Love is Blind
By: Nick Brady
(© 2019 by the author)

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

Chapter 2
The Lake 

Ian was sitting just inside the door to our boarding house when I walked in. I turned to him and he spoke first.

“Hi, Andrew. I beat you here.”

I laughed and asked, “How did you know it was me?”

He stood without answering, “I'm hungry. Are you ready to eat?”

“Yeah, sure. I'm ready.” I walked to the long table and found a pair of seats. “Here you go.” I stopped and sat down.

Ian stopped behind me, turned, touched the back of the chair and pulled it out to sit next to me. He folded his cane to put it out of the way, put his hands on the table to locate the plate and cutlery then sniffed the air. “Oh, we're having chicken and dumplings I think, and green beans. It smells good.”

There were not as many guys at the table on Saturday as during the week. I asked Ian, “Can I help you with this?” I wondered if I was offending his independence.

He chuckled and said softly, “I can manage by myself, but if you serve my plate it's not as messy. Tell me where things are like on a clock.”

I filled his plate with what he had correctly guessed was on the table. “Chicken and dumplings at 12 o'clock, green beans at 4 and cornbread at 8,” I said quietly.

He located his glass of ice tea, used the cornbread as a probe to locate things and slid them onto his fork. "Is there dessert?" he asked when we were finished.

I looked around and saw small dishes of cake on a side table. “Just a minute. I'll get us some.”

When I returned and set the plate in front of him, he took a deep breath and smiled. “Oh good. Chocolate is my favorite.”

When we were finished, he carefully wiped around his plate with a paper napkin, then wiped his face and laid the napkin on his plate. “That was pretty good. Sort of like Sunday dinner on Saturday. Are we ready to go?”

We walked outside and down the street to where my car was parked.

“Where are we going,” Ian asked.

“I thought we could run out to Lake Carl Blackwell. Have you ever been out there?”

“No. Is it far?”

“It's about 8 miles west of town. We can be there in 10 or 15 minutes. It's a decent size lake. You can camp there, go fishing, swimming, whatever.”

“That sounds like fun.”

“Do you like to fish? Can you swim? Have you ever been camping?” I was curious.

“Ian laughed. “I can swim. They had a pool at the school, but I've never been camping unless you count sleeping in a cabin once.”

“Well, that would count. I was in Scouts and we camped quite a bit.”

“Really? Like in a tent? That would be an adventure.”

“I have a little two-man tent and a few camping things in my room. I was thinking about going out some weekend.”

Ian smiled but didn't say anything.

“They have a swimming beach out at the lake,” I recalled. “It's hot today. Would you like to go for a swim?

“A swim might be nice," Ian agreed. "I don't have a swimsuit. Would gym shorts be OK?"

“Sure. Let me get you across the street to your house.”

When I took him by the arm and he stopped me. “Let me take your arm. That works better for me.”

Ian put his hand lightly in the crook of my elbow and we walked across the street as far as his front door. “I'm good from here,” he said. “I'll be back in a minute.”

I sat down on the front steps and waited for him. He didn't take long. “I think I'm ready.” He was carrying a pair of white gym shorts and a towel.

"Here's my old car," I said and led him to where I was parked. "It's an old Chevrolet. Nothing flashy, but it's dependable and gets me around. Have a seat and I'll get my suit." He found the door handle and waited while I dashed up to my room. In a few minutes, we were driving to the lake.

I hesitated, then asked, “You're the first blind guy I've really known. I know you can do most everything on your own, but I'd be happy to help you if it makes things easier for you.”

Ian laughed. “I have to be independent if I'm going to manage, but sometimes it's helpful to have a friend. If you don't mind my taking your arm when we're walking together, it does make it faster.”

“Of course. I'm learning a lot from you. Maybe I should just let you ask for help if you need it.”

“OK. I'll try not to be too stubborn." He hesitated, "Tell me what it's like around here. I mean, is it flat, hilly? Are there a lot of trees?"

“It's rolling hills. Central Oklahoma is pretty flat. A few wooded areas, but not much else.”

“Where have you been?” Ian asked. “Have you traveled much?”

“Not a lot. When I was in the Scouts, we went to some places in Arkansas that were nice. What about you?”

“Not so much. Back and forth to Ardmore, mostly. My father was always working. We did some little day trips when I was in school, but nothing exciting."

I turned on the car radio and we listened to some music on the short drive to the lake. I pulled up to the swimming beach and shut off the motor. “Here we are,” I told him.

The car windows were down to give some relief from the heat and there was a soft breeze blowing. Ian leaned his head back and took a deep breath. “I can smell the lake,” he said.

“I don't really smell anything. What does it smell like?”

“Muddy. A few dead fish not far away. I smell exhaust fumes from boats out on the lake.”

I looked out at the water and saw a couple of outboard motor boats carrying fishermen around. “You're right. I hadn't noticed them until you said that. You're very aware of what's around you.”

“I am. There are more senses than sight. I see with hearing and smell,” he said. “And touch.”

I thought about that. “How would you know what a person looks like? Does that make any sense? What do you think I look like?”

Ian tipped his head back. “You're taller than me. I'm five foot six. You're about five eleven. I'm guessing you're white by your speech pattern and a native Oklahoman by your accent.” Ian chuckled softly. “I go a lot by a person's voice. I told you that you have a nice voice. You seem relaxed by which I gather that you are comfortable with yourself. I imagine that you are slender and fit. I know that you are a clean person because you often smell like soap.”

“That's amazing. You don't miss much, do you? Is there anything you don't know about me?”

“I go a lot by what I pick up about a person's character. I know that you're a considerate person. You've been very kind to me.”

“You didn't mention touch.”

“No, but I do know that when you took my arm you were gentle. When I took your arm I could tell that you were muscular.  That's why I assumed you to be fit. That and your breathing is even. I think you've done some sports.”

“I was a swimmer in high school,” I laughed. “I guess when I think about what a person looks like, I think about how tall they are and stuff like that, but the first thing I do is look at is their face - their eyes especially. The expression on their face tells me a lot about them. That's different for you.”

“But I hear the tone of their voice, whether they are tense or relaxed. If they speak loudly or softly. The way they say things. Those are expressions too.”

“Yes, but you can't see my face. Maybe that's not really important.”

“It does matter, I suppose. I remember...” He paused and smiled.

“Remember what?”

“When I was about six, my mother took me to a big shopping mall and we stopped to have my picture taken with Santa. I knew who Santa was of course. He was the guy who brought my presents, so I was very excited. I wanted to know if he had a beard and started to check him out when my mother stopped me. "Hands!" she said. Which meant that I was not to put my hands on his face. Santa assured her that he didn't mind at all so I was given permission. I reached up and carefully felt of his face, his cap, and his beard. I was excited to realize that he had a real beard which meant that he must have been the real Santa. He was really nice about it."

I tried to picture the exchange between little Ian and the real Santa. “That's a nice story,” I said.

“I got what I wanted for Christmas too,” he laughed.

“I wouldn't mind if...” I started to say it was OK with me if Ian wanted to touch my face, but stopped myself.

Maybe Ian knew what was coming because he sat up and asked, “Do you want to walk around a little? Maybe go down to the lake?”

“Right, sure.” I got out and walked around to the passenger side to open the door. “The swimming beach is right here if you want to get wet.”

“That might be nice. Can we change here?”

I opened the back door, took out my swim trunks and handed the gym shorts to him. I stepped back, slipped off my jeans and underwear then tossed them into the back seat. I started to turn my back but realized that wasn't necessary. Ian turned toward the car and changed quickly.

Ian knew which way to turn but hesitated and held out his hand. I offered my arm and we headed down the grassy incline towards the water. I looked over at Ian's bare torso and was surprised to see that he was slender but very muscular.

“You look fit,”

“I was on the wrestling team,” Ian said. “That's one of the few sports that doesn't require sight. In fact, being accustomed to going by sound and touch might be an advantage.”

“I never thought about that,” I admitted. “Here's the water. The bottom is gravel and not that even. You might want to leave your shoes on and keep hold of my arm.”

Ian smiled and bravely stepped out into the water. “Oh, it's warm. I was hoping it was cooler.”

“It will be farther out from the bank. The sun warms it up where it's shallow.”

“Sure. That makes sense.”

We walked out until the water was waist deep then squatted down and stuck our heads under water. Ian brought his head up and sputtered, “You're right. It's cooler on the bottom. That feels nice. This is fun!”

“Have you gone swimming in a lake before?”

“No. Just in a swimming pool. What's around me?”

“The other side of the lake is quite a way off, but there's a dock about 50 yards over to our left. Want to swim over to it?”

“I've never swum in open water before. Will you swim with me?”

“Sure. I'll be right next to you. Will that work?”

“You swim straight for the dock and I can hear you off to my side. Just don't run off and leave me.”

“I won't,” I laughed and splashed off for the dock. Ian fell in beside me as I tried to set a steady pace. He was a good swimmer and had no trouble keeping up with me. When we got close to the dock, I slowed down and yelled, “Here we are.” I put out my hand and tapped him on the shoulder when we were a few feet away, then took his hand and put it on the side of the dock.

I vaulted myself up on top then leaned over to take his hands and tugged him up to sit next to me. “You're a good swimmer,” I told him.

“Thanks. That was a new experience!”

I looked at Ian. His muscular body was wet and shining, his eyes were dancing from side to side and he had a huge grin on his face. He looked very different from the cautious person I met a few weeks earlier. “Did you enjoy that?”

“Yes!” he laughed. “That felt so free! No ropes, no concrete wall, Thanks for letting me swim with you.”

“My pleasure.” I felt a wave of affection for Ian. It was nice to see him so elated. We stretched out of our backs and let the sun dry us. “College is going to be a different world for you, isn't it?”

 “I think so. You know, I'm grateful to the Blind School. They looked after me and taught me everything I know from the time I was five years old until I graduated. But I wasn't really free there. To be sure, I was safe. But there were a lot of restrictions on where we could go, what we could do, even what opinions we were to have. It's not a Christian school exactly, but a lot of the volunteers were from fundamentalist churches and they had very specific ideas about what was right and what was wrong.”

“They were pretty conservative?”

“Oh yes. Lots of 'thou shalt nots' It feels good to be free of that – free to do new things, make new friends, have new ideas. Free to swim in open water,” he laughed again. “It feels great.”

“You make it sound like you were a prisoner.”

“No, no. Not like that. There were no locks. I guess I could have left if I wanted to, but where would I go? I shouldn't talk like this. I made some friends there and they taught me a lot, but I was ready for a change.”

I reached out my hand and laid it on his arm. “I'm glad you came here. I think you could say we are friends.”

Ian sat up and turned to sit facing me. He was not exactly looking right at me, but he squared away in my direction. “Yes, you my first friend here, and maybe the best friend I've ever had. I do appreciate you, Andrew.”

I sat up and moved closer to him, then I took his hands and brought them to my face. He looked surprised, then began to very gently run his hands over my face, tracing the outlines of my eyes and nose and lips. He placed his hands on both sides of my head determining its shape and the placement of my ears. He ran his hands under my chin and down over my chest, then across my shoulders and down my arms, finally taking my hands in his. “You are very beautiful,” he said softly.

I wasn't sure what to say. “So are you. You're really a great looking guy. I guess you know that.”

Ian put his hands in his lap. “No, I don't think anybody ever told me that. But then, when all your friends are blind, that's not surprising. Do you really think so?”

“Yeah, I do. You're very nice looking. At least that's my opinion.”

Ian lowered his head. “Thanks. That's nice of you to say.”

“I'm not just saying that to be nice, Ian.”

It got quiet. “Should we be getting back?” he asked.

“Sure. Jump in and we'll swim to shore.”

I slipped down into the water and waited for Ian to join me. I tapped him on the shoulder and started swimming slowly. When he caught up with me I increased my pace and we swam side by side until the water was shallow enough to stand up. He took my arm and we walked up to the car.

“Here's your towel," I said and we dried off. He turned away from me to first pull on his T-shirt, then drop his wet shorts, put on his pants and sit down in the car. I dressed and climbed behind the wheel. "I'm sorry if what I said was out of line."

“No. Not out of line. I said what I meant and so did you. It's just that... It's hard to say. When you're blind, it's easy for people to think they can take advantage of you. The safe thing to do is to keep people at arm's length. I'm beginning to feel close to you and that seems awkward. I'm not used to feeling that way.”

“I'm really sorry, Ian. I didn't mean to make you feel awkward.”

“No, it's nothing you did. It's my problem. Maybe I'm not as tough as I like to think I am. I get by pretty well, but to be honest, sometimes I'm aprehensive. I've come from a very sheltered environment to a big college campus and I'm on my own for the first time. It's a big change, Andrew. Then you come along and make things easier for me. I meant it when I said I appreciate you.”

“So what's the problem? I think you're interesting. I've never known anybody like you. It's amazing what you can do. Besides that, you're smart and funny. I like you. You're a neat guy. Don't push me away.”

Ian clasped his hands together in his lap and rocked back and forth a little. “You're not just being nice to me because you feel sorry for me?”

“No! Because I don't feel sorry for you. I like you, admire you even, but I certainly don't pity you. If I can help you with something, I'm happy to do it, but it's not because I feel sorry for you. I want to help you because, well, because I like you – because we're friends. Why is that so hard to understand?”

“But I can't do anything for you. I can pay you to read to me, but I can't repay your kindness.”

I put my hand on his shoulder. “Ian. Friendship isn't a business arrangement. There's no price tag on friendship. Look, I'm not that nice a guy. We wouldn't be sitting here if I didn't like you.”

Ian put his hand on top of mine. “Thank you,” he said. “I think I'm ready to go back if that's alright with you.”

I squeezed his shoulder and took my hand away to start the engine and pull out of the park. We drove back to Stillwater in silence.

When we got back to town Ian suggested, “It's getting to be time for supper. Would you like a pizza?”

“I could eat. Want to go to the Campus Hideaway?”

“Sure. I've heard it was good.”

When we pulled up in front of the popular pizza place, Ian got out of the car, I nudged him with my elbow and we went inside to find a booth. We sat across from each other and a young guy brought us a menu and took our drink order. “What do you like?” I asked Ian.

“I like any kind of pizza. Do you have a favorite?”

“I don't know. Italian sausage with extra cheese?”

“That sounds great. Are they pretty big?”

“They're about standard size but they're thick. Unless you're really hungry I think we could just split a medium.”

“Sure. That would be enough for me. I'm not a big eater,” Ian said.

When our drinks arrived I gave the guy our order and we settled back to wait.

Ian leaned forward and put his hands flat on the table. “I should apologize for getting so emotional. I don't usually do that.”

“You were just being honest and there's nothing wrong with that. I need to know where you're coming from, Ian. I won't know unless you tell me.”

“Well, if we're going to be friends I have to quit being so touchy. I have to start trusting you.”

“It's time to change the subject. Do you have anything for me to read?”

“I do, actually. We could do it tomorrow afternoon or after supper on Monday. Whatever works for you.”

“I have some math to do tomorrow but I can knock that out in the morning. The boarding house doesn't feed us on Sunday. You want to get together for lunch?”

“I think I'll pass on lunch. I plan to go to church in the morning and they always have stuff to eat after the service.”

“OK. How about I come over to your place about two?”

“Sure. That will be perfect.”

Our pizza came and we focused on that until it was gone. After we finished, our waiter brought the check and Ian asked for it. “I'm getting this,” he said firmly.

“We could split it,” I suggested.

“We could split the gas we used going out to the lake too. I want to pay for the pizza.”

I sat back and smiled. “Thanks for the pizza.”

I drove Ian back home, let him out in front of his house and watched him make his way inside. It had been an interesting day.

To be continued...

Posted: 01/01/2021