When I was eighteen years old, my mother left us. Or rather, my dad kicked her out. She'd been cheating on him, not with one other man, but several. He'd tolerated it for some time, but finally had enough. I was glad to see her go. She'd never been a real mother to me. She was never home, spending many nights away and coming home at dawn, drunk and mean. She was a horrible woman, and I hated her. How often I longed for a mother like those of my friends. My dad and I cooked all the meals and handled all the other domestic chores. I never knew why it took so long for him to get rid of her.

Now, it was just Dad and me, Ron and Jeff Snelling, carrying on as always with our lives, but without her. It took several months for Dad to get his nerves settled down and realize he had his life back. He was only thirty-eight years old when she left, and it was only after that when I could see the color come back in his cheeks and a more frequent smile sweep over his lips. His sense of humor returned and he began to look younger. He'd been a champion distance swimmer in college and still had that drop-dead gorgeous swimmer's body

As for me, I'm six feet tall, 175 pounds, the same as my dad. In fact, we look very much alike. I wouldn't presume to say I'm handsome, but Dad, especially when he's dressed up, could have come off the pages of GQ magazine. I am also gay, but had never told my parents. There was enough upset in our family without my adding another wrenching dimension to it. I was not only attracted sexually to other men, I had always been wildly attracted to my own dad. But, of course, he never knew. I'd had a few sexual experiences in high school, nothing serious, but fun, nonetheless. I'd also enjoyed frequent circle-jerks with my friends. But practically all of my masturbation fantasies revolved around my dad. Thoughts of a sexual relationship with that young and beautiful manly specimen always served to bring on my most powerful orgasms.

In the summer, shortly after I graduated from high school, Dad and I spent a weekend constructing a deck at the back of the house. We'd both worked shirtless, and it was all I could do to keep my eyes off that bronze torso of his as it glistened with sweat. That Sunday night, we were hot and sweaty and tired, and after we'd had our showers, he opened a couple bottles of beer and asked me to sit out on the new deck with him. The sky was building up to a grand sunset and I felt so good just being with him like that. I could tell he had something on his mind.

"Jeff, I've been thinking about something," Dad said. "From now on, it's just the two of us sharing this house. You're eighteen now, which means we're both adults. I think we should think of ourselves as adults, two adult men. Since we'll be living so close, our lives will obviously be rather intertwined."

"I realize that," I said.

"What I'm trying to say is that, being so close all the time, it would be difficult for us not to know what is going on in each other's lives. Since we're adults, there's no reason why we can't be perfectly open with each other about . . . you know . . . things. It would be foolish to try and keep secrets when we're around each other all the time."

"I agree."

"For example," he continued, "I'm still a relatively young man."

"I know you are, Dad."

"And I have . . . you know . . . certain cravings."

"You're talking about sexual cravings, aren't you?" I said more bluntly than I'd intended.

"Of course. Now that your mother is gone, you can understand, can't you, that I might find myself interested in someone else."

"Of course I can understand that." I could tell Dad was struggling a little with what he was saying, and I wanted to be as encouraging and understanding as possible. He was still young and beautiful, and there was no reason he shouldn't give in to his natural cravings.

"You know, Jeff, all men have sexual cravings. I'm sure you do, and I hope it doesn't come as any surprise that, even though I'm your father, I have those cravings, too. As I said, I think, because we'll be living so close to each other in the same house, we both need to be perfectly open about it all. If I should sometime want to bring someone home for the night, I thing it would be foolish of me to sneak around about it. I'd rather have what we do in that regard open between us. Since we're both adults, there's no reason to be secretive about it."

"Dad, I understand. And I'm sure you also mean that I can be open about my bringing someone home for the night."

"Absolutely."

"Can I take it one step further, Dad? I think about sexual things a lot. I guess all guys my age do. And I'm not naive enough to believe you don't also think about sex. I'd really like to be able to talk about sexual things with you, no matter how detailed and personal, without any inhibitions. It would be important to me."

"That's my thought exactly. Complete openness. There's no point in being secretive about our lives when we're living so close together all the time."

I could tell Dad was more relaxed then. "And another thing, Dad. Do we have to talk about sexual things only in clinical terms? I've heard you say `fuck' and `shit' when you thought I couldn't hear. I'm familiar with all those words, too, you know. Sometimes those words are more expressive than `Intercourse' and `bowel movement.' As you say, I'm not a child anymore. I don't have to be protected from those words."

Dad laughed, now completely at ease with me. "Of course. I'm glad you're willing to be open in all these ways. I think I need to mention a couple of other things we need to be open about so you won't be caught by surprise. You may not know it, but I . . . you know . . . masturbate a lot. Some kids can't believe their fathers actually do it. And there's no doubt in my mind that you also jack off. I've heard the tell-tale noises coming from your bedroom. Understanding that we both do it, I don't think there should be any problem if we should, for example, happen to walk in on each other. I don't think we can be absolutely secret about some of the natural things all men do."

"You heard tell-tale noises?" I said.

Dad laughed. "Of course, Jeff. You've never been very good at having your orgasms quietly. Everyone can recognize an orgasmic groan when he hears it."

"I jack off a lot, dad, and I obviously haven't been able to make a secret of it. I'm relieved you know." I felt a warm wave sweep across my face. Dad and I had seen each other naked hundreds of times through the years, even sometimes when we had hard-ons. It was usually only in the mornings when I got a glimpse of his normal morning erection. He had a very limp and very long ball sack, and the two balls that lay heavily in the bottom of it were clearly visible. The sight of it drove me nuts sometimes. But the thought of actually seeing my dad jerk-off and shoot his sperm made my heart race.

"Then there's another thing," he said, speaking hesitantly again. "I happen to have a large collection of porno videos I like to watch when I'm a little . . . you know . . . horny. I like to jack off while watching them in my room. I hope that doesn't shock you. That's something I don't want to keep secret from you. I want you to realize all men, young and old, are sexually excited by pornography."

"Of course I realize that. I wouldn't be human if I didn't."

Dad brought out some more beer and we sat quietly for awhile, luxuriating not only in the beauty of the sunset, but in our newfound openness.

Dad looked at the bottle in his hand for a few moments and then said, "Jeff, have you ever fucked a girl?"

I didn't expect that, but I had to remember that there were to be no secrets. "No, Dad. It just hasn't happened. The dates I've had never seemed to want that."

"Did you ever get close to it?"

I had dated only for appearances sake. But I knew he was curious about what I actually did on those dates. More openness. "Well, pretty close. I did get a couple of them off with my fingers."

"Did any of them give you a blow job?"

"No, I'm afraid not. How about you, Dad? Did you ever get a blow job?" Even though I'd said I wanted to talk openly about sexual things, I wasn't sure yet that I'd become entirely comfortable with it. Asking my dad if he'd had his cock sucked was something I never dreamed I'd ever ask him.

"Of course, I did. Every guy sooner or later gets his cock sucked. Your time will come."

We finally said goodnight and went off to our separate bedrooms. I lay awake for hours, it seemed. We'd agreed to be open about everything in our lives, which meant everything in our sexual lives. But I knew I could never tell him about my homosexuality, my being gay. I didn't lie about not getting a blow job from one of those girls. But several guys had sucked my dick. I couldn't tell him that. I just couldn't. I wanted to be open with him about everything, but if he knew I had sex with guys, it would ruin everything.

I began to imagine Dad in his room jacking off. He said it would be just fine if I ever walked in on him. But for some reason I was afraid to. I knew, though, I had to get over that feeling because, inside, I wanted so badly to see my dad jack off and shoot his sperm.

Several weeks passed. Neither of us had walked in on the other while we were masturbating, but we became very much at ease talking about all aspects and all kinds of heterosexual sex, including different forms of self-pleasuring that I hadn't ever heard of. One night at the dinner table, Dad began talking about my mother.

"Jeff, I can't get over how pleasant life has become since your mother left. She was a fucking slut, Jeff. She'd let me fuck her, but it got to the point I couldn't stand to put my dick into that sloppy cunt of hers where probably a half dozen other cocks had been that day. She was nothing but a walking cunt. It wasn't fair to you, Jeff. I'm sorry I hadn't thrown her filthy ass out years ago."

"Don't be sorry for my sake, Dad. I had you, and that's all I needed.

Later that night, I got ready for bed and walked naked down the hall to the bathroom. As I passed by my dad's open door, I could hear he had his TV on. Looking in, I saw him lying naked along the far edge of his king-sized bed, slowing stroking his hard penis. On the TV was one of his porno flicks. He turned his head and saw me.

"Hi, Jeff. You want to see a really great triple-X?"

I stepped inside as my penis went from soft to hard in seconds. "That looks pretty wild, Dad."

"Come on in, if you want to. You already missed a pretty good part. This little blond had three cocks in her all at once, one up her ass, one in her pussy, and one in her mouth. There's more to come. Come on, lie down there and enjoy the show. I see you're already hard and ready to go."

He motioned me to lie down on the other edge of the bed, leaving about three feet between us. He continued to watch the video, but I could hardly take my eyes off him. He had his balls clutched in one hand and his hard penis in the other. I stroked very slowly because just the sight of his body, then in the throes of sexual excitement, had brought me almost instantly to the verge of cumming. I wanted to hold off until after I watched his sperm shoot from his penis. He seemed so unperturbed that I, his son, was there watching him. Oh, God. How I wanted him. How I wanted to roll over to him and take his beautiful body in my arms and taste every inch of it with my tongue and lips.

"Oh, look, Jeff. She's taking a full load from each of them right in the face. It's dripping into her eyes, her nose, her ears and her mouth."

Dad was stroking harder then. He was using his saliva and every stroke slurped erotically. I could see those gorgeous legs of his stiffening up, with every muscle straining. He was breathing harder, and his facial muscles were contorted. He raised his hips slightly off the bed, revealing his two round and firm ass cheeks. He started to lurch his head and chest forward, and then it happened. With a fierce growl, the first volley of thick white sperm shot from his penis high in the air, landing with a splat on one of his nipples. Then another and another. His face was contorted as though he were in terrible pain. Then another stream of his cum shot out, and another.

When his orgasm was over, all the muscles in his body began to relax and soften. His eyes were closed and he lay there gasping. I looked at the pools of sperm lying there like thick pudding on his chest and stomach. I couldn't hold it any longer. I don't believe I had ever had an orgasm so powerful and long lasting. I let out my usual "orgasmic groan" as my sperm shot out, mostly onto my neck.

We both lay there, gasping for air as the woman on the tape slurped on the dick of one of the men.

Dad finally said, "It looks like you had a good one there, Jeff. These hot videos will do it every time."

Little did he know it was the sight of his own hot body and his masturbating that did it for me. Not the video.

"Dad climbed off the bed and said, "Well, I'm going to take a shower and get this sticky cum off me. I'll be just a few minutes. Then you better do the same."

After my shower, I went to bed and spent another restless night. I hadn't dreamed that the new openness we'd agree to would allow me to lie in bed with my dad and jerk off together. He'd seemed so calm as he invited me to join him. I could tell he was definitely taking this openness thing very seriously. As I lay there thinking about it, I realized I was hard again and began to stroke. I'd left my door open, hoping he might come in, but he'd gone to bed and was sound asleep.

For weeks following that, we jacked off together many nights in his bed while watching young men and women sucking and fucking on the TV screen. It was then fall, and I'd enrolled at the local University as a freshman. Very quickly I met another new student who was not only gay, but also a true beauty. He lived in the residence hall. On several occasions, we sucked each other off in the back seat of one or the other of our cars. But I really wanted to spend the night with him. Dad had assured me that I could have someone come home with me and spend the night with me in my room.

I thought about it a great deal. I had promised Dad there would be no secrets. But I was afraid to reveal the secret that I was a homosexual and liked men. It bothered me that I was hiding the secret from him. I finally made up my mind that he had to know. I couldn't be deceitful any longer.

While at the breakfast table one morning, I said, "Dad, we agreed that each of us could feel free to bring someone home to sleep with us."

"That's right."

"Well, I want to bring someone home to sleep with me tonight."

"That's fine, Jeff. We agreed to that." Dad looked at me with a sly smile. "This'll be your first time, right? I have plenty of condoms. I'll put a package on your dresser. Can't be too cautious, you know. Do I know her?"

This was it, I thought. Now or never. "No, dad. It's a guy. I met him at school." I stared at Dad, waiting for the shock to register on his face.

"That's fine, Jeff. If you like him and he's still here in the morning, maybe he'd like to stay for breakfast. I've got to get going to work. Will you have time to do the dishes?"

After Dad left, I truly thought I'd been dreaming. I announced I was going to sleep with another guy, obviously for sex, and all he said was, "That's fine." The boy came to sleep with me several more times over the next several weeks, and it was with him that I first learned to fuck and be fucked. It was the first time for him, too. And never did Dad come in on us or make his presence known to us those nights. It was how he promised it would be.

During the second month of school, I had a day off and decided to stay home. My dad went to work early and told me he wouldn't be home for supper because of a business meeting that evening. He wasn't sure when he'd be home. That afternoon, I was in the mood to watch one of Dad's porno videos and enjoy a long slow edging jack-off while I watched. Dad had always selected the videos we'd seen, but I knew where he stored them. I went to the cabinet and was surprised that he had more tapes than I'd thought. I looked through some of them and put aside those I'd already seen. There was a large box with a lid sitting on the floor of the cabinet. When I opened it, I saw at least fifty more tapes. It took me only minutes to realize they were all porno videos of men only. Almost every one of them was about male orgies, one on one and group sex. After looking at the pictures on the jackets, I put them back and replaced the lid.

I went to my room and flopped down on my bed. 'How could this be,' I thought. 'Dad isn't gay. Why does he have all those gay video's hidden away in that box?' I lay there for a long time trying to think what it all meant. I remembered how surprisingly supportive he was of my having another guy sleep with me all those nights. And we'd agreed that I should think nothing of it when he would bring a woman home to sleep with him. No, he didn't say a "woman." He just said someone. But he'd brought no one home to sleep with him in all those months. I couldn't understand it and closed my eyes. I fell asleep, but awoke with a start. That was it. He wanted to bring another man home to sleep with him. Not a woman, but another man. But he never did. No, he never did because he didn't want me to know about . . . . My God, I thought. Could it really be that my dad is homosexual? Was he simply afraid to let me know? And all those evenings when he said he had business meetings and didn't come home until around midnight?

I could hardly explain the tangle of thoughts that raced through my mind. I started to cry. I cried for him and for the pain he must have been going through. And I cried with a weird feeling of joy that my dad might be like me, that he might want to love me like I want to love him. God, how I loved him. I was determined to wait up for him, throw my arms around him and tell him how much I loved him, tell him he can take me in any way he wishes, ravage me, suck me, fuck me!

I awoke, still fully clothed and hot and sweaty. My eyes were full of matter from crying. Dad was standing over me. He said, "Wake up, Jeff, you'll be late for school. Why are you still in your clothes?"

I looked up at him and started crying again. He sat on the side of the bed and brushed my hair back from my forehead. "Jeff. What's the matter?"

I bravely said, "Nothing, Dad. I guess I was just having a dream. I'm all right."

"I glad. I'll be off to work now. See you tonight."

I went through my classes that day, hardly hearing a word the teachers spoke. I had to find out about Dad. I just had to. Not long before bedtime that night, Dad invited me in for another jack-off session while viewing one of his videos. As usual, I lay on one edge of the bed with this three-foot gap between us.

As he selected the video from his cabinet, I saw that long ball sack swinging from behind. I said, "Dad, don't put the video on, not just yet. I really think I want to talk with you a little." As Dad lay down on the bed and looked at me, I said, "I know we want to be truthful with each other. So I have to tell you that I wanted to jack off to a video yesterday afternoon. So I looked in your cabinet for one. Maybe I shouldn't have done that without your being here. But anyway, I found . . . uh, I found that bunch of videos you have in a box that are . . . all gay with men only."

"Oh, those," dad said with a wave of his hand. "I never look at those. That's why I have them put away in a box."

"But you have them, dad. There must be a reason you have them at all."

Dad turned his head and stared at the ceiling without speaking. I could see the muscles in his legs and arms clenching.

"Dad," I said quietly, "You know about me. I was truthful about that. Remember, we agreed there'd be no secrets between us? That was the last secret I had, and I revealed to you. It was very hard for me to do it because I didn't know how you'd react. But I did it because we agreed. No secrets. Remember? But you were perfectly okay with me sleeping with another guy and knowing that I'm gay."

Still staring at the ceiling, he said softly, "Yes, that's true."

"You told me we should each feel free to bring someone home to spend the night with us. I went ahead and did that. But you never have. You've never brought anyone home like I expected you would. And, dad . . . I think I know why."

Dad's voice was barely audible. "You do?"

"It's because it was never a woman you wanted to bring home. It was a man. Just like me. A man. I did it, and you approved. Do you think I wouldn't approve if you brought a man home to sleep with you? How could you think I wouldn't approve?"

"Oh, Jeff."

"You were the one who first mentioned that we should have no secrets about our lives. Why did you think you had to keep that one from me."

Dad turned his face toward me. "Jeff, it's one thing for a boy to admit to his father he's gay. But it's quite another for a father to admit his own homosexuality to his son. Not very many sons could stand to hear that his father is a deviate, a queer, a fag."

I was about ready to cry again, but held it off. "Dad, I'm going to admit something else to you. I love you dad. I've loved you all my life. Not just as my father, but as . . . . I wanted us to be lovers. That's right, lovers. I love you in that way." Tears finally did come to my eyes. "I've wanted to touch you, to feel and smell your skin, to kiss your lips, to run my hands and my lips and my tongue over every inch of your body. I don't know how else to tell you how much I love you."

I lay there, still three feet away from him, with my hands over my face, tears streaming down my cheeks.

When I removed my hands, I saw Dad on his side, holding out his arms to me. There were tears in his eyes, also. I scooted over to him, and he took me into his arms and held me tightly against his body. I felt his hand caressing my head, my neck and my back. As he pressed my head against him, I kissed his skin and could taste my tears that were flowing onto his chest.

Dad continued to hold me tightly as he ran his hand lightly over my back. "Jeff, dear Jeff. I wanted to tell you, and there were times when I almost did. It's not easy for a man to tell his son something like that. We may be just two adults who can talk freely with each other. But I'm still your father. And I just couldn't get past that. I'm glad you know. And I'm glad you're not angry or hurt over . . . . Yes, I am homosexual. I always have been. And yes, I've long agonized over my love for you. One reason I wanted us to agree to be open with each other was that it would somehow bring me close to admitting how much I love you. I thought I could then make that final admission, but I was afraid you'd turn against me. Yes, I do love you, Jeff. And I love you in every way you said you wanted to love me . . . as lovers. Holding you like this, feeling your body pressed against mine with my hands on your soft skin. This and more is what I've craved for so long."

Dad moved my head away from his chest and kissed me lightly on the lips, now wet with tears. Then he gently laid me over on my back and looked down at me. "Nothing but the truth, my dear sweet Jeff. There's no longer anything to hide. I love you in every way it's possible to love someone."

He hung over me, supporting himself with his arms. He lowered his face toward my chest, and I could feel his tongue slowly moving across my skin and onto each nipple. Then down over my stomach and my hips and into my navel. His chest was now touching my hard penis and I could feel it throbbing against it.

He looked up at me and said, "Your skin is so soft and tastes exactly as wonderful as I so often imagined it would."

I held on to his arms as they supported him over me. Feeling the gentle ridges of muscle in his forearms and the soft hair that covered them sent an indescribable thrill through my body.

He didn't take my penis into his mouth, but rather let it slide over his face as he moved his head lower. He slid farther down on the bed and spread my legs wide. I could feel his hot breath in my crotch as he ran his tongue over my balls and down to the sensitive area below them.

He soon raised his head and said in such a sweet voice, "Are you all right, Jeff? Please tell me it's all right."

I didn't want to, but I started crying again. Choking, I said, "Nothing could be more right, dad." I raised my head and looked at him. His face was wreathed in longing and a passion I'd never seen on him before. He so rapidly went after my body, and with no hesitation, that I realized then how much he had desired me for so long. I could hardly believe I was watching his tongue sweep across my balls and then up along the underside of my penis.

He took hold of each of my legs in both hands and ran his tongue over them. "You have such wonderful legs, Jeff. They taste and smell so good. I've wanted so much to take them in my mouth and love them."

His head was once again buried in my crotch, and I could feel his tongue on my asshole. "Oh, God, Dad. Push it in," I pleaded for him to enter me. I could feel him licking all around the crack and slurping as he did it. His head was suddenly up again, and he slipped his lips over my aching, hard penis. I watched as he twisted his head, swirling his tongue and lips over the head and the down over the whole length of it.

"Dad, not yet. Please. I don't want to cum yet."

As he pulled off and smiled at me, I hooked my hands under his armpits and tried to pull him up over me. He was too heavy, and he rolled over on his back. I got down between his legs. As I raised them, I plunged my face into his crotch. I'd so often dreamed of having my face smothered in the hot, moist darkness of his crotch. Dad, still with a look of desperate passion on his face, jumped up and stood straddling my body. He slowly lowered those beautiful, full round ass cheeks down on my head. That long swinging ball sack, that I had admired all my life, dragged across my face. I told him to stop for a moment so I could lick them and suck on them. He moaned as I did it. And then he pushed down where I could get my tongue on his asshole. I tried to push it in as he pushed his pucker outward. My tongue went in easily. If I had died at that moment, I would have died the happiest person on Earth.

After awhile, he pulled off and turned to face me with his hard rod close to my lips. Long elastic strings of semen were dangling from it. I reached my tongue up and licked the tip of it and savored the taste of it. He lowered himself and slowly slipped his penis into my mouth. I took hold of his hips and pulled him down so I could take the full length of it. He started to fuck my mouth and I was so glad to realize I could take the whole length of it without gagging. I didn't want him to stop. I wanted him to cum and send his sperm into my throat. I'd long fantasized having his cum in my mouth and letting it seep down my throat and into my stomach. He began to sweat profusely, and it was running off his hips onto my chest and face. I wanted to drown in his sweat.

He was pounding my mouth harder and harder. I could feel the veins on his penis enlarging and throbbing. I held on to the back of his thighs as they rose and fell. I could feel the muscles in his legs tightening. Then it happened. As I felt his gorged penis throbbing hard against the roof of my mouth, I was suddenly flooded with what seemed like thick hot pudding, sweet and smooth. To have my dad's sperm in my mouth made my mind spin. It filled my mouth so completely, I had to swallow, instead of letting it seep down my throat.

Dad pulled back and kissed me lightly all over my face, as his sweat streamed off his forehead and cheeks onto my mouth and eyes. Then he ran his tongue over my lips before plunging it into my mouth. We kissed deeply for several minutes. When he pulled away, he whispered, "I like the taste of my sperm after it's been in your mouth. Do you ever taste your own sperm?

"Yes, always," I said. "I always like to scoop it up and eat it."

He reached into the drawer of the bed table and took out a tube of lubricant. As I lay stretched out on my back, he slathered some all over my hard penis and then reached under him and greased up his asshole. I lay there watching him as he stood again straddling my body, his long ball sack swinging back and forth. Then he lowered himself slowly onto my rod. In one swift motion, his ass cheeks were on my hips, and my penis was completely inside of him. My eyes feasted on his face and muscled body as he rose up and down on my penis. The tightness of his asshole felt so good as he clenched and unclenched his sphincter muscle. I could feel the warmth of his rectum as my penis slipped in and out of it. 'Oh, God,' I thought. 'Don't let me cum yet. Let this last forever.' I could see my penis going in and out. His pectorals were rippling, and his stomach heaving with each deep breath he took. His face was sweaty and he had a look of intense concentration in his eyes. His whole being was completely engulfed in a frenzy of sexual passion. His penis had again become hard with large cords and veins surrounding it. It bobbed up and down with every motion of his hips and threw strings of pre-cum onto my stomach. He started pushing down on me harder, and I knew I couldn't hold off.

"Oh, God. I'm cumming, Dad." My orgasm overtook my whole body, and I surrendered completely to its power. I saw his face contort and his mouth fall open. With a deep guttural growl, another load of his sperm shot out onto my stomach and chest.

Dad finally settled down slowly on my hips, gasping for air. Sweat poured off of him and mingled with his sperm on my stomach.

We were both exhausted. He rolled off and lay beside me, our bodies touching. He pulled me over so my head lay on his chest. I was almost drunk with the smell of his sweaty body, mingled with the smell of sex. We lay there for a long time, saying nothing. Then he reached down to the floor and picked up a towel. He carefully wiped off my stomach and the sweat on my face and then wiped his own body.

He lay there propped up on one elbow and looked down at me. He smiled with that wonderfully loving smile of his. "Are you all right, my beautiful sweet Jeff?"

"I couldn't be more all right. We did it, didn't we? We got rid of all our secrets. No more secrets."

"I know. Thanks to you. I love you so much. It feels so good to say it. Almost as good as showing you how much I love you."

We put our arms around each other and were soon asleep.

My dad and I have been lovers ever since. We have performed and enjoyed every possible sexual act known to man with each other. There was never anyone else. We still watched the videos, but now only the gay ones. But over time, we lost our interest in all those actors who went through the motions for the camera. We preferred the spontaneous love-making we had with each other. It was our shared secret. As he had once said, our lives were completely intertwined.