Algeria Here I Come
by: E Walk
(© 2008-2009 by the Author)
 

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Chapter 38
Ambushed Again

I don’t know how we managed it, but we always seemed to be the last to arrive in the dining room.  Probably because so many people stopped to talk to my two guys.

As we were eating, Pastor Hobbs looked at Allie, “I need your help tomorrow at the nondenominational church service.”

Allie looked up “Reverend Hobbs, why don’t you make your grandsons help you.”

Tran shook his head no, “Me and Kim are Buddhists.  We can’t go to a protestant church service.”

Allie dropped his fork on his plate, “Wait a minute, I was a Muslim, but I have decided to become an atheist.  If I have to be there, so do the rest of you.  Didn’t you hear your Granddad say that the service was nondenominational.  What time would you like us to be there Pastor Hobbs?”

Everyone was grinning at the exchanges.  Pastor Hobbs answered, “Harriet and I will meet you in the movie theatre at ten, so you can practice what you’re going to sing.  That way you can sleep late, have a leisurely breakfast and go to the bathroom before you start to practice.”

Allie looked at Pastor Hobbs, “You do realize that we get half of the collection we collect for the poor starving people in the Middle East.  We don’t work for peanuts.  We‘re not monkeys, you know.”

After dinner we had a large entourage going to the theatre.  We were met by cast members in costumes and ushered to our seats.  The young man who was escorting us noted, “Allie and Brahim, you might want to sit where you can get out easily.”

After we were seated, Allie looked at me, “Dad, what did Esteban mean by that comment?”

“Allie, you forget, no one ever tells me anything.”

The cast was expending a lot of energy and the show was great. All of a sudden Esteban, who was the lead male singer, appeared, “Ladies and gentleman, we’re exhausted since we didn’t get much sleep last night.  We need Allie and Brahim to come forward and finish the show for us.  We heard them singing some songs from Andrew Lloyd Weber’s show about Argentina today.  We may be stealing some of the thunder from their show tomorrow, but so it be.  Here are the Safi Brothers.”

The guys climbed out of the row and went to the stage, not knowing exactly what they were going to be doing.  Someone handed them microphones and the spotlight focused on Brahim.  The music started and Brahim began to sing ’Requiem for Evita’  and followed it with ‘Oh, What a Circus’.

When he finished, the spotlights switched to Allie as he sang ‘You Must Love Me’ and immediately started singing ‘Don’t Cry For Me Argentina.’

The audience was stunned by the performance and it took them a few minutes to react.  Everyone was standing applauding as the curtain went up and the cast was standing on either side of my two guys.  Captain Brower appeared on the stage.

‘Ladies and gentlemen, I hope you enjoyed the show as much as I did.  The permanent cast did a fantastic show, after what we went through last evening.  Esteban, please introduce the members of your team.”

Esteban introduced the regular members of the cast.  He added, “We were watching Allie and his friends and Brahim get ready for their show tomorrow, and we all agreed that we absolutely needed Allie and Brahim to be in the show tonight.  I must warn everyone, you will need to come early tomorrow night because the guys have a super show planned for you when Allie meets The Wizard of Oz and Brahim tells you about all the women in his life.”

Alan came out and turned to the cast. “Thanks a lot Esteban.  I don’t have anything left to say except I understand that Allie and his friends will be attending the nondenominational worship service here in the theatre at 11:00 tomorrow morning.  I have heard through the grapevine that they will be singing.  Ladies and gentlemen, have a good night and thankfully we should be able to rest peacefully tonight.”

The audience applauded as the curtain went down.  No one seemed to be in a hurry to leave, because it seemed to take forever for us to get out of the theatre.

When I arrived at the suite, Allie was already sitting next to Brahim in his briefs, “Dad, I don’t think I’ll be leaving the suite for the rest of voyage.  Every time I go anywhere people want me to do something.  I suppose you’re going to desert me and go dancing and drinking.”

I hugged Allie, “I told the others that we would meet them in the Starlight Lounge for a nightcap.”

Our conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Jim, John, Tran and Kim.  They observed how Allie was dressed and immediately started to shed their clothes.  Allie looked at Brahim and me, “We’re going to eat our desserts and go to bed.  Don’t make too much noise when you come in drunk.”

Everyone was rather tired, so we didn’t stay in the lounge very long.  When Brahim and I entered the suite, the lights were out.  We went into our bedroom and there was a note on my pillow.

I picked it up and read it:

My dear Mr. Waller,

You need to call Pastor Hobbs and inform him that we will be unable to assist in the worship service tomorrow.  We have come down with severe cases of yellow fever and scarlet fever and are covered with orange blotches.  Doctor Sorenson has quarantined us for the duration of the cruise, because we’re very contagious.

                                                                                Sincerely

                                                                                Alexander Waller

P.S. Please make sure that we get lots of food brought to us.  Doctor Sorenson informed us that we should eat at least five times a day if we are to recover by the time we reach Fort Lauderdale.

I started to laugh and handed the note to Brahim so he could read it and we heard some giggling outside our door which was ajar.

I went and opened the door wide and the five guys were standing there giggling.  They had orange marks all over their bodies. 

“You five guys get you butts in here.  I’m going to take a picture of you and blackmail you.” 

I picked up my digital camera and took a picture and showed the pictures to the guys.

Tran was almost in tears, “Mr. Waller, you won’t show those to anyone except perhaps our Dads, will you.  Please don’t let any women see them.”

“Guys, I would never show it to anyone to embarrass you.  How are you going to get that paint off of you?”

Allie answered, “After you went to the lounge, we called Lars and he brought some make up and helped us put it on.  It’s water soluble and washes off.  Come on guys, let’s take a shower in here so we can take one together and save time.”

Brahim and I went into the sitting area and were cuddling.  It was approximately five minutes later when five naked ten year old boys were walking through the area to Allie’s bedroom.

After we sure that they were in bed, we went to our bedroom and Brahim started on me, “Ed, we probably need to make sure we give the sea life a double dose of food tonight to keep them happy.  We sure wouldn’t want them to get upset and push us back into the path of the storm again.”

I must admit, Brahim and I were doing our part in making sure the sea life was being fed.  After we had gotten rid of the evidence, Brahim was lying on my shoulder, running his fingers through my pubic hair, “I hope we don’t have to wear those balloons the rest of our lives.”

“Me too, my stud.  I suggest we get some sleep, Allie is probably going to be in rare form tomorrow.”

Boy was I correct in my guess, because all five guys were standing around our bed looking at our naked bodies when I woke up.  When Allie was sure we were awake, he started, “I think Dad would look good in blue and white stripes and we’ll paint Brahim red and white.  I’ll draw the stripes and you guys can get started applying the makeup.”

Allie started with me and drew two white lines down the center of my body from my hairline to my thighs.  He  skillfully avoided touching my penis or testicles.

Allie turned to Jim and John, “Okay, you two can start painting Dad’s body and I’ll get started on drawing the lines on Brahim’s body.  Make sure you cover his pubic area really good so I have some reference points when I draw the lines on his backside.”

I was absolutely astounded by what was happening.  When Allie started on Brahim, Brahim grabbed him. “Alexander Graham Bell Safi, what do you think you and the guys are doing?”

Allie faked a sob, “The laundry called and complained that you and Dad had too many dirty clothes and asked us to see what we could do so you wouldn’t need to wear so many clothes.  We have it all figured out and we’ll paint your bodies black for the next formal night and give you a rainbow colored bow tie and cummerbund.”

I decided to get even, “I know five young guys who are going to be walking the halls naked if you don’t get out of here.”

The five guys left giggling.  Allie turned back and said, “Promises, promises, that’s all we ever get.  Now get up and get dressed; we’re hungry.”

After they had left and the door was shut, I started to laugh, “Bra, I don’t think anyone will ever be able to say that Allie doesn’t have a vivid imagination.”

Bra and I took a quick shower and dressed appropriately to attend the worship service.  The five guys had gone on ahead since Jim and John thought they would be required to go to the Catholic service.  They wanted to be able to eat something before the had to go.

We had just sat down when the public address system was activated, “This is an announcement to tell our guests that the Catholic service has been cancelled for today.  Father Damon is ill.  He has suggested that as many people as possible attend the 11:00 nondenominational service in the theatre.”

Allie looked up from his food, “Guys, it’s a conspiracy; everyone hates us.  Mrs. Dawkins, are you going to go  rehearse for the worship service with us to make sure we get it right.”

She sighed, “Only if you think I need to.  I’m sure Harriet will be able to do a good job without me.  I think I’ll save my energy for tonight.”

The guys finished before everyone else, and asked to be excused.  Allie announced, “We’re going to go to the bathroom and get appropriately dressed for the service.   We’ll probably be so bad that it will take that long for us to get ready for the service.  We’ll be in the movie theatre at ten o’clock.”

After the had departed Brahim and I told everyone what had happened last night and this morning.  I passed the note around so everyone could read it.  I passed around the digital camera with the shots I had taken of the guys with their orange dots and I thought some of the people were going to fall out of their chairs because they were laughing so hard.

That was nothing compared to the reaction as when Brahim and I explained what happened this morning.  Even Josef and Carlos were laughing so hard they almost dropped the dishes they were carrying away from the table.

Mrs. Dawkins sputtered, “The guys should have called me so I could have supervised.”

Khalid chuckled, “It’s too bad the guys didn’t take any pictures of you this morning.  I guess we’ll need to lock the door leading to the veranda in our suite from now on.”

Keith Hobbs smirked, “Ed, I think that you need to have some prints made of the guys with their orange dots, so we can use them for blackmail.”

Mrs. Dawkins added, “Make sure you make a set for me.  You probably should make a copy for each of us.  This is certainly one cruise I’m not going to soon forget.”

Brahim and I went to our suite to relax until it was time for us to go to the theatre.  We were on the veranda, reading when Khalid, Amir, Darryl and Uncle Tom arrived.  Darryl started, “Ed and Brahim, as soon as you get settled, you need to let us know what’s happening so we can keep in touch.  The three of you have become very special to Tommy and me.”

Amir looked at Darryl and Uncle Tom, “Darryl and Tom, you aren’t the only people whose hearts these three guys have wormed their way into.  Khalid and I knew them first.  You  don’t live half way around the earth as we do.  We’ll be lucky to see them once a year.  You two on the other hand can catch a flight from Chicago and be in Houston in a matter of hours.”

The discussion was interrupted by the arrival of the five guys, Allie announced, “We came to get a snack before the Supreme Being sends a bolt of lightening to strike us down for being so bad.  Guys, grab a piece of fruit and a container of juice to hold us.   We need to make sure we go to the bathroom before we go to the theatre.”

The guys accomplished what they came for and departed, so the six of us who had been visiting decided we had better go too.

When we arrived in the theatre, I was surprised to see how many people were there.  The show staff was passing out bulletins for the service which contained the outline of the service and a copy of the hymns that were to be sung.

Our five guys were sitting as if they were a choir.  When it was time for the first hymn, the five guys stood.  Since they were wearing head microphones their voices resonated throughout the theatre as they sang along with those who were in attendance.

When it came time for the special music, Pastor Hobbs announced, “We are pleased to have five very special young men here today to truly make this a nondenominational worship service.  Two of the young men are Catholics, two were born of Buddhist parents and the fifth young man was a Muslim but has decided to become an atheist.  They will be singing two African American spirituals for us today.”

“Here they are singing the first of their songs.”

The five guys stood and moved to the front of stage and sang ‘Kumbaya’.  When they finished Allie approached the center of the stage, “Ladies and gentlemen, last week we designated that the money we collected would go to help the poor people of Africa.”

“Any money we collect today will be designated to be sent to agencies who are involved with helping children in the war torn countries of the Middle East.  Please give generously.  While the staff is collecting your contributions, we will be singing another spiritual ‘This Little Light Of Mine’.

The production staff appeared with baskets and collected any money that people chose to give.  Estaban and Lars took the money to Allie and his prayer of thanks of was very powerful.  “Dear Creator, whoever you are, please make sure that these small tokens are used wisely to help those young people who are less fortunate than us.  We praise you and ask for your help to make these gifts multiply.  We thank you.”

Reverend Hobbs went to the podium, “Ladies and gentlemen, I have a complaint.  That young man has been playing havoc with my life ever since we arrived.  This is the second week in a row that he has caused me to revise my message at the last minute.”

“As you can see, from the program, the title of the message is, ‘The Supreme Being Doesn’t Hate Us.’  It was conceived because Allie asked his traveling companion, Mr. Waller, if a supreme power was trying to tell him that he was evil by putting us in the path of the hurricane.”

“I am here to remind all of you that the Supreme Being, whoever you think he is, is just reminding each of us that we are not perfect and that we were put here to make our world a better place to live.  Now, let’s close this service by singing our last song.”

As the last song finished, we watched as the five guys disappeared off the stage.  They obviously had chosen to make a fast exit and had gone up the service elevator to the suite.

When Brahim and I arrived in the suite, the five guys were already eating.  Allie glared at me, “Dad, I’m never going to talk to you again.  You don’t need to tell everyone everything about our private lives.”

To be continued...

Editor's Notes:  Isn't it strange that sometimes we end up hurting people's feelings even when we are only celebrating the wonders of their creativity.  I don't think Allie and the others will hold it against Ed for too long, but it might have been nicer if Ed had at least asked the boys before he showed the pictures to other people.  I am sure he is sorry he did it, now, but I bet the embarrassment he caused will take a while to wear off.

I have always been somewhat of a smartalac, and when my life partner and I were much younger I teased him mercilessly about a couple of things that he did.  One of them was the fact that he whistles through his teeth.  At least he calls it whistling, but I told him time and time again that it wasn't really whistling. One day I happened to hear him talking on the phone to a dear friend of ours, and he was telling him that it really hurt his feelings when I teased him like that.  Somehow, I had never managed to notice that I was causing so much pain.  At that moment, I made the decision that I would never tease him again, and I have mostly stuck to that promise that I made to myself.  I am sixty two years old, and he is going to be sixty by the time you read this.  We have been together for more than thirty eight years, so we have been partners for more than half our lives.  I love him so much and I know he loves me too. I will never do anything to hurt him if I can possibly help it.

Your Friend,

Darryl

Posted: 07/31/09