What Disability
by: Peter

(© 2011 by the Author)
 

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

Chapter 8 

I was there early to help Conner get showered--no sex--and get dressed. I changed into a dress shirt and tie.

"You didn't tell me it's formal," Conner joked.

"I thought this would be appropriate, if I looked more professional," I said.

"What should I wear?"

"I want you to wear a white T-shirt and your workout shorts.  I want them to see what great shape you're in."

We met in Dr. Brown's office.  Dr. Boering sat at the end of his desk and the three of us on the other side of it.  I didn't realize I was to speak till Joe nudged me and told me they wanted to hear my report.  I wasn't prepared for that; I hadn't even written up a report.  I thought Joe would do the talking.

I stammered through my embarrassment to tell them I didn’t have a formal report prepared yet.

"Just give us your assessment," Dr. Brown said.

"Well….."  I glanced at Conner.  "There's not that much to say, really; I think Conner's progress has been nothing short of phenomenal. He's come out of his shell, he's gained his confidence back. We've been to the beach, he met a girl there, we even went in swimming."  Both doctors' eyebrows raised at that.  "And you can see what great shape he's in.  But he wants to get on the treadmill.  In my opinion he's definitely ready for his leg, and I don't really understand why I have to make that case for him.  I'm not his doctor, I'm not even a licensed therapist, I'm just helping out as a volunteer.  But it's like we're on opposite sides, we think he's ready but we have to convince you.  I'm not a military person either, but I know he wants more than anything else to get back to his unit, and I don't see any good reason why he shouldn't be allowed to do that. And that's all I have to say."

I didn't realize how nervous I was till I finished, and I could feel myself shaking inside.

Dr. Brown let a little smile creep through his scowl.  "Well, Dr. Boering, I think we have been duly  reprimanded," he said.

"I'm a civilian myself," Dr. Boering said.  "The decision to send Conner back to his unit will be up to the military brass.  But your report is duly noted, and…….."   He leaned over to reach under his desk and brought out a prosthesis--Conner's leg.  "I am inclined to agree with you." 

Conner let out a gush of surprise and his smile of relief masked his face.

"We will get you fitted with this thing right away, and I already have you on the schedule for therapy sessions.  I don't see any reason why we can't get you on the treadmill today."

"Wow. That soon," Conner said.

"Unless you have a reason you would like to put it off."

"Oh, no sir. I'm ready," Conner said.  Then he asked, "Hey, can I do squats with this thing?"

"It will handle anything your other leg will handle."

Conner was exploring the contraption with his fingers, almost lovingly.

"Any more questions?" the doctor asked.

"If I could say something….I would like to have Todd continue as my therapist."

"I'm not a licensed therapist, Conner.  I'm only a volunteer."

But Conner ignored me.  "All due respect, sir, Todd has brought me this far as a volunteer, I don't see what'd be so difficult about having him help me learn to walk again."

I could tell Dr. Boering was thinking about it, the way he was nodding at what Conner was saying.

"I think that could probably be arranged, the therapist would be right there on the floor," he said. He looked at me then.  "And you, young man, I would like to invite you to apply for a scholarship that the hospital provides to promising young volunteers.  That is, if you have any interest in this line of work. Your time here volunteering would be credited toward your internship."

I was stunned. I had no intentions of going into the medical field, I was only volunteering to get extra credits for community service.  But the picture had suddenly changed.

"I think I would like that, thank you."

I asked Conner later why he requested that I stay on with him.

He grinned and replied,  "I might still need help in the shower."

Nobody could believe the progress Conner made. I was standing on one side of the rail on the treadmill and the therapist was on the other side instructing him on how to balance himself and set a pace.  Once she gripped his arm as if steady he told her, "I'm okay, I can handle this."

At the same time she was instructing me on the controls and how to watch out for him. Once he got used to his new leg, which took all of about ten minutes, Conner was out of the starting gate like a thoroughbred. He had been paying attention, and he jacked up the speed and started trying to run, and the therapist literally reared back with surprise. There was one more session with the therapist and he was left to me. 

Along with the treadmill, Conner also started doing squats. He was a bit awkward at first, keeping his balance but I was right behind him to assist, something that I didn't mind at all.  But he caught on quickly and was soon pushing up weight that I couldn't handle with both of my legs.  And he threw in his regular workouts to make his upper body even stronger. Conner was a Marine on a mission, a man obsessed. It paid off.  Too soon.

He had not told me that his request to be sent back to his unit was under consideration, till it was approved. It shouldn't have surprised me, that was the goal he was working for, but it caught me off guard. More than that, I was devastated. I had become accustomed to being around the big stud, gotten used to his powerful sex urge. And now it was all coming to an end.

He was so happy he was about to burst telling me, till he must have seen the disappointment on my face.

His face fell. "You're not happy about this," he said.

"Of course I'm happy. It's what we've been working for," I said, trying to put on a happy face. It didn't work, of course, there was no way I could hide my disappointment. 

"No, you're not.  I'm sorry. It was thoughtless of me. I am such a dickhead."

I laughed.  "You're a Marine.  How could you not be happy.  There's no need to curb your enthusiasm because of me."

"I am going to miss you," he said.

"Not nearly as much as I'm going to miss you."

"I've thought about this, me leaving, and I,….well, I tried to think of some way to show my appreciation for all you've done for me.  A going away present."

"You don't owe me anything, Conner. Geezuss, don't you know, you've shown your appreciation right along."

"That could hardly be considered showing my appreciation when I was getting more out of it than you."

"Don't bet on that," I said pointedly.

"It had to be something more.  Something…..heroic.  I came up with something."

"Something heroic?" I asked jokingly.

"Well, it's sure as hell heroic to me, I hope it is for you.  You know that hotel we went to, where the pool was up on the seventh or eighth floor, where we had a poolside room?"

"Yes."

"I want us to go there."

"That sounds great," I said.  I didn't say it but we had been there, and nice as it was, I didn't consider it anything approaching heroic. Unless he had something else in mind, a surprise.

Maybe he had Marine buddies he was inviting along; I had mentioned how awesome it would be to spend a night in the barracks and have a Marine gang bang.  Maybe that  hotel was going to be the barracks for the night.

There was the usual red tape but Conner finally got his orders.  He was  going back to his unit, which he had left in Iraq and was now in Afghanistan.  He had been medically released but he was still staying at the hospital annex pending his deployment. The day approached and he was to leave the next evening.  The night before, we went to the hotel. I was surprised when Conner asked me for my keys. I hesitated but quickly realized that I had no reason not to let him drive. 

He laughed and said,  "They're going to let me drive a Humvee over there."

So he drove us to the hotel. We checked in then had dinner at the poolside dining room at the pool on the ground floor. He ordered without giving me a chance.

"This is your night, but I'm in charge," he said. "So you do whatever I tell you."

"Well, yes, sir," I said, and a little shiver went down my spine as I wondered just what all he had in mind to tell me. 

It was a leisurely dinner and afterwards we lingered over a couple of brandies. 

"This will settle our dinner, then we’re going swimming," he said, holding his glass up in a toast.

The brandy warmed us, and for some reason, for the first time, Conner started talking about his family. He was the third generation in his family to go into the military.  His older brother had opted for college, he told me with a bit of a sneer.

"I wondered about your family, but since you never mentioned them, I didn’t think I should."

"I appreciate that, because you probably wouldn't have gotten a conversation out of me," he said.

"Why now?" I asked.

He shrugged.  "The brandy, maybe."

"Why not before with a beer buzz?" I asked.

"I don’t know, really.  Maybe what I'll be facing. It can make you think of family." 

"There was never any mail, was there, or phone calls….no one ever came to visit.  I was always curious about that."

"That's an easy answer.  I'm not the favorite son."

"Oh?"

"No, Roger was the favorite. He was a puny little shit, but smart as hell.  I was more the big dumb jock, although I got good grades, too.  But the jock part, I think they all resented that I had that over him, especially as his younger brother. Then when I joined the Marines, that was the last straw."

"I can see your brother resenting you, maybe your mom, because mom's tend to be protective of the weaker one.  But your Dad….you said you're third generation."

"Oh, he's proud of me. He's told me privately.  But he can't show it openly because that would take something away from my brother and his accomplishments."

"But, geezuss, Conner, you lost your leg."

"I told them not to come visit, I didn't want them to see me like this.  I figured that would relieve them of any guilt."

"It's pretty fuckin' sad if you ask me."

"I got over it a long time ago.  The Marine Corps is my family. I'll see them when I get back from this tour.  I need to show them that being without a leg doesn't stop me."

"The other thing I've been curious about.  No girlfriend back home?" 

"There was.  I broke it off when I lost my leg.  I figured I would save her the trouble."

"Was that fair? She might have loved you anyway." 

"I couldn't be sure of that, and I didn't want to deal with the rejection. And there was the other…..you know…..I was afraid I would be impotent."

"Well, you're not!"

"I may get back in touch with her when I get back, show her I'm still the man I was."  He laughed.  "Speaking of I'm not, are you ready to go upstairs?"

"If you are."

In the elevator I still wondered what he had in store for me. There was no doubt that I would get royally fucked one last time, but I didn't know whether to expect roses, fine chocolates or a squad of horny marines. When he let us in the room there was none of that, leaving me still baffled.

The room was spacious, well furnished with a king size bed, situated oddly near the window looking out on the pool.  Then I saw it; the champagne chilling in a bucket of ice. The drapes were partially opened and Conner opened them all the way.

"Are we going to put on a demonstration?" I asked.

"I will if you will."

I wasn't so sure he wasn't serious.  If he was, well, I would go along with it if there weren't kids out there.  I really didn't care if people watched us.

Conner started undressing so I did the same. I wanted to undress him but like he said, it was about me but he was making the rules. When he was down to his briefs--the drapes were still open--he went over to the table near the window to open the champagne. There were a half dozen people in and around the pool.  He poured two glasses and walked over to hand one to me; I was down to my briefs as well now. He stood at the window so I stood beside him, in full view of the people at the pool, if they wanted to look up."You know, I've been going to mention how much you've benefited from my therapy."

"How so," I asked with a frown.

"You don't see it?  I can see you've put on some muscle."

I smiled, a little embarrassed.  "Matter of fact, I thought so, too, but I was afraid to believe it.  I have been working out on the side."

"Believe it," he said.  "It looks good."

"I would like to look that good," I said, nodding to his near naked body.

He just smiled and began pulling the drapes closed.  He downed his champagne and gently took my glass without giving me a chance to empty it. "We're wasting valuable time," he said as he set the empty glasses on the table then stretched out on the bed.

I was surprised how casually he removed the prosthesis and laid it on the floor beside the bed. "You've certainly lost your inhibitions," I said, smiling as I crawled on the bed with him.

"I want to lose more," he said as he put his arm out to pull me in tight, half on top of him.

I was nearly overwhelmed with his strength and the feel of his muscles.  He initiated the kiss which made it even more passionate.  I felt his cock coming to life within his shorts. When we broke, I kissed his chest and began the trek down his rock-solid abs, his hand remaining on my shoulder.  When I reached his shorts I mouthed the growing bulge there, quickly soaking the white cotton material with my drool.  I was so excited and anxious for this, and sad that it would be our last time together, maybe forever.  I moved down between his legs and tugged at his shorts. He lifted his butt to let me pull them off.  I nuzzled my face in his crotch and licked his balls, drinking in the clean, male aroma.  I thrilled at his soft moan and his hands on my shoulders, as if to guide me. They weren't necessary; I knew the way.

I lifted my head and looked up at him.  "Sometimes I wish I had not done such a good job. It only served to lose you." I felt his grip on my shoulders, tugging to pull me up to him.  I allowed myself to be guided, half lifted up over him.

"We'll do everything you want to do this night, but right now…..I want you to fuck me."

I was so shocked I did a double take that actually caused my muscles to tighten.  I looked down into his eyes and saw them dancing, and a tight smile that was being prevented from breaking his full lips.

"You….you're….serious," I managed.

"Dead serious," he said in a strong voice.

"No."

He scowled at me.  "You're turning me down?"

"Yes. I'm not going to let you do something like that out of obligation."

"Weren't you listening? I said I want you to fuck me. What part of I want don't you understand?"

"You've already said you owe me big time. You don't owe me that."

"Oh, but you do," he said dryly.

"What do you mean??"

"All the pleasure I've given you, fucking your tight ass, you don't think you owe me some of that pleasure in return?"

"You're justifying," I said.

Suddenly he sat up, pushing me aside.  "I don’t believe this!  I make a simple request and I get shot down. I thought you would wanta do it."

"Godd, Conner, I do, more than anything in the world. It'd be a dream come true, for anybody, but……"

"Then what? I want to go back knowing what it's like.  I mean….I know it must be such a wonderful feeling, I can tell how much you like it and how you look when I'm doing it to you, and it's got me serious.  I want to know that feeling." 

For a moment I couldn't answer. I felt like shit.  It wasn't payback at all; he truly wanted to experience getting fucked, he had planned this as a special time, and I'd ruined it.  I wanted to cry. I waited too long to reply. 

"Fuck it," he growled.  "I'll find somebody else."  With that he sat up, about to get out of bed.

"Conner, wait….Conner….please….I'm sorry." He was reaching for his prosthesis.  I grabbed his arm.  "Please, don't.  I'm sorry."

"I don't want sorry," he said, leaning back on his elbows.  "I want fucked.  What part of that don't you understand?"

"I just thought you were trying to pay me back for……"

"So what? What's so fuckin' wrong with wanting to do something for somebody who's done so much for me?" he cut in.  "I'm leaving tomorrow, Todd. I'm not afraid of it but I'm smart enough to know everybody doesn't come back, and my chances of that are as good as the next guy's.  I want it for me, but I want this for us. I want to take it with me, something special to hang onto.  I wanta leave you something……"  His words cut off as he laid his head back between his shoulders, his eyes closed.

His words penetrated my soul. He wanted it for us?....wanted something special to take with him and hang onto?.....This was way more than payback."And I fucked it up," I whispered as I swung my legs around and sat on the edge of the bed. I was about to cry.  But then I felt his hand on my shoulder.

"Listen, we can start over," he offered quietly.

I glanced over my shoulder to see the boy in the man, an innocence in his deep, dark eyes that I hadn't seen before. Then the boyish grin spread across his handsome face.

"I don't usually give a guy a second chance to fuck my ass, but for you I'll make an exception."

His grin shattered the tension and I couldn't help but laugh as I leaned back over him.

"I won't blow it this time," I said.

"Well, I was kinda hoping you would, later," he said.

We rolled together in laughter and ended up in a tight embrace with his legs on either side of me. He lifted his legs and the laughter died away. He reached down to grope my bulging shorts and tugged at the waistband. He pulled them down in front and my cock burst free against his warm flesh. I didn’t know where he got the lube he handed me as he brought his legs up higher, almost bent in half now. His stomach muscles bulged, drawn tight as a drum.

"Godd, Conner, I can't believe we're doing this," I said as I flipped the cap open to squeeze the thick lube into the crack of his ass.

"Me, either," he said.

I didn't bother with lube on my cock; there was enough in his ass.  When my cock touched him he wrapped his arms around the back of his thighs.

"Don't worry about taking it easy," he said.

"All right."  And I didn't.  I aimed and set the head of my cock against his warm, slick hole and shoved. My cock penetrated the tight orifice and sank into the warm depths of his body in one gentle thrust.

I gasped, "Ohh, My Godd!"

He groaned, "Aww, Yeahhh!" 

I could tell his little outburst masked the pain I was causing but I gave no quarter.  I thrust in the final inches and held in tight so he would know I was in him, then I pulled back.

"You said you didn't want it easy," I said as I thrust back in to begin fucking him.

He let go of his legs and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.  "Fuck me hard.  I wanta know I've been fucked, and I gotta remember this for a long time," he growled.

Because he was Conner, I gave him the best fuck I'd ever given anybody in my life.  He howled every time my cock slid across his prostate. He moaned when I pulled back and the rim of my cock tugged on his clenching asshole. But soon, gradually, it went from a hard fuck to something more tender and meaningful.  It turned into making love.  I sensed it when I saw Conner's eyes were wet and he was biting his lip. His emotions that he was fighting sparked mine and swept through me.  I hugged his left leg and kissed the blunt end.  I more than kissed it, I showered it with kisses.

Conner choked and whimpered.  "Aww, fuck, Todd, you're making me feel so good.  Besides just the fucking."

I hugged his leg tighter and unashamedly let my tears baptize the still scarred surface and kissed them away as they fell.

"I love you, Conner…..Godd, I love you so." The words were mine, the voice wasn't.  The words surprised me.  I had not thought of love in that sense before this moment.

"Give it to me to take with me," he whispered hoarsely.  "I want your love inside me.  I need it to protect me."

There's no way to describe the emotions that engulfed me. When I came my love gushed into him in great torrents and he said he could feel it washing through him, galvanizing his very soul. He said it would be his body armor. He still held me tight long after I'd finished cumming. I remained in him till I imagined every drop, every live cell, was absorbed into every fiber of his being, making us one.

As I pulled out I kissed the wet from his eyes.

"Godd, what have you done to me?" he whispered. "I feel like a whole new man."

"You're the same man you always were," I said.

"Thanks to you."

"Don't make this about payback," I said.  "It was a lot more than that."

"Yeah, I…..I felt it to," he said hesitantly. He eased his hold on me and I rose up and lay beside him. "You know you've changed me forever," he said huskily.

"I don't think I'm ever going to be the same either," I said.

"You….you said you love me."

"I do.  I'm not ashamed to say it," I said.

"As much as I love you, Todd, I don't know if I can love a man in that way."

"I'm not asking you to."

"What are you asking?"

"I'm not asking anything.  But I want you to take with you my love that's inside you and give it time to take root.  If it does, and if you can love me back, that will be beautiful.  If it doesn't, then I only pray you can accept my love, and that will be beautiful, too."

"For right now, I can only say I've never felt so close to anyone in my life….so much a part of someone," he said. "And I've never let anyone get so close to me."

I had my hand firmly in his crotch. I ran it down the inside of his left thigh to where his knee would have been. 

"You know I'm not glad this happened, Conner.  I would give my leg for you to have yours back. But it's what brought us together."

"Is that what attracted you, my disability?" he said jokingly.

I laughed. "I was attracted when I walked in your room for the first time. You got my attention when you stripped down that first time to shower. And if you think you're going to get any sympathy from me over this….." I squeezed the solid muscle of his left thigh. "Hell, you didn't need a prosthesis. You're carrying a spare leg between your thighs. Just make damn sure you bring this back with you," I said, squeezing his cock.

He was smiling.  "I've never felt like this before in my life….so complete.  You've made me the happiest man on the planet.  I don't want to leave."

"Yes you do. Don't try to lie to me about your other, true love. The Marines is your first love. I know that.  I'll be happy with what's left over."

He leaned up and removed his dog tags. I knew they were there, but it was the first he'd drawn attention to them.  He removed one, pressed it to his lips then pressed it into my hand.

"I want you to keep this till I come back for it. And know this.  If I ever do fall in love with a man, it'll be you."

The End. 

Posted: 01/30/15 rp