Finding Love: A Journey – II
By: Scotty
(© 2008 by the author)

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

 

Chapter 1

After the meeting with Dr. Oliphant and Dr. Norris, which was very positive for Brad, I was thrilled because it meant that he could continue with more rigorous physical therapy.  Dr. Oliphant even indicated that because Brad had been healing so quickly and so well, that perhaps he could start practice, especially if the coach could assure that he wouldn’t be tackled or involved in any rough stuff.  I remembered Brad’s smile when he heard that, but I wasn’t sure if he smiled because he was happy he could begin some modified practice or if he already knew what the coach would say about rough stuff.

It was now October and my birthday was quickly approaching.  No one had made any mention of it which made me a little suspicious.  Brad only told me, “I’m trying to think of what would make you a great birthday present.  I haven’t had much luck, but maybe a great night in bed would suffice.”

“Bull shit, buddy, I can get that any time I show a little interest in your body, so forget that.  I want something substantial: maybe a new car, the latest laptop, an iphone, something like that.”  Brad looked at me and laughed,

“You must think I’m a wealthy man  rather than a poor high school senior who doesn’t have enough cash to take you to a really nice restaurant or a show in West Palm, so you’d better rethink your desires.

I laughed, kissed my lover, and told him, “You, Sweetcakes, are the only thing I desire.”  That was a mistake.  Thank God we were in my suite, because Brad literally attacked me, but I was able to fend him off.  I giggled as I told him,

“I think I’ll save some of this hot sex just in case I don’t get what I want for my birthday.  Having you fuck me will be fine.”

“Oh, no, Jake, not so.  If I have to give sex for your birthday present, then you will have to fuck me.  No questions asked.”

“Sure, sure, sure.  We’ll see.”  There was a knock at the door.

“Yes?”

“Can I come in?” asked Adam.

“Sure!” Brad told him.

We didn’t move off the bed, so when Adam came into the room, he smirked at both of us.  “I bet you  two horny guys were making out and probably thinking of having sex, and I spoiled it.  I’ll get out of here.”

I laughed, “No need to leave, Adam, because I told Brad there would be no sex until my birthday.”

Brad winked at Adam, saying, “That’s what he thinks.  You know, Adam, he’s so weak around me.  He does whatever I ask whenever I ask.”  Adam began to laugh.

“I bet he does, Brad.  Jacob doesn’t take orders from anyone, so I doubt he takes them from you.  I do know he loves you, Brad, and because he does, in the right situation he would do what you asked of him.”

“Maybe,” I said as I pulled Adam onto the bed with us.  He snuggled up to me and kissed Brad on the forehead.  Brad kissed him back as did I.  Brad was laughing as he told Adam,
“We know.  We know.  You’re not gay.  But we love you, guy, a whole lot, and we want you to feel comfortable with us.”  Adam hugged me  tighter but remained quiet.

I worried about this quiet side of Adam as it usually meant he was troubled.  “Is everything okay, Adam?”  It took a minute of two and then he told us,

“I don’t think there’s a problem, but there’s a girl at school.  Her name’s June Westford.  She won’t leave me alone; she’s always following me around almost like a dog.  It’s making me nervous and I think some of the guys are laughing at me.”

Brad, pulled Adam toward him, and looking directly at him, he asked, “Is she cute?  Does she have big boobs?”

“Damn!” I said, “That’s a hell of a thing to ask the kid?  Does she?” I said with a giggle.

“You two are terrible.  She’s a tiny little thing and I think she’s flat chested, but she’s kinda cute.  I only spoke to her once.”

“Whatcha say?” asked Brad.

Adam rolled his eyes, rolled on to his back, and looking at the ceiling, told us, “I asked her why she was following me.”

“Yeah, and what did she say?” I asked.

“She didn’t answer me, but just ran away from me.  But there’s something else.”

I looked curiously at Brad and asked, “So what else is bothering you?”  Adam said nothing.  Brad leaned over him and told him, “Tell us or I will subject you to my horrible tickling torture.”

“Hurry up, Adam, it’s the most awful thing.  I know because he tickles me and won’t stop until I do what he wants.  So ‘fess up.”

“It’s a guy.”

“Whatcha mean? A guy, what?” asked Brad.

“Cripes, Brad, give him a moment.  You can tell us when you’re ready, Adam.  Brad can be an asshole,” I said hoping it would make him more comfortable.

Adam sat up on the bed and pulled his legs up Indian style, looked down at his hands which he was wringing.  He cleared his throat, and said,

“His name is Devon McKay.  He’s a year older than I am.  He’s a redhead and is a good athlete.”

Brad interrupted, “Yeah I know him a little, he’s on the football team, but he’s not on first string.  Everyone likes him even though he’s quiet and keeps pretty much to himself.”

“So?” I encouraged Adam.

“He’s in my German class and he’s smart as hell.  At first he made me feel like an idiot.  Anyway, one day, actually it was last Monday, he waited for me after class.  He asked me if I had ‘A’ Lunch and I told him I did.  He said how about we have lunch together so we can talk and get to know more about each other.  He said I looked a little lost and lonely.  I just stammered and fumbled  with my books, and I finally said yes.  He smiled at me and . . . and . . .”

“And what?” interrupted an impatient Brad.

“Brad, please wait,” I chided him.

“Go on, Adam,” I encouraged.  Adam kept looking at his hands obviously upset by what he had to tell us.  He looked at me for some kind of comfort and the best I could do was smile.

“When he smiled at me, well, I felt funny in my stomach.  I couldn’t understand it, but it was real.  So I met him in the cafe and we sat at a table in the far corner.  We ate quietly for a while, but he kept looking at me which made me uneasy.  We started talking and I told him about you Brad and you Jacob.  He knew you both, but he seemed to know Brad better than you, Jacob.  He told me they were both on the football team.  He said he didn’t know that you had a brother, Jacob.  I tried to explain a little to him without talking about the colony.”

I  looked at Brad, shaking my head slightly so that he wouldn’t speak and ruin the story.

“That was probably a wise thing,” I told Adam, “so what else did he want to know?”

“He asked me if I had a way home.  I told him I would be taking the bus or going home with Brad and you.  He said he would be happy to take me home.  Remember the day I told you I had some things to do after school and I’d take the late bus?”

“Yeah, so what about it?” asked an impatient Brad.

“Well, that was a little lie because I wanted Devon to take me home.  I wanted to talk to him some more.  I  . . . I . . . wanted to be with him longer.  He makes me happy.  Am I gay, Jacob?  Is that what’s wrong with me, Brad?” he asked with a sniffle.

Neither of us quite knew what to say, so I looked at Brad again and quickly said, “No that doesn’t mean you’re gay, Adam.  It means you’ve met someone you really like, but there wasn’t anything sexual about it.  It’s okay to have other guys as good friends.  All guys have good friends.”

“But even when he just shakes my hand, I get all these strange feelings and my . . . my cock jumps.  Isn’t that sexual?”

Brad couldn’t wait any longer, “Look, Adam, we can’t tell you if you like Devon in a way other than as a friend.  If he excites you when you are close or touch, that doesn’t make you’re gay nor does it make Devon gay.  It may just be a strong attraction to each other for many reasons.”

“Thanks both of you, but I know something that I think I should tell you.  Devon asked me to go to the movies with him on Saturday night.  I said yes, and I really want to go.  But I don’t know what I would do if he touches me in any sexual way in the theater.  I think I want him to do that and I want to touch him, too.  I want to kiss him, and for him to hold me.  But I don’t know why, and I am trying to fight it, but it isn’t working.”

“Wow!” Brad said as he took a deep breath.

“Why are you fighting it, Adam?” I asked.

Adam’s eyes were filled with tears, but he held his own and didn’t cry.  I put my arm around him and pulled him close to me.  He stuttered out,

“I don’t want to be gay.  I can’t let myself be gay, not after what I’ve seen, not after what I’ve suffered.  I just can’t be gay.  I can’t!”  Brad’s eyes were  glistening, and he chose not to speak for fear, I thought, that his voice would break.

“Adam, I’m trying to understand how you feel about Devon and why you don’t want to be gay because of what has happened.  Look, all I can tell you is that what you saw and suffered at the Colony isn’t what being gay is all about.  For many of us who are gay, sex is important, but love is what it’s all about.  Don’t be afraid to like Devon, to go to the movies with him, kiss him if that feels right or he may want to kiss you.  You’ll know, not that you’re gay, but that you want to be with him, not just once in a while, but always.  Then, Adam, it won’t matter to you if you’re gay or not.  Finally, Devon may not be gay either, so try to relax and enjoy being with him, as I’m sure he enjoys being with you.”

Adam threw himself the rest of the way into my arms, and in a moment of emotional release, sobbed.  Brad moved over and hugged both of  us.  We sat there hugging each other as the rays of the sun lengthened and the dark began to descend.  Our reverie was interrupted when Sadie called us to dinner.

*****

All Father Jim could remember about his announcement that Sunday in both services was the silence.  There was absolutely no noise.  In fact, for a while it sounded as if everyone had stopped breathing.  Gary, who was sitting in the front row, just smiled, but could obviously offer no assistance.  Scanning  the audience at the first service, he saw the friendly faces of Sadie, Diane and Doug Neilson, Beth Mason, Tim and Todd.

At the second service he saw Jacob and Brad, smiling as Gary had, but unable to offer any other support.  He was startled when the silence was broken by people leaving the church, not many for sure, but six or eight.  He said a silent prayer for them, and went on with the lesson.  Jim spoke of the need for understanding, of acceptance, of allowing all souls to be a part of the church and salvation.  If anyone has the right to judge otherwise, it is God Himself, and He needs no help from anyone.

His message fell on many open ears with acceptance, but within the parish there were others who did not accept any of what he said.  They believed, and firmly so, that it was the responsibility of every Christian person to protect the church from the likes of homosexuals and all other sinners.  For those, Father Jim was  an anathema.  This potent group was led by Arthur Coles Grantford, an elder of the parish council, and one of the wealthiest men in the community.

His immense fortune had given him great influence in the area.  That fortune was made in land and development.  Now his companies were run by his children: three sons and two daughters.  In his late seventies, his sensibilities were firmly in place and not easily modified.  There are those who would insist that he was a bigot who had expressed in a variety of ways his dislike of African Americans, Asians, and Latinos.  His outspokenness had also targeted gays, gay marriage, civil unions, and especially gay clergy.  So Father Crowley worried about Grantford’s reaction to Jim’s announcement.

One of Crantford’s powerful controlling actions was the manner in which he used his fortune.  In the case of St. Augustine’s Church, his generosity was celebrated.  This aspect of  Grantford’s philanthropy was well known by the parish.  Father Crowley also knew what that generosity meant to the church.  Not only did it mean the building itself was beautiful, but it supported many programs: the youth, the elderly, and the ill all had benefited.  Crowley prayed silently that Jim’s admission of homosexuality would not strip the parish of Grantford’s generosity.

After services Gary hurriedly whisked Jim away from the church, giving him a chance to relax from the intensity of the announcement.  Gary had recognized the difference in the way he was acknowledged before and after the service.  There had been almost an indifference to him prior to Jim’s announcement, and then afterwards, a benign awareness of his existence.  Gary had noticed that at the entrance to the church after  services, many in attendance avoided speaking with or shaking Jim’s hand.  He was troubled, wondering if his love for Jim was presenting both of them with an untenable position in the community.

Father Crowley was accosted by Arthur Grantford immediately after the first service.  He would not be put off, rather he insisted on speaking with Crowley immediately and in the parish house.  The old priest had quickly ushered Grantford into the parish house and then into his office.

“What,” demanded Arthur Grantford, “do you intend to do with this faggot priest?”  His face was red with anger and his hands trembled in hate.  Father Crowley was keenly aware of the temperament of the man and struggled to say the right thing in a way that would not further infuriate him.

“Arthur, you must try to control yourself.  You’re not a young man and getting too upset could harm you.  I suspected I might get this reaction from you because I know of your strict interpretation of scripture; however, these are times much removed from that and we live in a country where all human rights are observed and held sacred.  I allowed Father Jim to tell everyone about his sexual orientation himself, allowing him a time to say what was in his heart.  He chose not to explain, but simply to inform.”

“Why didn’t you send the sinner packing? screamed Grantford.  “We don’t need the likes of him endangering our young people, swaying members of St. Augustine’s away from the centuries-old tenets and beliefs of our church.  There can be no excuse, Father, for your inexplicable loss of sanity and morality.  You must explain yourself.”

As Grantford demanded Father Crowley’s immediate confession of an error in judgment and in the sacred responsibility of his office, his dislike for this threatening man and his archaic way of  thinking coalesced, and his decision to remain firm was strengthened.  He needed to confront this man, to be Jim’s defended and supporter.  Jim was a good man, and more importantly a good priest.  His proclivities in the bedroom were of no consequence to anyone except he himself, his partner, and his God.  Certainly Father Jim owed no explanation to Arthur Grantford, none at all.

Father Crowley stood and faced his nemesis.  Now the gentle Crowley was filled with disdain and anger; more importantly he did not owe a special explanation to Grantford.  At a suitable time and place he would explain his position to the congregation and the council, but  there could be no private explanations, especially to so onerous an adversary.

“Forgive me Arthur, but I do not owe you any private explanation of my actions.  If that is to occur then it will be to the full council and the congregation.  I’m sorry that you are so upset about this issue, and I acknowledge all that you have done for St. Augustine’s and  your valued contributions to all of us.  However, Arthur, you have no right to make demands on me or on how I administer this church!”

As Grantford rose from the chair, his being seemed to increase in size and he reached out his arms like wings; in his  black suit, he resembled an evil spirit wandering the mortal world, looking perhaps for forgiveness, or attempting to cause havoc. In his case, it was havoc that might have dire consequences for all who followed him and were members of the congregation.  His faced reddened, the veins in his neck throbbed, and his yellow teeth were clenched until he could finally shout,

“You will regret this, you stubborn priest!  You cannot refuse to share information with the council and the members of the church.  You can be removed for dereliction of duty, for abandoning the scriptures.  If you continue to support this priest, this plague on all of us, then I shall work diligently to see that both of you perverted priests are sent away from our church and into the mire of contemporary confusion about the the Bible.  There is no place in this church for one who is so wrong minded as you, Crowley.  None!”

Father Crowley suppressed much of what he wanted to say and simply told the dark avenger,

“And you, Mr. Grantford, are a bigot, a misconstruer of  biblical history  and a conveyer of interpretation that is incorrect and inflammatory. It may be you who has no place in this Church.”

Arthur Coles Grantford sank heavily back into the chair.  His head was bent, and his body shook with a still lingering anger; however, he was quiet.

*****

Travis Mason’s extradition hearing was held three days after he had been taken into custody.  It had been short and sweet as Georgia had little interest in Mason, but Florida and the feds were especially concerned about two things: kidnapping and criminal threatening with a gun.  Georgia’s primary interest was with members of the staff at the Colony and the need to quickly prosecute the guilty.

In handcuffs and with his legs manacled, Travis Mason was transported by the Florida Highway Patrol to Martin County and placed in the custody of the sheriff.  He was incarcerated in the prison in Stuart.  He would be housed there as he awaited his trial.  For the first two weeks, he was not allowed visitors with the exception of an attorney from his practice.  The young man, Terence Willowby, whose expertise was in business law, only made arrangements for Craydon Buckminster, the criminal lawyer Mason had hired to be a member of the firm, to take the case.   Buckminster now lived and practiced in a branch of the firm in Miami.

When Buckminster had read the police  reports and the preliminary information gathered by Willowby, he was uncomfortable with the possibility of getting any of the charges dropped.  When he told Mason of this, Travis seemed aware of the difficulty of his trial.  Buckminster cautioned him not to give up hope because there were many preliminary hearing to be attended to before the actual trial would begin.

When Buckminster asked about family, Travis Mason was unable to answer for a few minutes.  “I doubt,” related Mason, “that anyone in my family will be of help.  I don’t think that any of them will even visit me.  Certainly, none of them will testify for me.  You see, I kidnapped Brad, my youngest son, disowned my older son, Christopher, and shot and injured Jacob, my younger son’s boy friend.  I withheld information from my wife, and enrolled Brad in a terrible place where the young men were sexually abused by staff and older friends of the headmaster.

“I didn’t know this when I made the arrangements because I wanted them to try to bring my son back to a normal heterosexual life.  I know now that would never happen.  So it’s unlikely any of them will have anything to do with me.  I don’t expect them to help.  What I want most is to be forgiven by them.  Even that is doubtful.  I am resigned to accept my punishment, whatever that may be, and let them carry on with their lives.”

Craydon Buckminster turned in the uncomfortable chair that was in the small room provided for client-attorney interviews.  Buckminster was watching Mason as he spoke, noting how pained and distressed he  appeared.  He sensed in his client a certain acceptance of things to come, a trait Buckminster did not like in a person he was to represent.  That fatalistic view of the outcome of the trial would not hold Mason in good stead.  He did, however, understand it and he would be challenged to explain how it could be otherwise considering what the man had done to his family.  The operative word had to be ‘destroyed’.

Even Mason’s motivations wouldn’t be easy to sell to a rational and unbiased jury.  The only saving grace, if it could be called that, would be to bring up the sexual preferences of the man’s two sons.  But he doubted that  Mason would allow that.  He was where he was now because he was unable to accept his sons’ decisions to live a gay life.  The entire matter was perplexing, but he had faced greater obstacles and won.  Only time and a good jury could answer his concerns.

He assured Mason that he would work hard for him and that he would certainly be able to get him ‘off’.  It may take time and there will have to be revelations about him and his family if that was to happen. Mason sighed and looked down at the table.  He stood, shook Buckminister’s hand and informed him,  “You’ll have to find some other way, Craydon.  Stay away from my family because I have already  made life impossible for them.”  He walked to the door and rapped on it.  A guard was immediately there and took Mason back to his cell.

Buckminster picked up his papers, crammed them into his briefcase, left through the open door and out of the jail.  He walked to his car, got in, lit a cigarette, and inhaled deeply.  He whispered to himself, ‘What a goddamned fool!’  After starting the BMW, he pulled out of the prison parking lot, and sped down the highway toward I-95 and south to Miami.  He’d enjoy a good drink tonight, maybe two or three!

*****

A few days before the Li’s were to return to Ft. Myers, they took Peter and Chris on a car buying expedition.  After much investigation and comparison shopping, they unanimously decided that the automobile best fitted for the young couple was a bright red Toyota Camry.  The Li’s purchased the car for their son, Peter and his lover, Chris.  To Chris’s dismay, Mr. Li paid cash, actually by check, for the vehicle.  Peter’s parents also attended to the registration and insurance later that day, for all of which, of course, they paid. The two young men couldn’t believe what the Li’s were intent on doing for them. 

When they had tried to argue, John Li reminded them that they were both alive and healing.  Even though they had lost  their car, John and their mother, were saved the horror of losing one or both of them.  Lorraine Li was more definite: “When your father makes up his mind about something, it is futile to argue or complain.  My advice is to enjoy.” 

The dinner before the Li’s left would contain more surprises for Peter and Chris.  Sadie, Diane, Beth and Lorraine would spent the day preparing a wonderful meal which was to be enjoyed by many friends before the Li’s left for Ft. Myers. The meal would contain extraordinary Chinese dishes, Italian wonders, and American standards of steak and potatoes.  A variety of salads would accompany the meal as would a medley of vegetables.  When desserts came, it would be a smorgasbord of puddings, cakes, creams, ethnic sweets, and Italian Gelato.  Also available would be a number of coffees and teas.  For the younger crowd there were soft drinks, lemonade, and energy drinks.

The meal was to take  place under a large white tent, which Sadie insisted be dressed up with the best china and silver.  There would be beautiful floral arrangements and candles galore.  All the linens would be white as snow.  The rental company promised great things.  Diane had hired three waiters and waitresses, and two kitchen assistants.

Those invited were all friends and supporters of Jacob and Brad, each of whom was responsible in one way or another for helping with Brad’s rescue.  Father Jim and Gary would be there as would Tim and Todd.  Those two would arrive early to help in any way they could.  Kevin, Ashton, Greg, and Conner would come together accompanied by Viki Graham. There had been a small debate about inviting members of the police and officials from the high school.  Everyone eventually felt that it would be wrong to put pressure on these professionals, so it was agreed that none of them would be invited.  Essentially, it was a family party.  The Li’s with Peter and Chris would round out the group.

Jacob and Brad smiled when Adam asked if he could invite a new friend from school, a Devon McKay.  Sadie was happy that Adam had met someone who was a friend.  The Neilsons nodded in agreement, and so it was that Adam’s feeling of family was more secure than ever before in his  young life.

The party was to be held the next week on Wednesday evening.  Everything was planned and the group of family and friends waited impatiently for the good time they all knew was coming.

*****

Devon McKay sat at his desk quietly writing in his personal journal.  He had been keeping the journal for the past five years since the idea was introduced by his seventh grade teacher, Mrs. Watson.  At first he just wrote menial things, having little confidence to share his more personal and meaningful experiences, thoughts and concerns.

The more he wrote in the journal, the more intimate details of his life and his feelings began to appear in its pages.  He finally was able to let his emotions emerge about the terrible day of the accident.  He remembered the awful sound of screams and a sound which he couldn’t identify for a long time.  Eventually he knew: it was of crushing metal.  After the screams and the sound, he knew only darkness and silence.

When he did awake, he was in the hospital with one of his legs in a cast and hanging from a harness.  His left arm was also in a cast and had been restrained.  His entire body hurt, and even though he called for his mother and father, he could only see his Granny and Grampa.  He went from being aware and awake back to the blackness.  Finally he woke up and stayed awake.  The first thing he asked was “Where are Mom and Dad?”  He didn’t get a real answer, but when he saw the tears in Granny’s eyes and Grampa looked away from him, he began to understand and it was then that he wept.

Later he visited the graves of his mother and father.  The first time he really didn’t respond, but neither his grandmother or his grandfather pressured him.  The second time his heart was heavy as he watched his Granny run her fingers across the top of the gravestone.  Her daughter, his mother, lay there with his father, both victims of a drunk driver.  That day he made a promise to himself: he would never drink!  To this day he never had.

As he remembered all this, he was staring out the window and unconsciously doodling in the margins of the journal.  His focus had been on the flowers growing outside the sliders on the balcony.  Suddenly he became aware of his doodling, and his face broke into an enormous smile when he glanced down and saw one word, written over and over: it was ‘Adam’.

It was funny, really, but he had liked Adam the first time he saw him in German class.  He tried to figure out why he had been drawn to him, and he guessed it was because there was something lonely and withdrawn about him.  Maybe because he had known those same feelings, he had a kinship with Adam.  It took a week or so before he made any attempt to speak to him.  Finally, he stopped him after class and asked him to join him for lunch.  He could tell Adam was hesitant, but finally he said  yes.

That was the beginning of something new and a little frightening to Devon.  He began to think about Adam at all sorts of strange times like bedtime, showering, even, and he was decidedly unnerved by it, when he masturbated.  All he could think about when he was reaching his climax was Adam’s smile, Adam’s eyes, the way Adam’s hair sometimes fell a little low on the left side of this forehead almost obscuring his eye, how Adam would sit with his hands folded, his fingers entwined, and how he saw Adam’s ass flexing and moving as he walked away.  And at this highly charged emotional moment, he wanted to touch Adam, to hold him in his arms, to kiss him, to feel him against his body and that would be when he would ejaculate.  Then as he wiped up his semen with the handkerchief he kept hidden in his closet, he would feel ashamed, not for masturbating, but for making Adam the source of his ecstasy.

His doodling had continued during his memory trip, and he was aware that his penis had hardened which made him smile.  He looked at what he had doodled and he read: ‘sexy’, ‘cute’, ‘hot’, ‘ass’, ‘endowed?”.  Devon laughed aloud, slammed the journal shut and picked up his phone.  He dialed Adam’s cell phone.  It rang twice and then he heard the voice that gave him goose bumps,

“Hey! This is Adam.”

“Devon, here.  I wanted to be sure everything was set for tomorrow night.”

“Yeah, what time?”

“How about if I pick you up at six  thirty.  That way we can get to the seven o’clock showing.  How’s that?”

“Sounds fine to me.  Devon, what are you wearing?”

“Clothes.”

“Come on, wise ass, you know what I mean.”

“Sorry, shorts and a T and sandals.  No socks!”

Adam grinned to himself and thought he’d have a little fun,  “I think I’ll wear a pink jock, no shirt, barefoot, and a large brimmed red hat.  How’s that sound?”  Devon did not answer immediately, but then said,

“I like one part of the outfit, well maybe two, or probably three.”

“Yeah, so explain, mein Freund.”

Laughing principally to hide his growing sexual stimulation and Adam’s terrible pronunciation, Devon choked out, “I like the jock, but maybe not pink.  The barefoot are okay, and your naked torso is fine, but the red hat has to go.”

“Adam?”

“Yeah.”

“Never mine.”

“Come on,  Devon.  What do you want to know?”

“Hast du mich gern? Ich meine, bist du gern mit mir zusammen?”  (“Do you like me?  Do you like to be with me?”) 

“Ja!”

“Wärst du böse auf mich, wenn ich dich berühren würde?”
  (“If I touch you, will you be angry?”)

“Was meinst du?” (“What do you mean?”)

Devon sighed and smiled thinking how bewildered Adam must be and told him,

“Don’t worry  about it, Adam.  It wasn’t that important.  It was just something I couldn’t bring myself to ask English.”

“Damn it, Devon, don’t do this to me.  Does it have to do with my liking you?  Do you think I like you too much?  Am I a pest?”

“God, no!  It’s not like that at all.  Don’t laugh, or more importantly don’t hate me, Adam.  What you didn’t understand was a question I’ve wanted to ask you since the day we met and talked at lunch.  What I asked was if I touched you would you be angry?  It was stupid so just forget it, okay?”

“No, it’s not okay to forget it.  No, no, no!  I wouldn’t be angry if you touched me.  Hasn’t it been obvious to you that I have wanted you to touch me?  My, God, Devon I practically asked you to.  I’m sorry, Devon.  I’m way out of line.  Maybe the movies tomorrow night isn’t such a good idea.  I mean . . .”

“Shut up!” Devon  interrupted,  “I’ll not hear of us not going to the movies.  We’ll sort this all out before or after the show.  And, Adam?”

“What?”

“I plan to touch you tomorrow night.”  There was a click and the circuit was dead.

Devon looked at the photograph of his mother and father.  His father was holding him and all three of them were smiling.  It looked like Disney in the background.  Everyone was happy.  Devon felt a return of that happiness which he hadn’t experienced for a long time.  It seemed to overtake his entire being. Devon’s eyes glistened as he bowed his head silently praying that he didn’t screw up his relationship with Adam.

Across town, Adam put his cell phone on his desk, leaned back in the chair, and smiled.  ‘Fuck,’ thought Adam, ‘Devon likes me!  Fuck!  Did I screw it up somehow?  I mean, I wanted to tell him I not only wanted him to touch me, but I wanted him to kiss me or that I wanted to touch him and I really wanted to kiss him.  My God, I think I’m gay.  Wow!’

There were no tears, just smiles!

*****

I was getting dressed for school when Brad came up behind me and kissed my neck.  That was bad enough, but then he licked my ear and suddenly his tongue was in my ear and I was going crazy.

“Stop, you sex fiend,” I said with a laugh.  Brad just pulled me around to face him and soon we were sucking face.  His good hand was on my ass cheeks causing my cock to come to attention.  I could feel his hardness against me.

He broke our kiss and said in a gasping voice told me,

“You’re so hot, Jake.  I want you, now.  Please.”

“You horny stud, we can’t have sex  now.  I mean, I have to get to school, I’m almost dressed, I need to have breakfast, you could hurt your shoulder, your leg has just gotten better, Sadie might come to the door, and… oh shit, oh baby.  I want you so much.”

I locked the door to the suite, and led my lover to our bed.  He was naked except for his boxers which came off immediately.  My clothes left a trail from the door to the bed.  Brad was sitting on the edge of the bed and quickly leaned back pushing his butt slightly over the edge of the mattress.  I had already slipped on a condom and had squeezed some lube into my hand.  I was quick to rub  Brad’s rosebud, and shortly had him purring as I worked my fingers into him, opening him for my cock.  I moved close to him, raising his legs and placing them on my shoulders.

I began rubbing my cock head against his pucker, and his moaning became more intense.  I pushed and my cock popped into him.  I waited for him to adjust to my rod and as I was about to push all the way into him, Sadie’s clear voice cut through our sexual bliss.

“Are you two up and ready.  Jacob, you have to get off to school.  No dilly-dallying, understand?

I called out, “Almost ready, Sadie.  We’ll be down in five minutes or less.”  Brad was stifling a laugh which irritated me.

“What’s so damned funny?” I demanded.

Between guffaws, Brad was able to tell me, “Sadie said  you had to get off, but you can’t and neither can I.  Funny as hell, I think.  Just shove it all into me and take a couple turns of rubbing my love button.”  I did just that, and then we separated,  cleaned up and dressed.  We arrived at breakfast on time.

*****

I was pissed that I had an important math test to take today.  Because of that I would not be able to accompany Brad to the doctor’s office.  This was especially upsetting because the nurse had called to have Brad come in for an unscheduled checkup.  My father pacified me by assuring me that he would take Brad to the appointment and if there was any problem, he would come to the school and get me.

That calmed me, but not as much as the tongue-filled kiss Brad gave me.  It reminded me of one of our earliest kisses in the same garage.  I got in his  Mustang and drove out of the drive on my way to Palm High.

Brad watched as Jacob drove away in his Mustang before returning to the table where he enjoyed an additional cup of coffee. He chatted with Diane and Sadie while Doug was taking a shower and getting ready to take him to the doctor’s appointment.  That was a joke, but the only one who didn’t know about it was Jake.  It  had been very difficult to keep Jake out of the loop.  Brad didn’t have an appointment, but he did need to go shopping so that he could get a gift for Jacob.

Sadie came up with the idea of having the party for the Li’s, but it was Diane who thought it could also be an early birthday party for Jacob.  They wisely didn’t tell Brad for a while, knowing that he might spill the beans and tell Jacob, probably in a moment of sexual passion. And they were right!  He knew that everyone attending the birthday party would have a present, so he wanted to be sure he had something significant to present to Jake.

Brad decided, after talking to his Mom, Diane  and Sadie, that he would give Jacob something very special at the party.  None of them made any effort to tell him what to give Jake.  Actually, he had been thinking about it since Jacob’s heroic behavior with his father and then at the colony. He finally decided what he wanted to do, but he chose not to discuss it with anyone.  His mother was supportive, but did not inquire.  She provided him with a bank card and assured him that there was adequate money to take care of most things.  He joked about not buying a Mercedes, but wasn’t certain she thought that was funny.  She might have if it could have been his father’s money.

Doug would take him shopping today and he would attempt to take care of everything.  The Li’s had all ready make it clear what they were getting for Jacob, and didn’t want anyone to duplicate it.  In a way, he wanted to give Jacob his gift privately, so he decided to get two things, one that he could give Jake at the party, and the other he would give him when we were alone and maybe not until his real birthday.  He wasn’t sure how to do it, and maybe he would have to ask Chris or his Mom.

Sadie was smiling at him as these thoughts ran through his mind.  He saw her poke Diane gently, then she spoke to him.

“Are you having trouble deciding what to get for Jacob?  Can Diane or me be of any help to you?  Have you discussed it with you mother?  Have Chris or Peter suggested anything?”

”A little. No.  No.  No.” He answered with a silly giggle.

Diane and Sadie were laughing as his Mom came into the room.  She looked askance at the two women and then focused on him.  He had stopped giggling, but he was still smiling like his childhood Cheshire cat.

“Brad, what’s going on and why is it funny?” she asked.

Sadie saved him from any further interrogation when she told his mom, “We just asked him about his gift for Jacob and he related his answered in a short, but clear answer.”

“Yes,” added Diane, “we actually deserved the answer we got, but I think he may need some help deciding what to do?”

Brad was squirming in his seat now because he knew his mother would take him up on a lack of respect for my elders.  He was right as she immediately asked him,

“Brad, were you rude to Sadie and Diane?”

“Oh, Beth, we’re sorry if we gave you that idea.  He was fine about letting us know where he stood in relation to his gift buying excursion with Doug,” offered Diane.

His mother came and sat in the chair next to his.  Sadie quickly brought her a cup of coffee.  His mom stroked his good arm and smiling at him inquired,  “What have you decided to get for Jacob?”

Brad took a deep breath and told the three women, “I know what I want to give him privately, but I’m having some difficulty deciding what to give him at the party.  I want it to be nice, but I don’t want it to be anything that is close to what I have decided I want to give him privately.  I hope you can understand that.  I suspect Jacob will come running to show you the other gift anyway.”

The general laughter from the women supported his contention that Jacob wouldn’t be able to keep it private for long.  He loved all of them and would want to share it with them.  As Brad thought about that, he wondered if he had made the wrong decision to present his special gift privately.  But he quickly concluded that was the way it had to be.  It would be between Jacob and him.  If Jake decided to share, then that would be okay with him.

“Can you tell us any of the things that you think he might enjoy as a gift?” his mother asked.

“He likes clothes, but he’s pretty well stocked up on that.  He’s crazy about electronics, but Mr. Li has already told me that they are  giving him a new laptop, so that’s out of the question.  If he had a car I might find something that he would enjoy, maybe a  Garmin GPS device.  He might like a new cell phone, one that has more options.  He could use a new monitor for his desk computer, and he loves music, so a new larger ipod would make him smile, I think.  Then I might arrange a trip somewhere for a weekend where we could be by ourselves and enjoy having time to just relax and enjoy each other.”

The room was quiet as he finished his list.  He noticed the three women of his life glancing at each other.  It was Sadie that spoke first,  “Well, Brad, it sounds to me as if you have a really good list, one to which I can’t really add.” Diane and his mother were shaking their heads in agreement.  Diane looked at him, and with an enormous grin, said,

“Brad, Jacob’s dad and I didn’t intend to tell you about this, but I think it might help you a little  in choosing a gift for Jake.  When Doug gets here, I’ll let him tell you . . .”

“Tell him what, Diane?” interrupted Doug.

“I just want Brad to know about our birthday gift to Jacob.  I thought it might help him select a gift.  He’s having a little trouble deciding”

Doug grumbled, “Can you keep a secret from Jacob, at least until the party gets here and we give him our gift?”

“I think I can.  At least I’ll try my best, but Doug, Jake has a way of getting things from me, especially if he thinks I know something that he doesn’t.  He didn’t pester me about the party because he thinks it’s for the Li’s.  Maybe you shouldn’t tell me.  I can’t guarantee anything because I know that if he gets me in the mood, I’ll do and tell anything he wants.”

Doug burst out laughing and was immediately joined by the women in the room.  At first Brad was a little upset, and then the more they laughed and the more he thought of Jacob getting him to tell him anything, he began to laugh, too.

“Well, it’s true, all of you.  Jacob can be a real devil when he turns the charm on, and me, well, I’m so weak to his charms.”

Between giggles, Brad’s mom  said, “We would never have guessed that if you hadn’t told us.  Bradley Mason, I expect you to fight those charms and keep your mouth closed about this surprise for Jacob.  Understand?”

“Yes, Mom, I understand.”

“Don’t be too hard on the boy.  It’s not easy to keep a secret from someone you love.  We shouldn’t forget that,” supported  Diane.

“Amen!” agreed Sadie.

“Enough, enough.  I’ll tell him; in fact I’ll show him while we’re out shopping.  Now, how about a couple of eggs or something?  I’m a hungry man,” Doug said.

With that, breakfast began again with Sadie and Diane  getting eggs and ham for everyone except Brad as he had already had breakfast.  While everyone was enjoying their breakfast, the  Li’s and Peter and Chris came into the dining room.  Lorraine Li wouldn’t let anyone prepare breakfast for her ‘men’ as she called them.  Brad got a message to Chris when he kissed him on the cheek,  “Chris, I need to talk to you and  Peter before Doug and I leave to go shopping.”  Chris shook his head in agreement, and breakfast continued.

*****

Chris and Peter decided to take their breakfast out by the pool and Brad joined them.  All the adults decided to stay in and continue their conversations.

“So, my cute brother, what’s up?” asked Chris.

“I want to get something for Jake that shows how much I love him and which he can have with him all the time.   I have a couple of ideas, but I need you two to help me decide what would be the best.  Here are my ideas: a ring, a bracelet, a necklace and that’s it.”

Chris had one arm around Peter and was eating with the other.  Peter was smiling as Brad spoke.  Peter and Chris kissed each other and then both of them pulled a money clip from their pockets.  I had never been aware of them.  They were beautiful and Chris handed me his.  I turned it in my hands and read the engraved inscription on the back,  “My life is complete with you in it; without you I am an empty vessel.  Love me always.  Peter.”

“That’s fuckin’ beautiful!” Brad gushed.

“Thanks a fuckin’ lot,” said Peter as the partners laughed.

I was humbled by their laugh, realizing that I had used some rather rank language.  “Forgive me, I just thought it was so wonderful.  I mean, God, you two are so great.  Wow!”

“Forgiven,” laughed Chris, “and thanks for your kind words.  I guess, if it was me, I might suggest a bracelet, but that can be a pain in the ass.”

“I like the ring, myself,” said Peter, “but that can be a pain, too, getting caught on things, plus it could look a little like you’re married to someone  other than your partner when you’re out by yourself.”

“That leaves a necklace, but how can I have anything engraved on that?  I mean it’s too narrow.  Cripes! I don’t know what to do.”

“You could have some kind of medallion on it, Brad.  That would give you a place to have something engraved.  You could keep it simple, or it could be very complex,” suggested Chris.

“Shit, honey, you always have great ideas,” said Peter.

“Yeah, and I have a really good one right now, but we can’t do it in front of Brad.  He’s too innocent,” suggested Chris.

“Holy crap.  Do you two ever have anything on your minds except fucking?”Brad demanded.

“Nope, not unless we’re asleep,” giggled Peter.

Brad turned and walked back toward the house, then stopped  to say, “Hey, thanks for your help and I really mean that.  Now you can get back to fuckin’ each other’s brains out.”

“Brad,” Chris yelled, “thanks for giving us your permission to make love.  We wouldn’t have done it without your okay.  Get your ass out of here, brother.  Hey, I love you.”

*****

Friday night came, and everyone had a place they wanted to go.  Brad and Jacob went out for pizza while the Li’s, Neilsons, Beth Mason, and Chris and Peter went out for Mexican food.  Adam feigned not feeling well so he and Sadie stayed at home.  Sadie made some hearty chicken soup which helped quiet Adam’s stomach, as he was already fretting about his date with Devon.

He watched TV on the big screen in the family room until about nine o’clock and then told Sadie he was heading to bed.  She asked if he was all right, and he assured her that a good night’s sleep was all he needed.

He had moved into his own room about a week ago.  He had a difficult time adjusting to having so much.  Diane had taken him shopping and he now had all the clothes he wanted.  They also gave him a desk top computer, so he had access to IM and the internet.  He had only used IM once before when he and Devon had a short exchange about a German lesson.  He had thought about trying to contact Devon again, but he chickened out.

He undressed, and after a quick shower got into a pair of  boxers. While he was brushing his teeth, he really looked at himself in the mirror.  What he saw made him feel a little better about himself.  He had put on quite a few pounds because of Sadie’s great food.  His face had healed quickly so there were no bruises or other marks to tell a tale about his past.  His body still had something to say, but for the most part the worst was covered by his shorts, even in gym class.

Back in the bedroom, he turned on the computer, switched off the lights, and sat in the darkness looking forlornly at the screen.  He placed his fingers on the keyboard and brought up Explorer.  He went to his e-mail account and typed in Devon’s address.  In the subject line he wrote: ‘Hi’.  Then he sat back in his chair, and again stared at the  screen.  ‘What did he want to say?’  How should he say it?  How would Devon react?’ he thought.

He moved forward again, placed his fingers on the keys and began to type:

“Hey Devon,

I’m home with Sadie.  Everyone went out to dinner.  I didn’t want to go. Sadie gave me some great chicken soup and homemade bread.  She also served some great apple pie.  I watched a little TV, but I really wasn’t interested.  So I went to my room.     

I’ve showered and am ready for bed.  I thought I might send you a quick message before I get in bed.  I’m nervous about tomorrow night, or perhaps I’m just excited about being alone with you away from school.  I guess you know I think you are a great guy.  You became my friend when I really needed someone at school other than Brad and Jacob and their friends.  I like all those guys, but I don’t want to spend time with  them, at least not like I want to spend time with you.

I don’t want this to get sticky and I’m afraid if I go on much longer I’ll spill my guts, so goodnight.

Adam” 

He leaned back away from the computer, got out of his chair and walked to the bed and then back to his desk.  He read what he had written, but he did not sit.  He began to wring his hands, a habit he knew he had to change.  He moved away from the desk again, returned, sat down, and quickly clicked ‘send’.

He ran to the bed and dove on to it.  He turned on to his back and stared at the ceiling.  There were a few moving shadows from the computer screen dancing on the ceiling which made him feel as if he was slipping away.  He nearly jumped out of the bed, when the computer announced, “You have mail.”  He sat up, astonished by what he had  just heard.

When he got to the desk and his computer, the e-mail was still open.  He checked his inbox and found ‘dvmy@cap.com’ with the subject: ‘Re: Hi”.  Adam sat at the desk, and even though he was shaking a little, he opened the message.  It read:

“Adam,

Thanks for sending me a message.  I was thrilled.  I didn’t go out tonight, but then I usually don’t.  Often Friday night is an early to bed night for me so that I am rested for the Saturday game.  I don’t play much, but I stick with it because I am not a quitter.

About tomorrow night, you might be surprised to learn that I ‘m  nervous, too.  I hope that I won’t be shaking like that proverbial dog shitting on a briar. LOL  Let’s try not to be nervous, excited I can buy into.

Adam, I want you to know that I think you are a very special person, someone who is probably too good for me,  but I will try to earn your friendship.  I so want you to like me, to enjoy being with me.  I have few friends at school although most are football players who are fleeting friends.  Brad has always been pleasant, but not really a close friend.

In fact, Adam, I hope that we can be very close friends.  I’ve told my grandmother and grandfather about you and they want to meet you sometime soon.  I would like, if you think it’s a good idea, to meet your parents, too.

Adam, if our relationship gets serious, I know my grandparents will support it.  I wonder if your parents will support us, too.  I hope I’m not rushing stuff.  It’s my nature, Adam, to want things to move along.

I bet I won’t sleep well tonight because I will be thinking about you and tomorrow night.  Forgive me if what I am about to say upsets you, but I know deep in my heart that I would sleep better  if you were here with me.

Good night, sweet prince, and flights of angels bring you gentle sleep.  That’s a corruption of a quote from “Hamlet”.  But it says what’s in my heart.

I bet you think I let this get sticky.  Sorry.

Devon” 

Adam just stared at the text of the message, trying not to scream for joy.  God, how he wanted to be with Devon, how he wanted it to be in a special relationship, how he wanted to feel Devon’s arms around him, Devon’s lips on his, and there were other things he desired, but those would not be fulfilled at the moment.  He clicked reply and quickly typed:

“Sweet Devon,

 It’s not sticky.  I think you’re the most wonderful, handsome and sexy person I have ever met.  I wish I were there with you so that we could sleep together, but that will have to wait.  Tomorrow night now seems a hundred years away and I won’t sleep much tonight because only you will occupy my mind.  Devon, I am falling hard for you.

Goodnight.

Your silly Adam.”

Across town, Devon quickly opened the message from Adam.  He read it quickly and as he did his grin  grew ever wider and soon filled his face.  As he finished, he jumped to his feet, thrust his arm straight up into the air and yelled, “YES!”

To be continued... 

*****

“The measure of love is to love without measure"

Feedback always welcome:     

Special thanks to all of my faithful readers for staying with me into BOOK TWO.  I hope you will continue to enjoy the story as it unfolds in the new book.  I will try to keep up with the writing, but life often interferes with the output, so I ask your indulgence and patience.  Thanks to Peter who has agreed to continue editing BOOK TWO.  His intelligent and sensitive editing along with his insightful suggestions add much to the story.  I also want to thank Alex for agreeing to translate from English to German, thereby assuring the best translation possible.

Posted: 09/26/08