A Helping Hand
By: DL
(Copyright 2007-2016 by the Author)
The author retains all rights. No reproductions are
allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...
dl@tickiestories.us
You know how it is when you’ve lost the plot and forgotten something rather important? The problem, generally speaking, is that you don’t know that you have forgotten something, precisely because you have forgotten it! And I had indeed forgotten something . . . that I had bought sundry electrical items on Thursday and Saturday from Currys in Bury St Edmunds! My memory was refreshed by a van pulling up across my driveway — I didn’t see it, but Stella drew my attention to it: “Dave, are you expecting anything else?” she asked.
I turned round on hearing her speak and thus saw the van driver starting up my drive carrying a long brown box. “Oh shit!” I exclaimed as I suddenly remembered, completely forgetting — I would never have said it if I had remembered there was a lady present — that Stella was standing by my window watching [and unaware that the boys had just re-entered the lounge just after I had turned towards Stella and the window].
I was made aware of the boys presence by a burst of laughter behind me and turning towards the sound, I saw Juan standing by the end of the dining table, laughing with Julian behind him, frowning. “You forgot about the TV and VCR, didn’t you Dave?” Juan said. “What TV and Video?” Julian asked on hearing this.
It was Juan who answered the question: “You know when I met you? Well after we left MFI, Dave drove me across the car park and out and into Currys car park where he bought a TV and VCR for my bedroom as well as the Walkman, CDs and headphones for me.” Light dawned on Julian and he smiled as he said “and he arranged for them to be delivered on Monday as well as the furniture. . .” I finished off for him “. . . and the Freezer I bought while you were shopping in Sainsbury’s on Saturday!”
By this time the driver had reached the door and rang the doorbell. There was nothing else to do but answer the door: so I did! “Are you Mr B——?” the driver asked after consulting his clipboard. What else could I say? “Yes, that’s me.” I replied. “I have an Amstrad VCR . . .” he pointed at the box at his feet on my doorstep “. . . a Sony Television and Phillips Chest Freezer on the van for you, but could someone give me a hand to get them off?” he continued.
“Of course — not a problem.” I replied, picking up the VCR and turning back to the lounge, I grinned sheepishly at the trio within and said “Julian, can you give the man a hand get the other bits in please?” Julian let go of Juan and moved forwards, giving me an old-fashioned look as he passed me on his way to the front door.
I hurriedly disappeared down the hall and dumped the VCR with the growing pile of furniture in the bedroom and managed to get back down the hall and into the lounge just before they got there with the TV! I got out of their way smartly and went and got my keys from my jacket and hurriedly opened the garage door before they got back and was in time to ask “Would you mind putting the Freezer in here?” as the driver came out of my front door.
The driver didn’t break his stride — he just looked where I pointed and nodded — as he headed back to his van with Julian in tow. As it turned out it was just as well that I wanted the Freezer in the garage as I hadn’t thought about its size — and as the driver and Julian approached with the Freezer it was obvious to me that it wouldn’t have fitted through the front door!
Getting it in the garage, however, was a breeze as I had fully opened the up-and-over door to its fullest thus making sure that no-one was in danger of hurting themselves on it. The driver and Julian deposited the freezer at the far end where I had asked them to and I slipped the driver a fiver unobtrusively as I thanked him whilst returning his clipboard after signing for the delivery.
I closed the garage door and made my way back into the house [LOL: have I mentioned that chez Dave was in fact a bungalow?], where I found that Stella had retreated to her place on the bed/settee and the 2Js were leaning against the dining table with their arms around each other. “Mmm, that wasn’t the only thing that I forgot was it, Julian?” I said as I closed the door behind me and went and sat on the window end of the bed/settee [Stella was on the dining table end].
“What do you mean, Dave? How would I know what you might or might not have forgotten?” Julian asked interrogatively in response to my question. “Well, correct me if I’m wrong, but you have just helped to deliver the new bedroom furniture I ordered on Thursday when Juan and I met you at work?” I asked, and Julian lost no time in falling into my trap: “Yes, as well as the furniture you ordered on Friday when you picked me up for the weekend here!” he rejoined.
“Quite so, although I foolishly haven’t checked the delivery to ensure everything was there before I signed the driver’s note — I was distracted.” I said and Julian coloured up as my remark about distractions went home and he gripped the other “distraction” even further to ensure it was still there and Juan grinned as he also got what I meant.
“You know that if anything’s wrong, getting it sorted won’t be a problem, don’t you?” Julian said and I evilly remarked “Especially if it happens to be a bed?” and once more Julian coloured up slightly. “But as it happens that wasn’t what I meant. Do you remember Thursday night when I made a remark as you and Juan were sat on the bed/settee about getting a new three piece suite for here?” Julian nodded slowly, and I think he was wracking his brains, having an inkling that he knew where this conversation was leading but unable to quite discern ‘where’ yet.
“If you remember I asked you if we could get one along with the other bed room furniture when I picked you up on Friday.” I continued, “but you only shew me the bedroom items, didn’t you? Maybe your mind had something weighing on it that distracted you . . .” This caused Julian to colour up once again and continue to clasp his boy, who it has to be said, wasn’t objecting at all!
Stella interrupted at this point: “Yes, I’m sure he did, and I’m also sure who that distraction was!” at this interjection from his mum, Julian flushed a deeper shade of red and Juan also coloured up as well, realising exactly what his boyfriend’s mum meant.
“But you didn’t say anything!” Julian retorted and I couldn’t deny the truth of this. “True, mea culpa, I forgot that you had forgotten it!” was my reply. Stella laughed at this interplay and all of us looked at her and she said “Well, I’m sorry for laughing, but it was starting to sound a bit like a Whitehall farce!” she exclaimed.
I couldn’t help myself and burst out laughing as well, but Julian, obviously lost by his mum’s allusion to the genre of comedy championed by Noel Coward and Brian Rix in the UK in the 1950s through to the 1970s, looked completely blank until his mum put him out of his misery by explaining the reference.
“Can you get us all a drink, boys” I said to the 2Js as I stood up and went over to the phone and called the Coaching House and apologised for the fact that we had unfortunately been delayed and would be late but were definitely coming. The proprietor was absolutely fine, thanked me for letting him know and said it wouldn’t be a problem as they had free tables as usual at the start of the week.
I returned to my seat and was amused to see that Juan carried two red cans of Coke over to the dining table and pulled out a chair the far side so he was facing Stella and I whilst Julian handed me a silver Diet Coke can and his mum a glass obviously containing Coke [of some sort] and seeing my look, he coloured up again and said “Mum never drinks from a can” by way of explanation as he continued over to take a seat beside his boyfriend.
Stella smiled at her son’s outburst and said “Julian’s absolutely right, but then he should know as he’s lived all his life with me and I’ve tried to bring him up properly.” This brought a smile from Juan as Julian — who had taken a gulp from his can just after his mum started speaking — choked on his drink.
I smiled as well and said to the boys “While you were getting the drinks I phoned the restaurant and explained that we would be a little late arriving.” Julian couldn’t help himself “But what about the furniture?” he said and I grinned as I answered “Its OK, its perfectly safe where it is and there’s no hurry to get it all unpacked, is there?”
I couldn’t help noticing Stella smiling behind her glass as I said this, and I am fairly sure she knew her son well enough to know how he would view that. Strangely enough it didn’t draw any response from Julian and looking back I think that may have been because Julian was a little bit embarrassed about discussing his longed for new sleeping arrangements with his boyfriend in his mum’s presence.
We sat and finished our drinks and I waited patiently until Stella [who finished last] had put her glass on the coffee table before I stood up and said “Right, shall we make a move?” as I went and got my jacket [and keys] from the hall. I clicked the car’s remote as I opened the front door and held it for Stella and the boys to exit.
As I closed the door behind me I was amused to see Julian manoeuvre past his boyfriend and reach out to open the car’s rear passenger door — obviously for Juan — and his reaction at his mum’s exclamation: “Julian!” [he coloured up again and then turned toward her!] Julian obviously knew what he’d done wrong as he left the rear door and instead reached round his mum and opened her door for her!
He waited whilst she got in and fixed her seatbelt before closing the door and opening the rear door for Juan and I noted that whilst he had waited for his mum to fix her seatbelt before closing the door in Juan’s case he actually leaned in and fixed the seatbelt for him before closing the door, going round the front and getting in the other side and scooting over to be beside Juan.
I got in and started the car and said to Stella before driving off, “Do you know the Coaching House?” she smiled and said “If you mean the one at Lawshall then yes, I do — Frank and I went there several times before we divorced.” As she said it, I remembered Julian’s knowing about the concealed bell push and guessed [correctly as I later established] that the family had frequented the restaurant.
It didn’t take long to get there and we were only a little over 20 minutes late as I drove into the car park. I couldn’t help noticing that whilst Julian was first out of the car he didn’t repeat his earlier mistake — he went round the front and opened his mother’s door first! Stella made her way to the door and Julian closed her door and opened Juan’s while I waited for them so I could lock it before going inside.
The boys made their way to the door and I followed them. Inside, Stella had obviously told the proprietor who we were, and he had shown her to the same table the 2Js and I had occupied on our last visit. As we entered the proprietor merely pointed us towards our table and I stopped and apologised to him once again for our late arrival.
Stella had taken the seat I would have occupied through choice [facing the car park and door, LOL] and I arrived just in time to see and hear Stella put a spoke in the works: “Julian, dear, you can sit beside me so I can talk to Juan and Dave without having to keep turning round.” Julian stopped in his tracks and I thought we might have a small problem but he hesitated only briefly before doing his mother’s bidding and going round the table and taking the seat beside her. I took pity on Juan and motioned him to the seat opposite Julian before taking my place opposite Stella.
To be continued . . .
Feedback always welcome: dl@tickiestories.us
Posted: 08/19/16