The Electro-Cinch Controversy
By: Randall Austin
(© 2012 by the author)

The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at...

(Let's Get Real, Folks!)

"Everyone knows that slaves lead carefree lives." That is the line the slave lobbyists are currently using in their Fall ad campaign, which attempts to put a benign face on slavery. Although slavery opponents are currently fiercely condemning that line, the fact of the matter is that statement is true for most slaves most of the time.

Let's look at that statement realistically. Slaves work 8 hours a day. You also probably work 8 hours a day. No difference there. But you get a paycheck, your slaves do not. But slaves never have to buy a thing, because they have everything they need; food, clothing, and shelter is all provided for them for their entire lives. And you are the one who has to provide all of those things for your slaves out of your paycheck. Slaves have no responsibility whatsoever in life. You as a free person have tons of pressing responsibilities, schedules and deadlines to meet.

Some try to point out that the discipline which slaves are subjected to will completely unbalance the equation. But let us examine that statement, also, in the light of reality. There are 1440 minutes in a day, for a total of 86,400 seconds. Let's say you give your slave a face slapping for back talk. If that slave is typical, you slap his face probably once every two weeks. That is probably 2 seconds of pain out of a two-week total of 1,209,600 seconds. Let's get real folks. If you back talk your boss, you are going to be suffering the consequences of your action for a lot more than 2 seconds out of a two-week period!

But, some may say, slaves are spanked and whipped. Let's look at that as well. If you have a young male slave, under the age of 30, chances are you have had to give him a spanking or whipping once or twice in the last six months. Let's even say it was a severe beating, lasting 10 minutes nonstop. Okay fine. The slave learns from that spanking or whipping the one thing he has to know how to do, which is to obey. It took 10 minutes time out of an entire 6 months. Again, just by stating the facts in that way the misleading nature of the anti-slaver's claims becomes instantly apparent. What if you, your life consisted of 10 minutes of difficulty once every 6 months? You should have it so good.

Which brings us to the Electro-Cinch, which the anti-slavers are bringing up in their latest ad campaign. The Electro-Cinch is that state of the art slave control device that is all the rage in farming communities. With the Electro-Cinch one overseer can control up to 500 slaves at a time. I wanted to get a first hand view of the Electro-Cinch in action, so I contacted a friend of mine, Kevin Cornell, who is a handler at Baldwin/Fletcher Farms. Baldwin/Fletcher Farms are well known throughout the state, both for offering terrific produce and premium canned fruits and vegetables (with the happy slave logo), and also for their catchy television commercials. One featured the waltzing field slaves singing, 'We are dancing because we love you', and another featured the two handsome Baldwin brothers, Arnold and Retcher, doing a humorous slapstick routine with several of their slaves, which won the 2012 California Ad Campaign's Best Short Commercial Award.

Kevin invited me out to Baldwin/Fletcher last September to have me observe the Electro-Cinch in action, first hand. Kevin is a typical California slave handler. At 27 years old he is roughly the same age as most of the slaves he overseers. He shares a common background with most of them; middleclass upbringing, attended Point Loma High School in San Diego, former skateboarder (probably busted a few sags in his time), played in his own band. Half of the slaves could probably give Kevin tips on spiking his hair (not that this stylish and sleek haired overseer needs advice from anyone). Kevin understands his charges thoroughly, and can empathize with them.

Baldwin/Fletcher employs the Electro-Cinch system only a couple of weeks out of each year, mainly for a two-week period during peak harvesting time in the fall.

The Electro-Cinch System is a great convenience and important money saver whether you have one slave or several hundred. Safe, easy to use and maintain, humane, and effective. And the cinch itself, the band which goes about the root of the male slave's penis and scrotum, is an attractive bit of jewelry in its own right. The Electro-Cinch system is designed to deliver encouragement to slaves in the form of electric shocks to the root of the slave's penis that range from very mild to very severe. Generally, the lowest setting is all that is ever required, a setting that simply delivers a low voltage shock which produces an unsettling, queasy feeling that quickly has one slave or an entire herd scrambling to satisfy an overseer's demands.

Banding the slaves with the Electro-Cinch was an easy matter. You gather the root of the cock and balls with both hands, making sure both balls are out in front of the root and not in hiding, then with the right hand you encircle the root with the high tech metal-plastic cinch, snap it into place, and it locks automatically. Kevin had the 240 naked slaves form into two lines, and we each banded them. We had all 240 puppy dog tails cinched and locked in less than an hour. The cinch is convenient. It can stay on for as long as you need it, the slaves can bathe with it on, and it gives a nice lift to the slaves' jewelry bag. A slave with a good package lift is an attractive addition to any California garden.

There was good-natured banter among the slaves as they lined up to get cinched. Those slaves who had been around for at least one year at Baldwin/Fletcher already knew that harvest time was a time when a little more was asked of them. The experienced slaves told the newbie's that it was basically no big deal. There was joking among the slaves as we banded them, and even good-natured interplay between Kevin, the slaves, and me as we cinched them. Once we had them banded, they would go off to their fellow slaves and compare bands, and ask if it looked good on them, and so on. Laughter and good spirits prevailed.

Each Electro-Cinch (EC) band is numbered, and around the neck of each slave is hung a lightweight sandwich board sign with the number of the slave's EC band showing both front and back. An overseer can thus treat selected individuals, the entire herd at once, or the entire herd minus select individuals. The control unit itself is a sleek handheld device, a great improvement from the large console control board that only a few years ago had to be hauled out into the field.

Seeing that much man flesh get fitted with the EC system made me, as a person who is constantly thinking 'bottom line', feel really good because I knew that all of that man/boy flesh was going to get used to the max. It's going to be a good day for profits when the herd marches out into the fields fitted with the EC. You know the herd is going to get used for all its worth.

Although slaves lead in general a pretty easy and care free life, and they know it, there are times when they, like all of us, have to give a little more. I suppose it is true that even the happiest slave, when he's getting fitted with the EC may be longing just a little bit for the old days when he was free to lounge around listening to rock music and drinking beer. He knows that when he's banded with the EC he's going to be putting out some sweat. But all responsible slaveholders know that the EC is a tool that in the long run will benefit not only their bottom line, but the morale of the slaves as well. When things are hectic and at high pressure in an active work environment, overseers have been known to lash out unfairly at everyone in sight. The beauty of the EC system is that such missteps are minimized. And when corrective or encouragement treatment is needed, the slave does not identify the corrective measure with a particular overseer or face. Thus slave hostility towards particular overseers becomes less of a problem.

Even more beautiful, one overseer can control an entire herd of field slaves. The day I was with Kevin he alone was able to make a herd of 230 prime field slaves produce at maximum output level. It was impressive.

Throughout the day Kevin had to deliver EC 'treatments', or 'gentle reminders', as he prefers to call electro-shocking the herd, only about once or twice an hour. Those few gentle reminders helped the herd to concentrate more on what they were doing, and keep productivity up. Only once did Kevin have to give a slave special treatment. Little Jambo, a cute 28-year-old slave was seen to be positioning himself among larger individuals so he could slack. Kevin gave him one treatment on the number 3 setting, and soon Little Jambo was scrambling and hopping and bobbing and laboring merrily along with the rest of the herd.

Kevin told me Little Jambo was one of their most rambunctious pieces of livestock on the Estate, and sure enough, at day's end he was overheard to be making a joke at a fellow team member's expense. Kevin could have saved himself a lot of time and given him a punishment treatment with the Electro-Cinch. But being a typical humane young generation California overseer, Kevin opted instead to pull Little Jambo out of line, take down his trousers, put him over his knee, and use the punishment strap on his behind for a vigorous 5 minute strapping session. At the end of the strapping Little Jambo was crying, apologizing, and hopping around just like a little boy who had been disciplined by an older brother. Although Kevin is, of course, younger than Little Jambo, all male slaves are really nothing more than little boys at heart; in need of plenty of watching, encouragement, punishment diaperings, face slappings, spankings, nipple clampings, scrotum weightings, buttock strappings, back tawsings, and total body whippings.

Kevin's girl friend, Susan Golthchie, dropped by for a lunchtime visit, and he entertained her at one point by juicing the entire herd with a microburst. Susan got to see 230 slaves instantly and simultaneously erect to the hilt and then start scrambling like nobody's business. The entire herd was boned and hopping to please with just a single flick of an overseer's finger. Kevin gave me a nod to watch Susan ogle the team with her pretty mouth wide open, and her eyes transfixed. He gave me a devilish wink, as if to say, "Ah, California living!"

Susan told me she was, like all young girls, fascinated with horses and slaves for as long as she could remember. She subscribes to Slave Today, and was getting regular catalogue mailings from the major auction houses in her area well before she entered her teens. She even would manage to cajole her father into taking her to auctions on several occasions when a slave she fancied in one of the catalogues was up for auction.

That is one reason psychologists recommend giving your young daughters some responsibility in the upkeep and management of your slaves. See last month's article in 'California Drudge and Garden' on 'Purchasing the Right Male Slave for Your Preteen Daughter'.

What I saw at day's end was a happy herd leaving the fields, laughing, smiling, and joking. The relatively stringent harvest quota for the day was met, and not a single slave suffered a tawsing or whipping, or incurred a single welt, mark, or scar, that is with the exception of the naughty, misbehaving, Little Jambo. But I am certain that the staunchest anti-slaver would have enjoyed seeing the daisies get spanked out of that little scamp.

To me, the Electro-Cinch controversy is not so much a controversy as it is another nail in the coffin of the antislavery forces. The Electro-Cinch, rather than being cruel and unusual punishment, is slave control at its most benign and humane.

The End.

Posted: 09/14/12