriend.  But after what I told him and his reaction, I was sure I’d lost him.  He would never be able to love me any more after what I told him.  He would never understand the feelings I’d had which had made me do these things.

Then suddenly I felt something touching my arm and I looked up.

I wanted to turn away but I couldn’t.  Next thing I realised was that I was in Francis’s arms.  We were both crying, not bitterly but softly.

“I’m so sorry, Nick, that this all happened to you and I’m more sorry I didn’t respond better downstairs.  I love you, Nick, whatever happened.  You must never forget that I love you.”

While we were crying, he kept repeating those last three words softly into my ear.  Somehow I became aware of them and I started to cry a little less and, in between deep gasps, I managed to say,  “Do you really mean that, Francis, even after I told you what happened?”

“Yes, Nick.  I will always love you.”  And to make sure I believed him, his lips found their way to mine and we started to kiss again.  It was not a passionate kiss but more a reassuring one and I felt all the love Francis had for me was put in it.

“I love you too, Francis,” I said when he let go.

I wasn’t sure what to do now.  I knew that Francis must have tons of questions and I was afraid he was going to ask them.  I wasn’t sure if I could answer him right now.

“We’d better try to sleep a little bit, Nick.  Sleep without worrying for one night.  I love you and I know we can get through this together.  I’m here for you and I will help you to let this go.”

“Thanks, Francis,” was all I could say to him.

“Don’t worry, I just want to be here for you just as you’ve been here for me the last two days.”

We started to kiss again and, for the second night in a row, we fell asleep dressed on my bed.

I woke up feeling I was lying on something warm, which slowly moved a little bit.  I opened my eyes and saw that it was still dark outside.  It must have been quite early on Sunday morning.  I though a little bit about what took place last night and looked down to see the strong abs of Francis.  He was still asleep but I just couldn’t let it go. Me being on his chest made his t-shirt ride up a little and I saw some skin of his stomach teasingly showing.

I put my hand on his bare skin and slowly pushed his t-shirt further up.  His soft warm skin felt so lovely to my hands.  Just lying there made me realize again how much I loved him.  I slowly raised my head and started to push the t-shirt a little higher until I could reach his nipples.  I started slowly to rub them.  They became a little bit harder while I was doing that.  I pushed the t-shirt a little further so I could touch his nipples with my lips.  I started to suck on the right one first.  I heard Francis moan a little and I stopped but he must have been awake at that moment because he said softly, “No, Nick, please continue.”

I went back to his nipple, softly teasing it with my tongue and then again putting my lips around each one in turn and sucking on them.  I continued to do that for almost five minutes, I think, and from the sounds Francis was making, I knew I was giving him a lot of pleasure.  In the meantime, his hands went down over my back and slowly moved towards my buttocks.  I felt him grab them and slowly started to really feel them up.

I pushed the t-shirt a little bit further and decided it was time to give Francis a wake- up kiss.  As I pushed the t-shirt over his head, I suddenly kissed him on his lips before he realized what I was doing.  He hadn’t seen that one coming, and I was in complete control of the kiss.  I sucked his lips first and then I went into his mouth and started to touch his tongue with mine.

He let me take the lead and, when I stopped kissing, I went back to his nipples.  I knew I wanted more this time, so I slowly made a trail kissing and licking from his nipples to his belly.  With my hand I started to unzip his pants and he was more than willing, lifting his ass to help me to lower them.

There he was in that beautiful white underwear.  His cock was already hard and I knew what I wanted, but I also wanted to tease him a little, so I slowly backed off a little and with one hand I began to touch is cock.  Not wild but just touching it and then back off. Just giving him the idea he wanted more, and each time I backed off it seemed he thrust his hips forward to try to keep the contact with my hand.  I just softly went over the head of his cock, which was clearly outlined in his underwear.  Then I went downwards to his balls, which I took in my hands and softly handled them a little.  He let out a loud moan this time and I knew he was really enjoying this.

In the meantime he was still feeling up my bottom.  He went into my trousers with one hand, just my underwear between his hand and my flesh now.

I continued to straddle his cock and after a while I brought my face a little closer and started to blow some air over the top of his dick.  I felt how he shivered a little bit when I did that.  His underwear was now wet with pre-cum so the air would have felt a little bit cold.  I repeated this a few times more.

  “Oh god!  Keep doing that Nick and I will come without touching myself at all.” 

This was a sign for me to slow up teasing him a little bit.  So I stopped blowing.  I just looked down at it for a moment. In the meantime Francis got himself back together and started to get my jeans lower so he could get a better grip on my bottom.  I helped him by loosening up my pants and slowly we pushed them down.  He continued to touch my bottom with one hand, but the other made its way to my crotch.  I knew I’d better focus back on his package otherwise I would not get there anymore.

I brought my mouth towards his cock and I slowly started to lick it through his underwear.  When I reached the top of his dick I felt the taste of his pre-cum and that was just so wonderful!  I sucked it out of his underwear and at the same time must have put some sucking motion on the top of his dick also, because he started to moan louder.  I went back toward his balls and tried to get one in my mouth, just playing with it, sucking a little bit.  I knew I could not go on with this much longer, so I went back to the head of his cock, what I really wanted a taste of.  I got his underwear between my teeth and slowly pulled it down so the top of his cock came free.  The sight and the smell of it made me feel so wonderful, so full of love for him, that my dick became even harder then it already felt.

  I believe that Francis noticed it too because between heavy breaths he said: “Oh you are really enjoying this, aren’t you Nick?”

I didn’t answer him but just brought my mouth closer to his cock.  I licked the top of it slowly, getting some precum in my mouth.  Oh my god how I had been longing for this!  I felt Francis start to get ready to shoot.  His body tensed below me and I knew I myself was not far from shooting. Then when I was back with my tongue at his cock again I felt how it started to contract and I backed off a little.  Then suddenly he moaned really loud and his first spurts of cum out of his cock landed on my face, in my hair.  I had closed my mouth as I didn’t know if I wanted that already but the smell of his cum, seeing his dick cumming like that brought me to the edge myself.  I started to hump Francis’ fist a little more then started to unload myself covering his hand with my own cum.

Our dicks came to rest again and I felt that both our breathing came back to normal again also.  I turned around to look at Francis.  He suddenly came towards my face and I prepared to receive a kiss, but instead he started to lick my face where his cum was splashed. 

 “I better clean you up, a little bit”, he said.  It felt great to have his tongue going over my face.  Then he stopped and looked at me with a smile that was telling me that he was up to something.  He suddenly brought his hand towards my face and I saw it was the hand my cum was on.  I looked at him and his expression seemed to say for me to go ahead and lick some.  I brought my tongue towards his hand and softly lapped up a few drops of my cum.  Then getting really into it I took some more.  I looked over his hand towards his face and he had a great smile on his face.  I knew I had to do something to get him back so instead of licking again I surprised him by kissing him on the lips.  I felt the taste of his cum as he tasted my cum on my lips.  We backed off and laughed a little bit.

‘Thanks Nick, that was great.  I never thought that it would feel like that.” 

“Well I enjoyed it too.  I just wanted it so much when I woke up, I couldn’t control it.”

We just lay down beside each other sometimes kissing sometimes just looking into each other’s face, slowly drifting again into sleep.

“Hey, you guys, wake up.”

“Oh, no!” I thought.  David entered the room this time, and I realized I was not dressed and we were just lying on the covers.

“Oh, god.  Can’t you guys make sure to get undressed before falling asleep?”  He had turned his head away but kept laughing.

“Shhhh,” I said.  “Be quiet, David.  I don’t want dad to find out Francis slept over here again.”

“He’s still in his room, so I think he might still  be asleep.  I only came to see if you would join me in making a farewell breakfast for Alexei.”

“Hmmm, I like that idea, David.  We’ll join you soon just let us get cleaned up and dressed.”

“OK, as long as you know I’ll come back if you’re not down in about ten minutes, so don’t get distracted.”

“Get out of here, David.  We’ll resist temptation and be down in ten minutes at the most.”

“”Oh, it can talk as well as being the sleepy beauty!”

“David!” Francis said in exasperation and he looked around to see if he could find something to throw.

David left quickly, knowing he couldn’t deal with the both of us.

I looked at Francis and said, “Thank you, that was just what I needed this morning.”

“You’re welcome, Nick.  I love you, don’t ever forget that.”

He started to kiss me but I backed off a little.  “We’d better not start this now or we’ll never get down to the kitchen.”

“OK, that’s fair enough, we’d better get dressed.”

We did as he said and went downstairs to prepare a farewell breakfast for Alexei.

“So, how did you two end up in your bedroom, Nick.  I believe you were on the couch downstairs when I left.”

Neither of us answered that question directly and I saw David begin to look strangely at us.  I felt tears well up in my eyes and I only hoped that David would drop the subject and talk about something else.

“We might tell you that in the future … just say that we needed each other a lot last night.  And if it’s anything to you, we didn’t do anything so don’t worry about it,” Francis answered for me.

“I was just wondering.  I don’t want to horn in on your relationship, Nick,” he answered me instead of talking to Francis.

He probably had seen my face getting very pale.

“I’m going to see if Alexei is awake, so you two can finish up breakfast.”

I walked towards the door and saw David looking at Francis with a question mark on his face.

I walked upstairs towards the quest room.  I slowly opened it and saw that Alexei was standing there all dressed, putting his other clothes into his bag.

“I see you’re already awake, Alexei.”

“Yea, I needed to pack my stuff.”

“Well, breakfast should be ready in about ten minutes or so.”

“OK, thanks.  Did you just get out of bed to have breakfast with me?”

“Yes, we wanted to give you a good farewell breakfast, especially after last evening.”

Alexei looked concerned at me and said, “You’re OK with it for now, Nick?”

I hesitated answering him and he must have seen that.  “I’m glad I told Francis, Alexei, but I’m not sure if I could do such a thing again.”

“Well, just remember, whenever you want to talk about it, you just let me know.”

“Thanks, Alexei.  I appreciate that a lot.  I’ll make sure to write you an e-mail from time to time to inform you of my progress in my gymnastics.  I’ll make sure to add some personal information if need be.”

“I know you will and I’m looking forward to reading them.  I don’t think I’ll be able to join you at the city championships, but I’ll be back after those for another week of training.”

“I’m looking forward to that, Alexei.  I didn’t know I was so good at it.”

“Talent does always just appear; sometimes it needs a little bit of pushing.”

“I’ll let you finish up and see you downstairs in a moment.”

In the meantime, downstairs in the kitchen:

“Are you ok, Francis?

 I’m not sure, but I believe I asked the wrong question a moment ago.”

 “I think you just might have, David.  I’m not sure if I should tell you this, but I promised you some time ago that I would tell you if I found something out about what happened to Nick two weeks ago.”

 “Ah!  So he told you?”

 “Yeah, he did, but it was not nice David, and I thought I might have to bring him to hospital.   He was half way in shock and I got Alexei to help me with him.”

  “Why didn’t you get me?  You know I wouldn’t do anything to hurt my brother.”

 “I know David, but I knew that Alexei already knew something and that Nick probably would open up more to him than if you were there.”

 “Oh.”

 “Don’t do like that David, I’m glad I did it that way, because I am not sure that you could have helped with it all yesterday.”

“So what happened to him?” 

“Oh no!  I said I would tell you when I knew something, but I’m not the one to tell you what it is.  I have to leave that to Nick or at least have his permission to tell you.”

“But do you two need help with it or not?” he said a little bit impatiently.

 “Not for the moment David, although it was something I never expected.  I am still trying to cope with it.”

  “Was it that horrible?”

 “You have no idea David.  I still have so many questions, but I can’t ask them right now.  I have to be there to support him, not to attack him on why it all happened, or even let him see that I have troubles with it.”

 “Well if you want to talk about it let me know.  I know I can help you with it.”

 “I’m not sure you can in this case David.  I am feeling so sorry for what happened, but I can’t do anything for him at the moment.”

  “Just being there for him is enough Francis, and of course your love means a lot to him.”

“I know.  Well we better get the breakfast ready before they come down.”

I came back into the kitchen and I saw both David and Francis looking at me with concern.   I knew then that Francis must have told David something.  Francis walked towards me and kissed me on the lips.  We sat down at the table and enjoyed a lovely breakfast together with Alexei.  He gave us the training schedule he wanted us to follow, and some oral instructions.  He said he predicted the end score for each of us at the city championships and he put them in an e-mail to be delivered while we where practising.  He expected us to do at least better then that.  Otherwise he would be disappointed.  We thanked him for his work so far and we told him we were looking forward to his next week of training.  By that time Dad had come down and he took Alexei to the airport.  I was sorry to see him go, not only because of his good looks or his ability to train, but also for not being able to speak with him so easily anymore.  He turned out to be a pretty good friend during this last week.

“So now we better clean up the livingroom and the kitchen.  I don’t want to have my girlfriend think I live with pigs”, David said after Dad left.

  I had forgotten about the dinner that evening and I gave David and Francis worried look.

 “Don’t worry Nick, Kathy will be very positive about you two being gay.”

 “You didn’t tell her yet then?” 

“No I didn’t Nick, I just wanted to keep it as a surprise for her tonight.”

To be continued...

Posted: 10/23/15