The night sky; sultry atmosphere of black silk, city lights bouncing off its shimmering canopy, engendering a reflective, dark grey crown, which hovered above the city centre. There were stars but the savvy of technology dulled the terrestrial illuminations, killing them softly in response. An average moon, a waning, quarter moon, it was a white stain or spectacular brooch at the edge of a black veil.

 

The harbour; glistening jewel of the city and a glimmering, blue-green sanctuary, at night its waters were another shade of black. Its size enormous and its depth of the deepest, as it’s gentle, liquid fingers curled and thrashed on walls of ancient sandstone. Vessels floated silently and inconspicuously, their lights mere specks in the dark.

 

The public gardens; silhouetted botanical refuge before the monolithic concrete giants, the gates closed since daylights demise, now a respite for the flora in the peaceful solitude of darkness. Still they spoke and moved, the rustle of leaves and the creak of branches, when the breeze saw fit to bestow its warm presence. It was summer and from evening through night the warmth was a comforting shawl.

 

Though the gates were closed and locked, for those with prohibited desire, entry was available with little effort. For him, the sad man, his entry held no malcontent but was instead overladen with discontent.

 

He wept from eyes consumed by pain. Not hard enough to wail but from deep enough to heave his chest and wet enough to blur his vision. Besieged by thoughts of eternal sleep, when the ache became intolerable, he would stagger.

 

From the curving path that snaked within the tunnel of trees and between the beds of flowers, he stepped out into the open, a seeming choice of left or right, as another path crossed his current path’s conclusion. Always another alternative, it would come moments later, when he realised the new path ran in partnership with the wall, which bordered the harbour’s boundary.

 

When the third option occurred the alternatives vanished, his sight like a horse wearing blinkers, staring straight ahead. The man came to a stop, his hips coming to rest against the sandstone and his arms sliding onto the walls crest. He looked out over the harbour but though it was beautiful, for the moment its magic was empty and his gaze dropped to the salty surface, lapping perhaps three metres below his hands.

 

His contemplation was like a fog falling over everything, his surrounds a void to his sight. His eyes released two rivers of tears while his loneliness seemed like a black hole drawing him deeper into his abyss.

 

“There has been no event. Nothing other than need has brought me to this state of my soul. There has been no lost love, I am not destitute and no special someone has died. There lies the point. Nothing and no one,” he justified his endgame thoughtfully.

 

Following on a moment later, the man questioned silently, “All I want is one man and love. Is that asking too much? I would give up everything for that. I watch as others receive my dream and yet I am denied. Why?”

 

He heard the irritating response in his mind, the one that questioned if his thoughts and feelings and also his choices and actions, had all been wrong. He wondered if his dream had been a noose he placed around his own neck. Of course there was the nagging, easy option, the one suggesting he join the herd but from his experience, it meant accepting a way of life he perceived as settling for less.

 

In his sadness, he frowned before he transformed his following thoughts to words. They were thoughts he had come to believe, despite the damnable whisper of self-doubt. The thoughts he spoke were meant for no ones ears. They were simply justification of his choice; a choice he believed would maintain his integrity.

 

“No death other than mine. I’m already a corpse, a walking façade amidst life. It’s what happens when purpose evades and when finally acceptance is sovereign in knowing your existence is pointless. Why not turn thought into reality, false death into true death,” he whispered his choice to the night.

 

He was a good man, a decent and honest man. His brandy eyes in combination with his soft brown hair, made his handsome face even more attractive. In general his life was acceptable, however, when it came to love he was a lost soul.

 

He knew he was attracted to males before he knew himself. By the time he reached the end of his adolescence, his looks presented cuisine and his youth had been tasted by many an adult man. His heart was his defining nature and so his looks interfered with what he yearned for. In his immaturity he offered sex to men in the hope of finding love. He opened his heart to every man but the men he met wanted sex, not love.

 

Before he had even come of age, his desperate requirement for love lay in a dark shadow of sex. Perhaps it was misfortune or maybe even fate but not once did his path cross with a man that was looking for love. As the years went by his perception of gay life began to change. He felt like a steak on a barbecue, waiting to be dragged onto a random plate and devoured.

 

In his latter teenage years, from general life to bars and parties, he could find no men of emotional substance, men who wanted long-term. He loved sex but from his perspective, it seemed it was always all about sex and nothing more. He wanted so much more.

 

For this man it was about really being seen and really being heard. He did not seek fame or fortune, about those things he could not have cared less. He just wanted to love and be loved. He wanted desperately to be held by someone special and he wanted a man he could really talk to.

 

It seemed reasonable to want a man to share his life but he began to think he had become one more meal on an enormous menu. Even his closest male friends wanted to bed him. He saw no opportunity for a deeper connection and he wondered if he was to blame. He questioned if he was normal and wondered if he was the only gay man of his kind.

 

Eventually so dissatisfied, he turned his back on the hunger games, determined to only have sex with the man he would someday meet and love. He looked for love, declined offers of sex and decades rolled by in denial. Before he knew what had happened, his abyss had become a miserable, emotional solitude, he was lonely, still single and forty.

 

As of this night he wanted no part of the existence he had come to know. He could feel nothing other than the ache of loneliness. He did not want to settle, he did not want to give in and he definitely did not want to contaminate his idea of love, even if it was idealistic.

 

He inhaled deeply, his lungs filling with the aroma of salt and their volume of oxygen. From his vantage point, as he leaned forward and looked straight down, the wall shadowing and therefore blocking dancing lights on water, the surface looked like dark glass without colour. He knew it was deep but he could see nothing beyond its blackness.

 

“The colour of my heart,” he said.

 

“The colour of thought and emotion does not convey the colour of one’s heart!”

 

It was a voice and words that seemed to float down from the dark sky above. It was curious because the quiet had remained unbroken. He believed he had heard it, he was sure he had heard it but it made no sense. There was no sound to the voice and so it was more like a thought in his head but it was a response to his words and he knew it was not his thought.

 

“It seemed real, surely it was real but how could it be real if it didn’t happen? It had to be real but then again, the only sound in this silence is the ripples of water against the wall,” he thought but then it happened again.

 

“The colour is sadness and I will swallow it away!”

 

Again there was silence except for the water. It could not be real but again he believed he had heard a voice. He glanced around swiftly but there was no one to be seen. He stared at the water, an unsettled expression on his face and he wondered if to add insult to injury, if he was going crazy as well.

 

The voice he doubted had been deep and liquid. It was honeyed and carried such warmth it felt like a blanket over his shoulders in an icy cold. It was soothing and yet impossible and so, though he wanted to hear the voice again, it filled him with gripping fear. His fear made time slow to unworldly.

 

Suddenly the sense grew, a crawling sensation on his skin, telling him he was not alone. In less than a millisecond an onslaught of thought and reaction coursed through his entire being. He turned his head to the right but by choice, very, very slowly.

 

A stranger, a man, somehow was right beside him and leaning against the wall, taking on a replica stance, their shoulders mere centimetres from touching.

 

The breath the man sucked between his lips was long and deep yet silent. The terror of his shock was beyond recognition and the weakness of his body felt like he had been unplugged from an imperative power source. He tried to move, believing he needed to run from the stranger but all substance of anatomical knowledge was lost, vanished due to his fright as well as his comprehension of how someone, anyone, could be there beside him at all.

 

Then it registered. Those words, the words the stranger must have spoken, even though he was sure they had not been spoken. The words he had heard, even though he could not exactly remember hearing them, he remembered what they had said. Before he had the chance to consider them, he allowed his eyes to focus on the opposing eyes, face and body.

 

“Those eyes, damn, those eyes,” the man thought, as the eyes shone like igniting phosphorus in the night “and that face, so divine.”

 

The man’s eyes dropped and devoured the huge frame of a body beneath a silver-grey, tailored suit. It made him imagine a material mirror, shining yet not reflective. The body shaped the suit and so he was certain a powerful physique was hidden beneath the form-fitting garb. He looked up again.

 

“Damn, those scintillating eyes,” he elaborated but this time, though unrealised, he said it out loud.

 

In his life the stranger had approached many a man from around the world. From cerebral to emotional and from Herculean to epicene, he had seen them all and tasted of their wares. However, he had never approached a man in such an enigmatic manner. As he looked at this man, though, despite his impressively handsome allure, again the stranger felt a curious sense. It had been that sense in combination with the words he had replied to, which had drawn him to such heartache in the first place. It was a sense of similarity, a resemblance to his soul.

 

“I’m honoured my eyes please you,” the stranger said.

 

Finally the man’s gasp was audible and his legs worked as he took a step backwards and to his side, turning to face the stranger directly. Still his legs felt like jelly, barely solid, perhaps suddenly boneless, as they quivered in unison with his body.

 

“I didn’t mean to scare you; don’t be afraid, it’s not my intent to hurt or hinder in the way you imagine,” the stranger said, turning to face the man as well.

 

Unable to bring his completed question through his fright and into his mouth, the man asked, “How?”

 

“I came to your side, what else needs to be explained? Perhaps I should have spoken to pre-empt your unnerved reaction but my intrigue was paramount,” the stranger said.

 

Still incapable of speaking a full sentence, the man said, “But?”

 

“Fleet of foot, my friend,” the stranger replied as if the question had been asked.

 

The man said, “I didn’t…”

 

“Perhaps you didn’t hear because your mind was distracted,” the stranger responded correctly again.

 

“It doesn’t…”

 

“No, Tory, it doesn’t make sense, at least not in your mind. For the moment, let’s agree my appearance is inexplicable. Simply put for now, I heard what you thought, I came to your side and now I desire a dialogue, at least to begin,” the stranger said.

 

Tory was certain the stranger had just misspoken. Something he had said did not seem right but the curiosity seemed less important than the glaring fact that had stunned him to his core.

 

Astonished, Tory said, “My name? How? I didn’t…”

 

“You did, Tory, just not in the way you’re used to or more specifically, in a way you understand,” the stranger said and then took a step, somehow unseen.

 

Tory was about to question the statement but then he almost yelped and stepped back, as the stranger seemed to vanish and reappear beside him instantly. He thought he must have blinked but before he knew what had happened, the handsome stranger with stunning eyes was beside him, the sides of their bodies touching and his arm curled strongly but warmly around Tory’s shoulders.

 

“My god,” Tory rasped.

 

“Not even close but I’m complimented,” the stranger joked and then laughed softly and airily.

 

Tory said amidst a gasp, still incapable of completing a question, “Who?”

 

“Please, Tory, I’m sure you can be quite eloquent when you want to be. If you continue to speak in this manner, we will never reach our destination. My name is Uluru,” the stranger said.

 

Tory’s gaze froze momentarily, as his mind processed quickly and then recalled. He had heard the name of course but with certainty, he knew he had never heard it as the name of a person. It could be, may have been a person’s name but the only association he was aware of was with the great rock at the centre of Australia.

 

The moment he brought his body into contact with Tory’s body, Uluru felt a sensation not unlike static electricity. It crackled as it coursed beneath his skin, a sound and feeling only Uluru could sense. He thought it was exciting to feel something unexpected and different.

 

Following an inconceivable lifetime of searching for someone he believed with certainty would change everything; to suddenly feel a sensation so different it was almost exquisite, it made the beat of Uluru’s heart increase. It became another reason his intrigue with this man deepened.

 

Tory was stunned in so many ways. He knew he had never seen such an impossibly handsome man. He had never seen such unnerving yet comforting eyes. He had never known someone who knew what he was going to say and answered his questions before he asked them. He also knew he had never felt such need or attraction for a man. He felt drawn to him, not only physically but emotionally as well. Silently he thought, “This is impossible. Who is this man?”

 

Uluru slid his arm from Tory’s shoulders and turned to him directly. He looked at Tory knowingly with a small smile and said, “Questions and answers need not be the only source of knowledge and understanding. In the midst of this night we could learn of each other in alternate ways, perhaps conversation.”

 

The stranger’s voice was a variation of any male voice, standard in its difference and yet the deep tone was mellifluous, resonating with the pulse of Tory’s body and the beat of his heart. It seemed to move through him like warm blood.

 

The more the stranger spoke, the more Tory’s body settled. His fright and fear were draining away, his uncertainty replaced with trust and in a way he did not understand, Tory felt need. It was a need to be with the stranger, to remain in Uluru’s presence. He thought he was losing his mind. He took a single step backwards.

 

“What do you want? Leave me be and let me go,” Tory said with the last residue of his fright and uncertainty, while struggling with the impossible attraction.

 

“I have not restrained you, Tory. If you wish to leave my company then walk away.”

 

Uluru almost withheld the offer. There was something about this sad man that set him apart from all the others. Above all who had come before, he did not want this one to leave, not that anyone ever left at the start but still it bothered him that as a consequence, Tory might turn away and disappear into the night.

 

Uluru thought it was mystifying that any one man should affect him so innately and with such swiftness, however, in a way he simply was not used to, he felt uncertainty where Tory was concerned. Uluru’s resoluteness was being challenged and compromised by the crushing emotion of a deep, innate hope.

 

An aberrant notion that this could be it, the moment Uluru had waited for, became a true distraction. He knew from the crux of his being that after so long alone and so many soul-destroying disappointments, this hope, his hope, was giving life to doubt. However, Uluru’s unyielding endurance to always strive forward and continue, remained steadfast, as he wondered if his relentless journey in search of the one, a man who could bring peace to his unending solitude, lay in the choice he would offer and that Tory was yet to make.

 

Tory knew despite himself he did not want to leave but it was infuriating. He thought he should be afraid but he no longer was. He thought he should turn and run but an irrational argument battled inside his head and he was stopping himself. He heard his mother’s voice from when he was a child, telling him strangers were dangerous and not to be trusted. Still, some part of him told him to submit to the stranger.

 

Tory wondered if superficial motives were in effect. This dark-skinned, breathtaking stranger, a man so handsome it was beyond comprehension, had a face that was divine and yet rugged, smooth and yet weathered and the eyes and lips seemed to call to him in some hypnotic manner. In addition, something about this man caused him to feel like he was spinning and if soon he would lose his balance.

 

Feelings of random attraction and desire were influences he had long ago taught himself to enjoy but control. After all these years alone, Tory thought he should be able to turn away with ease but there was something more innate and dynamic happening and he was unable to let go of his need.

 

Tory ordered his legs to move but he felt like an invisible cord was tied around both of their waists, keeping them in close proximity. It was eerie and inexplicable but though he did not believe in the occult or the supernatural, still the incongruity of his questions followed.

 

Tory asked, “What have you done to me? Are you a warlock? Have you cast a spell over me?”

 

Uluru looked at Tory and though he maintained an impassive expression, he was taken aback. He knew his approach required limited answers and the withholding of certain facts. The essence of who he was could not be revealed immediately. A cautious approach of ambiguity and redirection was needed and he hoped, temporary. What surprised him was that he was not manipulating Tory at all. Even so, Tory was suggesting he was. He wondered why but whatever Tory’s reason, Uluru could not sense it. Believing it a temporary distraction, he dismissed the thought so they could continue.

 

Spuriously he said, “What is magic, Tory? What could I do or what do you think I could do to you that you wouldn’t allow me to do?”

 

“Your answers, Uluru, they say nothing. You answer questions with questions, not answering anything at all. Again I’ll ask you, who are you and what do you want?”

 

“I am someone with a solution and someone who wants to help you,” Uluru said.

 

Tory queried, “A solution?”

 

“A solution that is an alternative,” Uluru replied.

 

Tory asked, “An alternative to what?”

 

“To your solution, of course,” Uluru answered.

 

“I don’t understand,” Tory said.

 

Uluru smiled and replied, “I think you do. What is your destination for this night?”

 

Tory asked disbelievingly, “What?”

 

Tory’s stunned reaction was based on the thought that it was simply impossible that anyone could know of the course he had chosen only an hour beforehand.

 

“Perhaps,” Uluru said, “we could sideline the question of what and instead consider the question of why? I find it curious you would choose such a path and also, I wonder what could be so soul destroying that you feel there is no other path to choose. What is it that has left you so empty?”

 

Tory could not believe the man could know and he also did not want the man or anyone else to know. The look of total shock on his face was enhanced when his mouth fell open and he shook his head no, in complete disbelief.

 

Realising his knowledge was an obstruction between them, Uluru changed course swiftly. He turned away from Tory and moved back to the wall. Leaning against it, he gazed over the harbour and then with a quiet and gentle voice he said, “This is the most beautiful harbour in the world.”

 

Tory stared at the back of the man’s head. His shock turned to a stupefied curiosity. He felt this was truly the moment to retreat but instead he stepped forward until he was back where he had been minutes before. He looked at the harbour also but now that his focus had shifted, he again saw its magic.

 

“It is beautiful but I can’t say it’s the most beautiful because I’ve not travelled the world to know.”

 

“Well, Tory, I’ve travelled the entire world. I’ve seen them all and none of them compare to this one,” Uluru stated softly yet emphatically.

 

Tory felt the honey of the deep toned voice stroke his soul and he felt himself relaxing again. He did not reply though, as the presence of the man beside him seem to be clouding his mind.

 

“This is a magnificent night. One might say, magical,” Uluru said.

 

“It is. Warm summer nights have always been my favourite nights,” Tory replied unconsciously while suddenly feeling at ease.

 

Uluru asked, continuing to put Tory at ease with a personable discourse, “What about your favoured type of day?”

 

“When I was younger I loved hot summer days but as I’m getting older, I now have a preference for the perfect, spring-like days,” Tory answered.

 

“I still like the hot days,” Uluru said, “however that could have something to do with the fact that I was born in the red centre.”

 

Tory associated the information with the dark skin and asked, “Are you indigenous?”

 

“I am,” Uluru replied.

 

“You’re not like any indigenous Australian I’ve ever met. No offence intended,” he said.

 

Uluru smiled softly and said, “None taken but what is it that you think sets me apart?”

 

“I guess it was a silly thing to say because there’s nothing in particular, other than maybe your eyes but I think it’s more a feeling,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru raised an eyebrow and said, “A feeling? What does it feel like?”

 

“That’s the point. I mean it’s more like something I’ve never felt before,” Tory said questioningly.

 

Uluru asked, “Is it good or bad, Tory?”

 

“It’s good. I mean, it’s engaging, even enticing,” Tory tried to explain.

 

“Now that’s a compliment I’ve never received,” Uluru said.

 

Tory’s words were not specifically meant as a compliment but still they brought a warm smile to Uluru’s face. He lifted his left hand and gently placed it on Tory’s right shoulder. He squeezed softly though briefly, before sliding his arm back onto the wall.

 

Uluru gazed at Tory and Tory was gazing back at him. The look that passed between them was screaming in prophetic silence. Both men somehow knew in that moment, the opposing stranger caressed their deepest hope within. Both also felt that the other could quell an ache that had been frozen in time.

 

For the first time in his life, Uluru felt like he was not in control of an encounter with a man. It unsettled him and he had to look away. He stared at a distant edge of the harbour, his face revealing disbelief. The sad man had somehow reached inside of him and touched his soul without a word.

 

Uluru looked back at Tory and he felt overwhelmed. An extent of feeling he had never felt with any other man, made him want to sweep this sad man off his feet and carry him away, literally. “This should not be happening,” he thought, however, he also wanted to speak the truth immediately and forgo the usual preamble.

 

Uluru’s heart began to pound with excitement but a habitual belief that his path would never change, caused him to embrace his doubt and slap the hopeful feelings away. He wanted to believe but he changed the tone of his mind to betray the tone of his heart. Seeking proof while regaining control in redirection, he replied to one of Tory’s previous remarks.

 

“If you want directness from me as you requested, then clarify the anomaly of the man you’ve become. Tory, you say the colour of your heart is black but you make no effort to breathe life and light into it. You accept the emptiness as a natural condition and do nothing to change it. You’re determined and unwilling to capitulate but it seems that is exactly what you’ve done. You appear as a man who does not know who he is.”

 

Tory was both shocked and irritated. Uluru’s words could not have been more accurate if Tory had described himself. He did not understand how Uluru could know but it bothered him that he did.

 

“Time can be a cruel warden. It’s also a curse that feeds habit when it comes to re-writing a scene,” Tory said, hoping his remark was cryptic enough to divert Uluru from his uncanny accuracy. Tory paused in thought.

 

Uluru was stunned by the remark. It hit him and entered his body, reverberating through the plexus of his nervous system, telling him he was looking into a type of mirror.

 

“I don’t understand this,” Tory continued, “you don’t know me and I know you’ve never met me. How can you possibly know these deeply personal and private things about me?”

 

Tory had every right to ask that question and Uluru knew it. In some ways he knew as much about Tory as Tory knew himself. The more intensely Tory felt and thought, the more Uluru knew. He did not know all the answers but they were flowing into his mind thick and fast.

 

Uluru knew Tory was asking a serious question but he also knew there was a degree of avoidance as well. He sensed Tory’s desire to dissuade him from his questioning course and so he did not respond to the question, he just stared at Tory and waited silently for a reply.

 

There was a degree of the student receiving an authoritative glare from the principle and Tory could not avoid feeling unsettled. He felt like he had to respond, as the gaze of Uluru’s extraordinary eyes drilled into his.

 

Tory said reactively, “I know exactly who I am.”

 

Uluru responded almost sarcastically, “Is that so?”

 

Tory replied with an enforced confidence, “It is!”

 

Aware of the pretence, Uluru said, “Then why have you chosen so absolute a path when you’re uncertain if it will give you what you desire?”

 

Tory was stunned. He assumed Uluru was again referring to his most recent decision. He wondered if he was reading into Uluru’s words but still they were so specific and directed. He felt angry with the stranger for knowing and oddly, he also felt betrayed by life for allowing someone to know such a private choice.

 

“Perhaps my choice is a path to what I want but if it isn’t, it will give me peace from the exhausting nature of the existence I’ve come to know,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru nodded. Now he understood the basis of the man’s choice but he pushed further, asking, “Why not choose a different path instead?”

 

“Enough,” Tory yelled in frustration. “Tell me how it is that you know what is hidden in my mind, as if I had told you in conversation? To whom have you been talking?”

 

“All things are connected, Tory. I’ve spoken to no one. I sense your thoughts and feelings. I can hear your true voice.”

 

“That isn’t possible,” Tory replied.

 

“There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, then are dreamt of in your philosophy,” Uluru quoted, completing with a soft smile.

 

Tory huffed and said, “I’m not a toy, why are you playing with me?”

 

“This is not play, Tory. It is a slow unveiling. I will reveal one thing immediately. Though our natures are different, in a certain way we have become the same. We are both lonely and have spent our days and nights searching for someone. In you I see the possibility to remove that sameness so we could express our differences together. I desire to bring you into my world.”

 

“Do you even hear the things you say and how you say them? People don’t speak like that,” Tory said.

 

Knowing they had never met, Tory wondered how Uluru could know they were walking a similar path. The whisper of mistrust and doubt cried out in Tory’s consciousness but then floated away like a feather on the wind. Tory looked at him with uncertainty but he felt intrigue with the idea of spending time with Uluru. A strange thought told him the man was true and also a relentless soul. None of it, not any of what was happening made sense to Tory and certainly Uluru’s answers made no sense either.

 

Uluru stepped away from the wall, increasing the distance between them and then he turned and looked at Tory directly. He felt an innate pull toward Tory that intrigued him but then he watched with satisfaction as Tory unconsciously took a step closer. Uluru knew he emanated an allure that was sexually arousing and emotionally trustworthy. It drew men in, however, his sharpened senses told him this was more than that.

 

“I see your tears have ceased and the ache has fallen victim to our encounter. It pleases me I’ve had a positive effect and subdued the empty feeling. It’s a good sign that you could be the one, the first and the man I desire you to be.”

 

Tory did not hear the last words because he was distracted by the previous. He realised his pain had eased into a deep background and his tears were no longer flowing. He looked at Uluru bewildered.

 

A moment later, the feeling of need that had seemed somehow unreal, began to evolve into a hunger for Uluru. It was not only strange that it was happening but also, it was the speed and the sense of urgency, which made Tory feel like he was falling in love. In those moments, which to his rational mind seemed delusional, all his blue considerations faded into insignificance and suddenly Uluru became all-important.

 

Uluru sensed the growing connection and smiled. The smile caused his exceptional face to exceed its own beauty. A medium sized though shapely mouth opened to reveal strong, white teeth, embraced in a frame of dark, red lips. His eyes grew to completely reveal his sky blue irises, which seemed to carry an otherworldly illumination.

 

Uluru had often been conquered by beauty but he knew as handsome as Tory was, there was more between them than met the eye. Something more ethereal was influencing him and it was clutching at his heart. In the past with every other man, he left it to time to grow a shared love. However, here on this night, something extraordinary was happening and he felt like they were both at the mercy of a greater power.

 

Seeing the awe in Tory’s eyes as he looked at him with unceasing focus, Uluru stepped closer. He wrapped an arm around Tory and turned them toward the water. He moved them back to the wall, however, with Uluru now the cynosure of not only Tory’s gaze but also his heart and mind, Tory did not even register that they were floating instead of walking. Once again they were leaning against the sandstone.

 

Uluru was aware of the change in Tory. He could see the way Tory looked at him, feel his body’s reaction when he touched Tory and he could sense the walls of Tory’s heart falling away. He could also hear Tory’s silent thoughts of desire.

 

Uluru’s arm remained around Tory, his hand caressing as it grazed up and down his back. The warmth was overwhelming and Tory’s blood began to heat. He turned and looked at the face beside his, already looking at him. Their eyes connected and locked. Tory could not turn away but he also did not want to. His eyes were being drawn, pulled like they were caught in a magnetic field. He felt like he was imprisoned and unable to escape but again, he knew he wanted to remain at Uluru’s side.

 

“I want to kiss you, touch you and taste you. I want to melt into your skin and become part of you,” Tory thought.

 

This sudden depth of feeling and desire for Uluru, stood in direct violation of Tory’s implacable, principled choice. It made no sense even though Uluru was the most incredibly handsome and intriguing man he had ever met. Uluru may have been a magnificent specimen of man and he may have been able to get under Tory’s sexual skin and caress his emotional heart, however, Uluru also frustrated Tory because of his inexplicable knowledge. It seemed like Uluru was telepathic. It felt unfair and wrong for one person to have such power over another.

 

There was no threat but innately Tory felt threatened. He knew Uluru was somehow chipping away at the fortress he had built around his heart. Self-protectively, even though he knew it was not true, he decided that what he was experiencing with Uluru was no different to when he had felt overwhelming attraction and lust for a man. He told himself that what he was feeling was that sense of desire to release all control and to dive into a frenetic sexual encounter with no strings attached. He had done it when he was younger and he knew how delicious it could be.

 

Tory was not wrong because his attraction to Uluru was like a drug pulling him into addiction. However, in that moment he remembered how hot hook-ups with magnificent men were not capable of satisfying him. He wanted a long-term partner and nothing less. Subsequently, he intellectually stamped the situation as puerile and pointless.

 

Uluru sensed Tory’s intransient thoughts and his hand instantly stopped moving over Tory’s back. His fingers arched in a grip-like manner and tightened through the shirt against Tory’s skin and then he drew him closer. In a split second their lips were touching and suddenly the stranger’s tongue was in Tory’s mouth.

 

Tory fell into what felt like a magical consummation. He felt like his body was floating and he could not open his eyes. He felt his body turning, he felt the huge chest of a powerful man pressing against him and he felt the kiss deepen and fill with passion. For what seemed like an eternity, he could barely breathe.

 

The darkness behind Tory’s eyes became tangible and he felt like he was wrapt in feathers and wool, until he could hear and feel nothing of reality. All he was certain of was Uluru, his lips caressing his lips and as the man’s magnificent arms held him, Tory was becoming hard.

 

A culmination of feelings made Tory melt to his core. His tactile senses sang in dulcet tones of extraordinary sensuality and his heart was beating in chorus, as he thought he was experiencing pure love. It was like he was in a dream heaven.

 

Horrifically and unexpectedly, like being torn savagely from joy, Tory felt the ground beneath his feet. Initially it was vague but then the hardness of concrete became harder than ever before. He then heard the sound of the water against the wall but its gentle lapping now sounded like anguished screaming. He felt the air on his skin and it was like cruel, sharp fingernails scratching torturously. He wanted to go back to that world of bliss but he knew he was returning to reality. He opened his eyes but though it was night, it seemed so harsh and painful.

 

Confused, Tory realised he was in the previous position, leaning on the wall. Uluru was still beside him, which was relieving, however, Tory hated that he was not in Uluru’s arms. He felt the manly hand still rubbing his back. His eyes were staring into those exceptional eyes, which gave him peace from the lost kiss. Tory wondered if the kiss had happened at all. He wanted to ask but before he had the chance, Uluru spoke.

 

“Tory, if you could have the existence you desire, one that did not contain the pain you have come to know and embrace, what would it be?”

 

The moment Uluru posed the question; Tory’s first thought was to spend his life with Uluru, to be in his arms and to taste that kiss, real or imagined, forever. However, as if all the previous feelings had been part of a dream, his rational mind dismissed the thought.

 

Tory’s second thought was that like all the men that desired him, Uluru would say and do anything for sex and it would be all that mattered. There would be no emotional substance and nothing would change. It was a confirmation of the reason Tory was alone. He did not want to engage in meaningless sex. In his mind it was second best. Tory wanted his fantasy, his ideal. He wanted till death do us part.

 

“I would want a life of love, passion and fulfilment. I would want a life of freedom from the limitations placed on a man’s desires. I would want a creative life. All of what I want would be based on a man to share my life. Someone I could talk to, really talk to and someone who would understand who I really am. I would want to bathe in sensuality, thrill in the arms of a powerful man and above all, to know he loved me and would never turn away from me,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru smiled and said, “A simple life.”

 

“Simple? Don’t patronise me, Uluru. I know it’s a fairytale but you asked me what I wanted and that is my answer,” Tory growled.

 

“I was not patronising you, Tory. What you seek you can have. For you however, you don’t believe it’s possible, let alone simple. You believe that in this life your desire is idealistic and fantasy and so, when I speak as if you can have what you want, you label me patronising.”

 

Tory glared at Uluru for his accuracy once again. Uluru was right but Tory felt like his privacy had been invaded. Somehow the man knew his thoughts, his feelings and now he knew the truths he struggled to admit. He wanted to ask how he knew but then he thought the man’s answers were answerless. He hated that Uluru was right but he also knew he had taken his irritation out on him, a stranger who had nothing to do with his choices.

 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you, Uluru. You’re right. In effect I accused you of laughing at me but it was me who was laughing at myself.”

 

“Tory, why would you laugh at your own dream?”

 

“Why? Probably because I don’t believe it’s truly possible,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru shook his head and then asked, “Why not?”

 

“I’m not seeking marriage in the traditional sense. I’m seeking a true connection. I want a real and honest marriage of two hearts,” Tory clarified.

 

Uluru shrugged indifferently and then asked, “Explain to me why you think something so pure is impossible?”

 

“Don’t you know,” Tory asked sarcastically, based on Uluru always knowing the answers.

 

“Actually, I do. The thing is, though, I’d like to hear you explain it to me in your own thoughts and words,” Uluru said and Tory looked at the man in disbelief.

 

“Fine! Yes I’m a man and therefore this statement will be both incongruous and an extreme generalisation, however, from my experience men want sex and not love. Therefore I don’t believe I can find what I’m looking for,” he explained, his expression disenchanted.

 

“Tory, you know only what you know and therefore you assume nothing more than that which has become familiar, habitual or standard. Why, Tory, when you know so little about the workings of the mind, the heart and the soul, do you feign to know the answers?”

 

Tory asked, “What exactly are you asking me?”

 

“I’m telling you that you assume your answers are true. I’m telling you that even though your experience suggests your answers are true, not every experience will be the same. Therefore, Tory, I’m asking you why you assume all your experiences will be the same?”

 

“Because they always are,” Tory replied.

 

“Always were, Tory,” Uluru corrected.

 

“Whatever,” Tory said with a huff.

 

“Tory, all colours are colours but no colour is the same.”

 

Frustrated, Tory asked, “What?”

 

“All experiences are experiences but no two experiences are the same,” Uluru elaborated.

 

“I can’t argue with that but for me, every man only wanted one thing,” Tory clarified.

 

“Not every man is the same,” Uluru said and Tory almost swooned as Uluru pulled him beneath his arm and held him in a warm grip.

 

“Oh shit,” Tory thought, as he felt Uluru’s touch breaking his resolve and searing at his soul.

 

“Let’s walk,” Uluru said but without waiting for agreement, he moved them north along the shadowed and lonely path, ambling very slowly while holding Tory like a lover against his body.

 

It was extraordinary but in their initial silence as the path moved slowly beneath their feet, the feelings of closeness and need began to grow between them. Their bodies warmed in response to each other’s touch and their minds found an easy and peaceful equanimity, as if what was taking place between them was perfectly natural and normal.

 

Once again Tory believed what was happening made no sense, however, being with Uluru like this, filled him with serenity. It was serenity the likes of which he begged would never end.

 

In those first few moments, Uluru was speechless. His fingers softly squeezed Tory’s waist and he could barely believe the feelings Tory was inciting within his heart. It was ironic because the timeless bubble he was sharing with Tory at that moment, felt exactly like what he had been searching for. Before he reached for his rational control so he could return to his purpose, Uluru silently begged to the power that had created the path, which had long been at his feet. His need, which was surrounded in doubt, questioned the unique course of this night. Despite his doubt he was filled with hope that his instincts were true. He looked up at the stars, knowing that in life there were indeed rare occurrences. He reached for reality and reasoning, returning his mind from his hope and pulling him back to the moment.

 

Uluru wanted Tory to relax because he wanted him to answer a question. Like all of his other questions he already knew the answer, however, for this one in particular, he required Tory to speak the answer out loud.

 

“What if I told you, Tory, you could have what you want and I could deliver it to you. Would you want it?”

 

Regardless of the fact that Tory believed such a thing was impossible, still some deeply embedded ray of hope shone within, which instantly dismissed his human rationality and he said, “Of course!”

 

Uluru nodded but asked, “What if I told you there was a cost? Would you still want it and be prepared to pay?”

 

Tory sighed, thinking there had to be a catch and he said, “It would depend on the cost.”

 

Uluru asked, “How far would you be willing to go? What would you be willing to do or to sacrifice to have your dream?”

 

“I…” Tory began but second-guessing himself he said, “I don’t know?”

 

Uluru replied, “If you know yourself as you say you do then how could you possibly not know your limits?”

 

Tory inhaled angrily before saying, “Must I be stripped naked and my nature be completely disassembled before you will bring us to the point? Let’s agree I know nothing and you know everything, now can we get to the crux of whatever it is you’re dancing around?”

 

“Tory, I’m not here to break you or degrade you or take anything from you that you don’t wish to give. I’m simply trying to help you reach a point where you will be able to make a decision. All I’m asking is what you would be prepared to sacrifice to have what you want?”

 

“I, um, I still don’t know,” Tory lied.

 

“I don’t believe that’s true,” Uluru said.

 

Feigning ignorance, Tory asked, “Why not?”

 

“If it were true, I would say your dream could not be as profoundly important as you tell yourself it is. How could it be so pivotal and critical if you don’t know what you would give or give up to obtain it? How can you say it is what you want more than anything else in life? Tory, your unwillingness to answer is a paradox,” Uluru said.

 

“Why? I don’t understand that,” Tory replied.

 

“You should,” Uluru said.

 

“You seem to know everything else so why don’t you explain it to me,” Tory responded smugly.

 

“As you wish. Tory, as a consequence of your dream not coming true, you made a choice to commit suicide tonight. Tory, why would you take your own life because of the absence of a man and a life you only dream of?”

 

Tory stared at Uluru, lost for words. This time Uluru had not simply inferred he knew of his plan, this time he had stated it directly.

 

Uluru said, “The answer to my question of what you would sacrifice is there, Tory. It’s also the reason I find your refusal to answer to be a paradox. How could you not know the answer when the answer is the choice you made tonight?”

 

Unlike most people, Tory attached no stigma or moral dilemma to rational, adult suicide. He believed it was just another available choice, which existed within the realms of free will. However, when he considered explaining the reason for his choice to Uluru, he expected he would receive the standard human reaction, which he considered naïve, limited and both ego and fear based, because it confronted the moral perspective. Tory was not threatened by that perspective and had always been willing to enter its debate, however, considering his current choice and resolve, it seemed at that moment to be a senseless conversation.

 

Tory had known the answer to Uluru’s question all along. From his heart to his mind he believed he would give his life if it meant a path to his dream. He saw no light at the end of the tunnel of his current life and so he wondered if his choice could lead him to a better life.

 

Tory had no idea what followed death. He suspected nothing and that everything just ended. He was not religious but he was rational and so he knew he could not deny a god or some divine purpose, simply because of his disbelief. Therefore, as a consequence of how supremely unhappy he was, he wanted to believe in the idea of another life, perhaps a better life. He did not necessarily believe in reincarnation but he thought if there was even a chance, his choice to end one life for another seemed as arbitrary as life appeared to be. Subsequently, he thought that as an alternative, it might be a possibility.

 

Tory thought that where Uluru was concerned, though, it would be unwise to be drawn into a subjective conversation on the matter. Uluru seemed sagacious and it made Tory feel somewhat inadequate. Filled with negative pride, he refused to justify his choices to a stranger; at least that was what he told himself. He also was now becoming angry with this man who somehow knew too much. Uluru also seemed to make him feel trapped without an escape. Tory instantly made a decision to shut down and not answer any more questions. He thought it was time for Uluru to give some answers.

 

Tory asked, “How in hell do you know these things about me?”

 

Uluru replied, “You mean, how do I know things like you know the answer to my question but are refusing to speak its truth?”

 

“For fucks sake,” Tory said, frustrated that Uluru would never answer his exact question and yet every answer was true.

 

“Tory, if you know the answer, why is it so hard to answer?”

 

“Because I don’t want you to think I’m a fool. What I’m prepared to give for what I want, may not give me what I want. There’s no certainty and so it’s more about hope than anything.”

 

Uluru nodded but asked, “What if it doesn’t give you what you want?”

 

“Then hopefully that will be the end of the issue,” Tory said.

 

Unwilling to let it end there, Uluru asked, “And if it does give you what you want?”

 

“Again, hopefully it will be the end of the issue,” Tory replied.

 

Nodding again, Uluru said, “So then, as we both now know it’s all based on hope, can you tell me what it is you’re willing to give to make your dream come true?”

 

Irritated, Tory asked, “Why do you need me to say it?”

 

“Tory, allow me to grant your wish,” Uluru said.

 

Tory rolled his eyes and asked, “What are you, a genie?”

 

“All the worlds an ancient lamp and we are all its occupants, however, none of us have the degree or type of magic you speak of,” Uluru replied.

 

“And once again we return to enigmatic replies with a response answering nothing,” Tory grumbled.

 

“Tory, you cannot control everything and you cannot only have what you want. Others come into the equation. Sometimes you must be prepared to trust and let go. If a man could fly but the only way to prove it was true was to jump from the tallest cliff, you would never know if you could. The reason is because you want it handed to you on a silver platter with a guarantee.”

 

“I know. I know my limitations, Uluru. It’s just that I can’t divorce what I want from what I don’t.”

 

Uluru smiled and said, “For the moment, let’s forget the other question and answer me another instead. What is it that you don’t want to be a part of your dream?”

 

Tory did not even have to think. Years of reasons came into his mind and he immediately said, “I don’t want to be used. I don’t want to be abused. I don’t want to be deceived and I don’t want to be told I’m loved when I’m not, just so another can take until there’s nothing left. I don’t want to be abandoned. I know it’s a joke but I want love till death. I want forever love and companionship and I want it bound in passion, loyalty and happiness.”

 

“It’s possible for you to have what you want with the negation of what you don’t,” Uluru said with implacable certainty.

 

“You feed me a sparrow’s bite but I need a man’s meal, Uluru.”

 

“Trust me, Tory.”

 

“I want to, Uluru. I don’t know why but I want to give you everything you want, more than I even understand. The problem is that a warning bell is ringing inside of me. It’s my caution bell, my amber light and I’m afraid where this will lead me.”

 

“It’s not just caution, Tory, it’s fear as well. You’re afraid of risk and because of all the years of missed opportunities and all the years of loneliness, taking a chance has become David without his slingshot against Goliath. Failure is all you can imagine.

 

“It seems incongruous that you would take the ultimate step without fear and yet trusting another is terrifying for you. Ironically, it isn’t so strange. You trust yourself to take your life into the absolute unknown but you will not put your life into the hands of another. The reason is because with one you don’t know what to imagine and with the other, you expect what you know all too well.”

 

“What if my dream is nothing more than foolish whim? I’m afraid of the pain if I let someone in,” Tory admitted.

 

“Tory, you’re already in pain,” Uluru said.

 

“I know but… Oh, I don’t know,” he said, now feeling confused.

 

“Yes you do,” Uluru pushed.

 

“I don’t,” Tory grumbled contrarily.

 

Pushing harder, Uluru asked, “How far would you be willing to go? What are you willing to give for the love of your life?”

 

“I don’t know,” Tory yelled in frustration.

 

“Tory, your decision suggests you do but still you won’t say the words.”

 

Again Tory asked, “Why does it need to be said out loud?”

 

“Tory, if I were an angel sent by God, would you tell me what you would do for your dream?”

 

“It would make no difference because if there is a god, he hasn’t done a bang up job as far as I’m concerned,” Tory replied.

 

Continuing, Uluru asked, “If I was a monster and I threatened to rip the life out of you, would you tell me?”

 

“Out of fear, there’s more likelihood there,” Tory said, laughing as if his answer was a joke.

 

Trying another tact, Uluru asked, “If I was the man of your dreams, to be forever yours, would you tell me?”

 

Tory replied indifferently, “Well that has to be the most unlikely of the three possibilities and so yes, I probably would.”

 

Taken aback, Uluru asked, “Why would that option be the most unlikely?”

 

“Why do you think? It’s as you said. Deep down I don’t believe it will happen. I’m alone and will always be alone,” Tory replied honestly.

 

Through Tory’s answer, Uluru could now see the man he truly was, a truth hidden beneath a pale façade. Uluru understood how men had depleted Tory, ignoring his heart until the flames of belief and hope began to burn out. It was the way of life but Uluru was certain Tory could be revived. He wanted to reignite the flame and he believed that if what was happening on this night was real, maybe Tory was the one after all. Still, Uluru knew the words must be spoken out loud.

 

“Tory, you assume life as you see it and know it. You assume it is only what you have come to accept. What if there were more to this world and to reality, things that you and most people believe are nothing more than fiction. You don’t believe in mermaids but though you could never know what lies beneath the majority of the world’s surface, still you assume these creatures are no more then myth and legend.”

 

Tory turned and looked at Uluru with a shocked expression and asked, “Are you saying they’re not and that they do exist?”

 

“Neither that they do or they don’t,” Uluru replied.

 

Tory asked, “Then what?”

 

“It was a metaphor for the baseless presumptions you entertain. Tory, for forty years you have lived in dreams of what could be but early you began to believe nothing of what you desired was available. You believed this because you realised sex could be both delicious yet empty. As a consequence, unlike the majority, you chose to refuse to accept anything that did not mirror your requirements exactly. You became stubborn, fixed and exceedingly immutable in expectation. Some would say you deserve what you got.”

 

Tory’s expression saddened a little and he asked, “Is that what you would say?”

 

“No, Tory, I would say you were on the right track. I would say it is time people in this world stopped settling for as good as they believe they can get. It is my belief that if everyone said no to what they didn’t want, eventually life would begin to offer what they did. Why though, would life offer what is required when everyone is so willing to accept what is not?

 

“I guess it wouldn’t,” Tory surmised.

 

“Tory, you’re already fully aware of what you want in life. You’ve achieved everything you’ve aspired to, everything except your greatest desire of love and a relationship with the man of your dreams. You wanted it so badly you stopped and waited for it to come to you, even though you didn’t realise that was what you were doing. You believed in what you believed so staunchly, you denied yourself what most others accept. In that belief you were willing to cut off your nose in spite of your face and tonight as a consequence of years of deprivation, you decided to end it all.

 

“Tory, I know better than most that life is not just what we think, feel and see. I quoted Shakespeare to you earlier and let me tell you, Hamlet’s words to Horatio were true. You, on the other hand, you’re so caught up in the thought of the moment, in your expectation of it, rather than in the experience of an actual moment. You fear what might be, instead of enjoying what will be.”

 

Again Tory shook his head in disbelief and he asked, “How do you know all of this?”

 

“Does it really matter? Tory, what I’ve just said is the reason why I told you I didn’t believe that you don’t know how far you’re willing to go. Of course you know what you’d give. How could you not with the choice you made tonight? It seems to me that you’re willing to give up everything you have because you don’t believe you can have what you want. Will you at least agree with that?”

 

With a soft, resigned voice Tory replied, “Yes.”

 

“Surely then, that is how far you’ll go and what you’re willing to sacrifice; your life itself. The thing is that because you don’t know what the outcome will be, you don’t feel threatened by what you don’t know. You’re prepared to do it regardless of the possibility you’ll get nothing in return. I’m offering what you want for a blind sacrifice and yet, even though there is the offer of great possibility, still you deny me as well,” Uluru said.

 

Tory asked with frustration, “Why do you ask the questions if you already know the answers, Uluru?”

 

“You’re angry with me,” Uluru said.

 

“Why wouldn’t I be? You have invaded my being and you know me when you shouldn’t. The point I had reached tonight should have been private and left to a moment’s decision. Instead, I find myself doubting everything I thought and now my heart and desires are in another place altogether,” Tory said.

 

Uluru glanced down at Tory, happy to hear the inference in his last words. He begged silently that this man could be the one and then he turned his head and looked up at the night sky, whispering to Tory, “Does that place seem so frightening?”

 

Tory turned his head and looked up at Uluru. He knew the place both he and Uluru were referring to was Uluru himself. Tory thought it was unfair that Uluru had such an advantage but he also found excitement in the idea that Uluru might want him as well.

 

Tory could not stop thinking how strongly he felt and how much he wanted to be with the man holding him. He turned away and both men stopped in unison. In silence, they stared at the water thoughtfully.

 

Despite the intensity of the nature of their conversation, one thing remained constant throughout. Both men were becoming closer and their feelings for each other were growing at an impossible rate.

 

Anticipation filled Uluru. This was like no other time and Tory was like no other man. He could feel that without the days, weeks or months of time, Tory was already considering being with him. The usual building of trust and love was occurring in seconds and minutes. Time was flying in no time at all and Uluru could only hope it was leading where he desired.

 

Tory felt the nervousness of his stomach, the tightness in his chest and the hunger in his heart. He also felt that feeling when desire and lust for physical connection were growing. He was a man and often aroused but this was the growth of insatiable need, the type he had distanced himself from for years. He already wanted Uluru but he knew if he did not walk away immediately, he would never escape what was becoming a burning. It really made no sense, particularly with how frustrating Uluru could be; however, he wanted this man like he had never wanted anything in his life.

 

In a moment of true magic that neither man expected, like puppets on strings they both suddenly turned in a synchronous action. Their eyes filled with heat, they embraced and then they kissed in the most tender of moments. Hearts beat, hands caressed and sighs of sensation and satisfaction filled their mouths. When the kiss ended, Uluru held Tory and again he stared up at the night sky, questioning silently if what was happening was real.

 

Silence continued to take precedence but it continued even when once again they walked. The men were little more than strangers but something was happening that was subtle and gradual but so inexorable.

 

From the first moment he sensed Tory’s presence, even before he heard his thoughts, Uluru became distracted. It had seemed the very fabric of time and space fluttered like turbulence around him, leading him to this man. Throughout his history, Uluru always sensed possibilities but on this night with this man, he felt something so different he did not want to let him go, even if he were required to. This man called to him in a way no other had.

 

Only an hour had fallen into history but now the beat of Uluru’s heart told him he was falling fast and deep. Uluru had loved powerfully and heartbreakingly but all of those loves had happened over long periods of time. This love was growing beyond his comprehension. The pumping of his blood through his heart had almost convinced him Tory was the one, finally.

 

Tory could not relinquish the grip of his arm from around Uluru’s body. He wanted to and thought he should but he was afraid to let go of the man who touched his heart and made him feel hope for the first time in years. It was one more thing that made no sense to him. He could not have admitted it out loud but he felt like he had fallen in love, completely.

 

Despite his frustration that Uluru knew his truth, Tory now felt relaxed in Uluru’s presence but his heart was beating like he was scared out of his mind. A sense told him this was his chance but to him these days, just as Uluru had known, risk for him was truly terrifying.

 

The path they walked had turned from north to west and though the scene was similar, it had changed. One of the most well known sights in the world stood like a life size post card before them but neither took any notice of the uniqueness of the opera house or the immensity of the bridge.

 

The side of Tory’s face was now pressed against Uluru’s chest and his arm was still wrapped around Uluru’s waist. He had sunken into a comfortable acceptance of the stranger, a man who was becoming less a stranger and more a vital appendage to his future.

 

Uluru’s right arm wrapped around Tory’s body as it held him close and firm. If someone had seen them, they could not have been mistaken for anything other than gay lovers taking a romantic walk alone in the night.

 

Tory thought on Uluru’s enigmatic offer to bring him into his world and then he stopped and stepped away, turning to look into those exquisite eyes.

 

From this new position on the harbour’s edge, all the additional lights from the north of the city illuminated Uluru’s face. Tory looked at it and he noticed his skin. It was dark like many a skin throughout the world. People called it black but Tory held a different opinion. He thought dark skin was variant shades of brown.

 

As he looked at Uluru’s brown skin he knew two things instantly but one seem to cancel the other out as even possible. First he was certain Uluru was an indigenous Australian. He then looked closer and he realised the skin was different. It was not the colour; it was the perfection that caught his attention. It seemed somehow inhuman and it also gleamed. Tory took a step closer and he stretched out his arm, the tips of his fingers sliding down Uluru’s cheek and around his jaw. Uluru remained motionless, allowing the revealing touch.

 

All Tory could think to compare with the sensation at his fingertips, was the smoothness and temperature of liquid mercury. Uluru’s skin was cool but as if it absorbed the heat from his fingers, it became beautifully warm instantly. It felt like skin but at the same time it felt unique. It was simply too smooth. He could feel no whiskers and it was not a matter of the perfect shave.

 

Tory let his hand drop slowly as he stared at Uluru’s skin. Pieces of their time together began to paint a picture. After everything he had experienced and now with the touch of his skin and the sight of those eyes, Tory knew with certainty that Uluru was not exactly a man, at least not as he knew a man to be. He did not know what he was but by this point, he was not afraid and to his own surprise, he could find no reason to care.

 

He took another step closer and wrapped his arms around Uluru’s large body. He laid his face on the big chest, closed his eyes and then let his hands roam. The form beneath the suit was definitely of human male but the frame and the musculature felt stronger than any man he had ever held before. He thought he should have been at least tentative but instead, when he felt Uluru unexpectedly dragging at his shirt, Tory allowed Uluru to remove the shirt from his body and then pull him into a tight embrace.

 

Tory’s heart was crumbling from his own need and desires. Magic was definitely happening, however, it was Tory’s hunger for the love of this man that was crushing his disbelief, as well as dismissing his doubt and his fear of taking a risk. The thought was still in his mind that if he gave himself to Uluru, he would be betraying his integrity and probity but all he could think was he might have found in this man, his last chance for love.

 

Uluru could stand it no longer. He wanted Tory in every way. No matter what was happening, Tory was not walking away and had in fact walked back into his arms. At that moment, as he touched the naked skin of Tory’s back, Uluru thought he needed his answer or his desperateness would obliterate him.

 

Tory was certain Uluru was different but the moment he felt the large hands caressing his now shirtless skin, the state of bliss began to re-emerge. His eyes closed naturally and he felt Uluru’s strong arms encircle him and tighten. He felt his feet leave the ground as Uluru lifted him upwards, his body grazing over Uluru’s body and then his lips on Uluru’s lips. The dominant tongue slid gracefully into Tory’s mouth and suddenly he was lying on a fluffy cloud of the purest love, a thick and heavy erection pressing against him.

 

Tory was back in his dream heaven and he tightened his arms around Uluru’s body. The sensuality, the heat and the love were overwhelming. This was even more then he had ever imagined or hoped for. It seemed beyond real, beyond fantasy but he was bound willingly and he could not bear for it to end.

 

His eyes still closed, unknown to Tory while lost in Uluru’s kiss, with astonishing speed they rose into the air, their combined embrace making them soar like a missile into the dark.

 

The kiss that encapsulated his hearts desire continued but even as tongues duelled, Tory heard Uluru’s voice in his mind and he knew it was the soundless voice he had heard in the beginning.

 

“I have waited so long for you, for this urgent hunger to receive my love. I have waited to be kissed with such heat and I have waited to be held like you hold me. Beyond all, though, I have waited to be needed like you need me. I have been so alone and so it is your solitude and your pain that I recognise and understand. You could be my first, the one. I want to fill you in every way you want to be filled but first, Tory, speak,” Uluru said from his mind.

 

Tory asked, “What are you?”

 

Avoiding the answer he knew Uluru wanted, Tory had asked that question to change the subject while learning something he felt he needed to know. He also realised as they kissed, somehow he too was speaking without voice.

 

Uluru asked again, firmly, “What are you willing to sacrifice?”

 

“I need to know what you are,” Tory said.

 

“No, you only want to know,” Uluru replied.

 

Tory asked, “Why must everything be a mystery?”

 

Uluru replied, “Why should there be no mystery?”

 

“Please, Uluru, make it easy,” Tory begged.

 

Behind his closed eyes, Tory saw Uluru smile and then heard him say, “My beautiful man, it’s as easy as you make it but again, what would you give?”

 

Stubbornly, Tory said, “I don’t know.”

 

“You do and you know you do. I have spoken the words for you but you must do the same for me,” Uluru said.

 

“What you ask, Uluru, is for me to centre stage my truth to another, to allow my vulnerability.”

 

“Perhaps that is the solution to your dream coming true,” Uluru suggested.

 

Tory asked, “Are you real?”

 

“I am but I can be even more real for you, Tory.”

 

Tory wondered if he had already taken his life and if Uluru was an angel and so he asked, “Who are you?”

 

Uluru replied, “I am your unexpected opportunity. Then again, perhaps you’re mine?”

 

“Will you leave me, Uluru?”

 

Uluru said, “Do you want forever?”

 

“Yes,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru asked, “How much do you yearn?”

 

Tory parted from the kiss, his eyes revealing his desperate need for release from the life he created and also wanted to end. He looked deeply into Uluru’s eyes pleadingly but he was begging to nobody and nothing that this man could be the answer.

 

Uluru leaned forward and brushed his lips over Tory’s and then slid his tongue back into his mouth. The kiss was brief but so soft and exquisite and then again their lips parted, as he eased his head back to speak out loud.

 

“How much do you yearn,” he repeated softly, his words like silk to Tory’s ears.

 

“I would die,” Tory finally said.

 

Uluru smiled and then he kissed him again, his silent voice returning to fill Tory’s mind.

 

“What is it you would die for, Tory? Your dream?”

 

“If my dream were you, yes,” Tory said.

 

Seeking confirmation, Uluru asked, “You would give yourself to me?”

 

“Yes,” Tory agreed.

 

Uluru said, “Completely?”

 

“Yes,” Tory said.

 

For the sake of his own disbelief, Uluru asked, “Without limitation?”

 

“Yes,” Tory replied.

 

Uluru broke their kiss tenderly. As he pulled his head back he opened his eyes and looked at Tory. Tory’s face was utterly serene and Uluru said, “Open your eyes, my love.”

 

Tory suddenly felt a chill wind over his bare skin. He opened his eyes slowly. Again he was looking directly into Uluru’s eyes but then he noticed the movement around him and he turned his head slightly. For the first time Tory realised where they were and what was happening. They were flying.

 

The earth was beneath him but dropping away and it seemed a billion stars surrounded him while remaining distant. He looked down but the lights of Sydney were dots in the dark without relevance. He felt fear of their speed and height and he gripped Uluru tighter but then turned back to the warmth and safety of his eyes. Uluru smiled and again nothing mattered to Tory.

 

“My beautiful man, is all you have thought and felt with me, is this that I show you now whilst knowing there is even more to come, is it enough of a taste to trust me to give you forever?”

 

Tory did not respond with words or thought, he simply leaned in and he kissed Uluru with a feverish ardour. As their connection deepened in swift and spectacular fashion, behind Tory’s closed eyes he saw Uluru’s smile and he heard a joyous laugh. A moment later, Uluru once again curtailed the kiss in a gentle manner.

 

“I ask you to let me be the one, Tory. Let me be the one you will give yourself to and the one whose life you will embrace. It is yours if you want it as much as I want to give it to you. First, though, I give you one last chance to change your mind and walk away. Say the word and with sadness I will return you to your night. Say otherwise and I will take your breath away and show you another world. What do you want?”

 

Tory could barely take his eyes off the man who held him. He was so handsome Tory thought it seemed impossible. He turned and realised they had stopped rising. He could actually see the edge of the earth’s atmosphere surrounding the globe. The stars seemed as if he could reach out and pluck them from space.

 

He glanced down. Off in the west, far in the distance, he could see where the night met the day. The earth’s sky and ocean were so blue, so beautiful and magical and all life’s horrors seemed hidden beneath that majesty. He was struck dumb by the astonishing events but as he turned and looked back at Uluru, it all faded into insignificance.

 

“You,” Tory said and that was all.

 

Uluru smiled and this time his lips parted wider. His smooth, brown face, filled with coursing, heated blood, a radiance adding to its gleaming nature. His eyes brightened, though it would have seemed impossible and now his rugged handsomeness was magnificent. From that moment, only one thing altered and Tory watched as the sharpest, glistening white fangs, extended. A split second later, they slid painlessly into Tory’s throat.

 

Fiction was all Tory had as a reference to what was happening but it seemed nothing could be expected. He saw no ugly or monstrous face. The fangs looked like teeth except they were longer and sharper. There was absolutely no pain and only a slight pressure as his blood passed into Uluru’s mouth. Tory thought he should have been terrified and screaming for someone to save him but instead, he thought his past, his present and his future were about to become one and bring him home.

 

Uluru’s left arm still encircled Tory’s body, holding him tight in a safe embrace. His right palm was flat against Tory’s cheek with his strong fingers stretched wide, holding Tory’s head in a singular position. Uluru’s lips were airtight against his throat while his tongue lapped in the pool of thick blood.

 

Amidst all of this, Uluru’s body began to turn in the air until it appeared he was lying on his back. Tory felt the shifting of his weight and suddenly he was resting on top of the huge, floating body.

 

Tory was in a sensual, sexual bliss. His entire body was quivering with desire and his manhood was harder than he believed was possible. It was throbbing but exceptional. He could also feel the impressive hardness of Uluru.

 

Tory felt no fear of his pounding heart. He knew his blood loss was the reason but it was not the physical pounding that held his attention. It was the explosiveness of his emotions that consumed him, as his love for Uluru grew beyond his comprehension.

 

As he lay atop the magnificent man, his arms still locked around Uluru, Tory could feel Uluru’s hand caressing the skin of his back. It was the most wonderful feeling of pleasure.

 

Less than twenty seconds had ticked by as Uluru fed in a way he never had. His thoughts were for Tory and not of himself, as he drew the feast into his body with a slow and loving consideration.

 

Tory opened his eyes. The surface of the earth seemed farther beneath him than he had ever seen from a plane. Dotting stripes of coloured lights created some sort of map in the darkness below. He lifted his gaze and he saw the stars closer than ever before, even though he could still breathe. As beautiful as it all was, his thoughts could not escape his need or desire for Uluru, even though he now believed he was killing him.

 

Tory knew that on this night he had reached the depths of his despair. He had already chosen and so this was simply an unexpected alternative. He thought it was better this way because despite Uluru’s deceit, which had made him think they would be together for the rest of their lives, still what he was experiencing and feeling was the most delicious fantasy he could have ever imagined. He was in the arms of the most beautiful and most masculine man, he had fallen in love with the man more deeply and quickly than he believed was possible and finally, though it made no sense, he believed the man loved him too. In a way, he wished this was not the end, he wished there could be more and he wished he could be with Uluru forever. Even so, he was resigned. This was the perfect dream to conclude his life.

 

“I don’t know who you are. Perhaps you’re the angel you spoke of but in a variation on a theme, instead you’re a dark angel. You’re my dark prince. I should hate you and resent you but I don’t. You’ve deceived me but I love you, Uluru. Thank you,” he said and then he allowed his eyelids to close. He saw black and then saw red all around him, as if there was nothing else, however, moments later, his world was again consumed by black.

 

“My love,” Uluru said and it was the last thing that Tory heard, as he and his reality faded into a void of the senses. He believed it was his final moment and then with what he thought was his final breath; he believed he was surely dead.