You Ain’t Santa Claus
by: E Walk

(© 2009 by the Author)
 

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

Chapter 9

Professor Richter

Dan held me, “Kirk, stop worrying about everything and let’s chase our cares away.  This may be the last chance we get for a while.”

We chased the cares away good.  The next thing I remember  was a knock on the bedroom door and the door opening.  Fortunately Dan and I had the sheet over us.  I propped myself up on my elbows and asked, “What happened to the closed door policy?”

Ryan looked confused, “What do you mean, Dad?  We did what you said.  We knocked before we came in.”

Dan sat up and started to laugh, “Dad Kirk, Ryan is right.  You did tell to the boys they should knock if the door was closed.  Boys get up here and I’ll explain the rest of the policy that Daddy Santa forget to tell you.”  

The boys climbed on the bed.  Dan started,  “Sons, after you knock you need to wait until whoever is behind the door tells you to come in,  just in case, they’re doing something they don’t want you to see.”

Nate looked concerned, “Like what, Dad?”

Dan looked at me for help and I nodded, “Like wrapping a surprise present.”

Ryan jumped up, “Okay, we’ll wait until we’re told to come in the next time.  Please get up.  We’re hungry.”

Even though I was naked, I crawled out of bed.  “Guys, why don’t you go ahead and go downstairs, and we’ll be there as soon as we go to the bathroom and get some clothes on.”

Dan had gotten out of bed too and was putting on a pair of sweat pants and a sweat shirt.

When I got down stairs, Nathan was standing on a chair trying to reach the cereal.  I thought to myself, ‘I think we need to rearrange the shelves to make things more accessible for the boys.’

After we finished breakfast and the dishes were done, “Guys, we need to go get dressed so we can take you to the doctor.  Just wear a pair a jeans and a shirt.  If you need any help come get us.  We need to take a shower since we didn’t take one last night.”

I was putting on my shoes when there was a knock on the door.  I looked at Dan and grinned and called out, “Come in, in please.”

Nate spoke for the boys, “Dads, would you please spray our hair so it won’t get messed up?”

I took the boys into the bathroom and ran a brush through their hair and sprayed it, “There you go, gentlemen.”

Ryan smiled his beautiful smile, “Thanks, Dad.”

We got to the doctor’s office in plenty of time and they had a video playing for the boys to watch.  I looked at the forms and realized that I had no idea how to answer what they were asking for on the form.  I handed the form to Dan, “What should I do?  We don‘t know the answers to these questions.”

Dan motioned for Nathan to come to us.  “Nate, when is your birthday?”

“March 7^th.”

I wrote down the information and then pointed to Ryan's chart, “Do you know when Ryan’s birthday is?”

“I think it’s June 26^th.  I know we celebrated it just before our old Dad shot our mother and then killed himself.  Ryan, your birthday is June 26, right?”

Ryan nodded  yes, “Yep.”

I patted Nathan on the back, “Thanks, son.”

Nate went back to watch the show.  I whispered to Dan, “How did you like that bomb?  Things are beginning to make a little more sense, now.  We definitely need to make sure the boys stay with us.”

We had been sitting at a table filling out the form.  Dan leaned over and patted my upper thigh, “You got that right, Daddy Santa.”

I had filled out as much of the forms as I could which was almost nothing and handed them to the young lady at the reception desk.  She took the clip boards, “The doctor will be right with you.”

I had hardly gotten seated before a young man approached us,   “Gentlemen, the doctor would like to speak with you before he sees your sons.”

I looked at the boys, “Guys, the doctor needs to talk to us, first.”

Ryan didn’t even look up, “Okay, Dads.”

The young man took us to the Doctor Caruthers' office.  The doctor stood and extended his hand, “You must be Dr. Richter since I know your friend is Doctor Thornton because I’ve seen him around the hospital.  I’m Larry Caruthers as you might have surmised”

After the introductions were completed, he had us sit down and he came around and pulled up a chair and he started, “Who the heck are these boys that you have with you.  I’ve had two phone calls already this morning about them.  People are threatening to take my doctor’s license away if I don’t do a good job of examining the boys.  The forms you filled out tell me almost nothing.”

Dan pointed to me, I was as concise as I could be in telling what had happened.

Doctor Caruthers kept muttering “Good grief.”

When I told him what Nathan had just told us in the waiting room, he turned white.  He stood, “Gentlemen, I need to meet these two special young boys.”

We went to a large examining room,   The boys were sitting there in their stocking feet. Doctor Caruthers approached the boys and held out his hand, “My, what handsome young men you are.  You can call me Doctor Larry or Doctor Car.”

Ryan shook his hand and giggled, “You can call me Ryan.”

Nate shook his hand, “I’m Nate.”

The doctor had the boys undress except for briefs and socks and he did every check possible.  He certainly was thorough.  He looked at the boys, “We’re almost done. Ryan, why don’t you go with Greg and he’ll show you where we want you to leave your urine or pee sample.”

After Ryan and Nurse Greg had gone into the bathroom, the doctor had Nate stand, “Nate, please push you briefs down to your knees.

He examined Nate's penis and testicles and checked for a hernia.  He had Nate turn and spread his buttocks and I shuddered, ‘Please don’t have him do a rectal exam.’

I was relieved to hear the doctor say, “Okay Nate, pull your briefs up.”

Greg must have known what the doctor was doing because he and Ryan returned, and the boys switched places. 

When Nate had returned, Doctor Car had the boys sit on the exam table, “Guys, we need to do one more test.  I know this is not going to be any fun, but I need to take some samples of your blood.  Greg will be as gentle as he can be.  He will need to take two of these little bottles of your blood and then he will give you each a container of orange juice which I want you to drink before you get dressed.   Greg, when the boys are dressed, bring them to my office.”

When we got to the office and were seated, “Guys, these are two very wonderful young men.  As far as I can tell, they are perfectly healthy.  Just watch for any strange behavior patterns.  With everything that has happened to them. I’m amazed at how well adjusted they seem.”

“I will have their lab tests and examination results ready for you by noon on Monday so that you can take them to the adoption hearing as I was directed to do.”

There was a knock on the door.

Doctor Caruthers called out, “Please come in.”

The boys entered and stood next to Dan and me.  Doctor Caruthers winked at the guys, “Men, since you were so brave, I have a prescription for you.” He pulled out a pad and wrote something and handed it to Nate. He read it and started to laugh.

Ryan looked at the sheet, “Nate, what does it say?”

“It says we need a big hot fudge sundae.”

Ryan went and put his arm around Larry, “You’re not going to give us any shots today?”

“Not this time Ryan, we need to try and find out what shots you already have had, before you have any more. That was one of the reasons we needed to take blood samples.”

Ryan kissed the Doctor, “Thanks, Doctor Car.”

Nate did likewise.

We stood and shook the Doctor’s hands and thanked him.  He looked as if he wanted to say something, but decided not to.  As we started to head toward the reception area, Doctor Caruthers called after us, “You boys be good for your Dads.”

Ryan turned around, “We’ll try very hard to be good, Doctor Car.”

I stopped at the reception desk, “How much do I owe you, young lady?”

She looked at me, “Dr. Richter, the charges have already been taken care of.”

“By whom?”

She shook her head no, “Sir, I’m not at liberty to share that information.”

I looked at Dan and he was as confused as I was. 

We stopped at a Dairy Queen and got the boys their hot fudge sundaes.  It was almost lunch time before we finally got home.

I decided to fix a sandwich, but the boys weren’t hungry, since they had just eaten their sundaes.  Dan had them helping to make sure everything was in order for the arrival of his parents.

As I was driving to the university, I was still trying to figure out why Dean Meyers wanted to see me.  ‘Are they going to fire me?  What did or didn’t I do?’

I was a little early when I got to the Bemis building, so I stopped to pick up what was in my distribution box and there were two journals and some other correspondence, which I put in my briefcase.  As I was walking to my office to hang up my jacket, I passed one of my associates, he smiled “Congratulations, Kirk.”

I stopped and looked at him, “Congratulations for what, Neil?”

Neil turned away, “You’ll find out, soon enough.”

I hung up my overcoat and was looking through the mail.  There were a couple of pieces that looked interesting.  I started to open one, but was interrupted when Dean Meyers walked in, because the door was open.  “Good, you’re here.  Kirk, put your overcoat on, we need to go to the Administration Building.”

I did as I was told and put on my coat.  While we were walking to the Administration building, Dean Meyer commented.  “Kirk, you just did something that no one on our faculty has ever done before.  You have three absolutely brilliant articles appearing in three professional journals in the same month.  I’m sure that you will be asked to make some guest appearances once people have read the three articles.”

‘Okay, so that was why Neil was congratulating me, but why are we going to the administration building?’  We hung up our overcoats and walked into a small assembly hall and I noticed that a number of the people from our department were there, as well as a number of other persons whom I didn’t know.  Dean Meyers guided me to the front row of the auditorium. ‘Why am I sitting in the front row?’

President Armstrong moved to the podium and began, “Thank you for coming, ladies and gentlemen.  This is indeed a special day for some of our faculty.  They are being elevated to the level of full professors.”

It suddenly dawned on me what might be happening.  I heard President Campbell say, “The last person whom I am introducing today has distinguished himself and this university by having articles published in three professional journals in the upcoming January editions, Dr. Kirk Richter.  Kirk, please come forward and be recognized.”

Everything was a blur as President Armstrong handed me a large folder.  He concluded his remarks by saying, “There will be a reception in the foyer, so you can meet the honorees.”

At the reception, I was standing in the receiving line and after everyone had been through, Dr. Armstrong approached me, “Kirk, I understand that you are going to be adopting two sons.  Will and Brandon were at our house last night with Casey and they were telling us how great the two young boys were.  Casey will probably be bugging you guys because he is into model railroading.  I understand that Dan has been promoted and will be working as an assistant to the Hospital Administrator.”

I couldn’t help myself, “President Armstrong, has someone been bugging our house?”

“Not exactly, it seems that in addition to Will and Brandon, Elf John and Bill were at our house with Casey and his friend.  Bill told us that the two boys talked the entire time they were getting their hair styled.”

I started to laugh, “I guess I need to find me a new hair stylist.”

President Armstrong hugged me, “I’ll be waiting to hear what happens on Monday.  It sounds to me as if you should write a novel,  Perhaps you could title it ’The Santa Who Finds Two New Sons.’  We’ll have to discuss that, after I read the first chapter.”

As I was driving home, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.  ‘Dan’s and my world have been taken out of our control by Nate and Ryan.’  When I pulled into the driveway, I saw that Dan’s parents had arrived.

When I walked into the house, Dan was fixing dinner and Ryan and Nate were  talking a mile a minute with Dan’s  parents.  Ryan looked up at me, “Hi Daddy, you should see the neat things that Grandpa and Grandma brought for the train.”

I hugged the Thorntons, “As you can see, we are no longer in control.”

I went to change clothes and when I returned downstairs, everyone was in the kitchen, talking.

Dan looked at me, “Daddy Santa, tell us what happened at the meeting today.”

I chose my words very carefully, “Well, it wasn’t exactly a meeting.  It was more like a Show and Tell.”

Ryan interrupted, “Daddy, what did you have to show and talk about?   You didn’t take any of our train did you?”

I hugged Ryan, “No, I wasn’t the one showing anything.  It was like President Armstrong was using me as his show and tell.”

Nate looked at me, “Dad, what have you been drinking.  You aren’t making any sense.”

Mr. Thornton hugged Nate, “I agree.  He’s talking in circles again.”

Fortunately the conversation was interrupted by Dan, “Dinner is ready to be served, why don’t you young guys help the old people to the table while Daddy Santa helps me serve the dinner?”

As we were eating, I related what happened during the course of the afternoon.  Dad Thornton started to laugh, “It looks as if our grandsons are good luck charms.  First, our Danny gets yanked out of the Emergency Room into an administrative position and then our Erik gets booted up to be a professor so everyone can hate him.”

That comment got a response from Ryan, “Grandpa, why would anyone hate Dad just because he’s now a pro whatever?”

Dad Thornton left himself open but he recovered very nicely, “Guys, when you get to be college students, you will understand.  If someone doesn’t do well in school, many times they will say it was the professor’s fault.”

Ryan was upset, “Dad, if anyone says that about you, tell us and we'll make sure that person knows the truth.”

Dan took charge again, “Come on guys, it’s our night to do the dishes while Daddy Santa visits with your Grandparents.”

Mom Thornton looked at me, “Kirk, you have two diamonds there.  They are wonderful boys.  They really love the two of you.  By the way, we already know about the closed door policy.”

After the dishes were done, we were sitting in the living room and the Thornton’s were sitting on the sofa as we listened to background Christmas music and admired the boys’ Christmas tree.  It was nearly eight o’clock when Ryan announced, “Come on, Nate we need to get ready for bed.  Dads, is it okay if we take a shower in your bathroom?  We promise that we won’t make a mess.”

Dan answered, “Sons, be our guests.”

Nate followed Ryan up the stairs.  It was approximately twenty minutes later when the boys came down the stairs with their dirty clothes and took them to the laundry room.  They hugged and kissed  the four of us and wished us pleasant dreams.

After the boys had vanished, Dad Thornton looked at us, “Guys, why do I need to be here to represent you?  It appears that this should be an open and shut case,  These boys need the two of you and you need them?”
 

Dan looked at his Dad, “Dad, this is not the most liberal part of the world, even though this community is more liberal than the rest of the state.  We have been fortunate in that we have a case worker who understands, but we have no idea what this mysterious uncle has in his mind.  Kirk and I will probably seem as if we are walking a hot bed of coals until we meet him on Sunday.  I think I am safe in saying that we have very much grown to love the two boys in the short time they have been with us.”

To be continued...

Editor's Notes:  I certainly am interested in seeing this mysterious Uncle.  From what was said in the previous chapter, I suspect that he is handicapped in some way, but other than that, we don't really have any information about him, do we? 

It seems to me that the boys are very well adjusted, considering what they have been through.

This story is certainly getting complicated, which is not necessarily a bad thing.  I do wonder what will happen next. I guess I will just have to wait and see. I hope I don't have to wait too long though.

Darryl AKA The Radio Rancher

Posted: 09/25/09